Of Romance Anew Ch. 01

After paying I quickly shove the book -A trip with misadventure on an autumn eve- along with my shameful guilt into the plastic bag. Next we head to the clothes store, Alice keeps shoving skinny jeans towards me and stuff like fedoras and t-shirts with bands on them, I refuse most, though I do try on a black shirt with a skull print on it well wearing a white button up over it. But after looking at the price I know its too much for me to afford, I quickly return them the their proper places, she gets a new pair of jeans and some strange leather gloves with no finger tips, I look at them curiously, they look rather useless to me, with the finger tips gone what good are they? your hands are still greatly unprotected , once again I find myself shaking my head at her odd sense of clothing fashion.

Finally at 3:00 we end up at the mall, she resumes riding my shoulders, most of the people here we know, since the town is not that big, even the mall is rather small, but its still fun. Well riding my shoulders she points to kiosks and stores she wants to go to. We get these candle coated cotton candy balls on a stick at this one kiosk, also she gets me a wrist band and forces it on my right wrist, its pretty loose fitting and I fidget with it constantly, eventually I read what it says, its dark grey with scarlet words reading -never doubt the uniqueness of a common object- I frown, this is much more fitting for her to wear, but I keep it on to please her.

A half hour later we are sitting with two plates of food in front of us, she dips chicken strips in ranch and eats happily, well I obverse my tuna salad and half meatball sub, I find it hard to work up an appetite.

"You still have not told me what is troubling you." She says accusingly, the glare from the bus returning.

"I-I... I am not sure I feel comfortable talking about it... it's personal... " I mumble back weakly.

A sharp retort soon follows "What! And we are not personal!? You are the only person I know who even knows me back! You can tell me anything!" I lift my gaze to her brown eyes but quickly drop my head shamefully.

"You... promise... you promise you won't hate me or tell anyone?" My gut clenches, I feel wrong, like I should not tell her, fear fills my stomach, my hands clench tightly.

"Yea sure, I promise, what is it?" she says tilting her head sideways, her face full of confusion and curiosity.

I gulp nervously, a sweat breaking across my brow, my hands going pale as I clench them tightly, I feel like I am about to puke. "What say I loved someone... but... it was wrong, someone I was not supposed to love in that kind of way. Most people would shun it, call it gross or repulsive... would you still accept me?"

She looks into my eyes, her face losing the glare and questioning look now one of concern. "What are you talking about?"

"I think... that I love." I quickly look around to be assured no one was listening in or was within ear shot, pleased that no one was I continued "I think I may be in love with my father... not as my Dad but... sexually attracted." My head drops in shame.

It's a short while before I can even lift my gaze to her, I notice my hands are shaking and my teeth are grinding, I have never been filled with so much fear. Her brow is furrowed in questioning, she just stares, is she wondering what kind of sick pervert I am? Maybe she thinks it's a joke, maybe if I laugh she will believe it was, I try but I cannot even move my tongue. She lifts her right arm and grabs one of her wrist bands, oh no, she going to throw all the stuff I have gotten her at me and call me names and run off. My gut twists knots as I just wish I could sink into the earth and leave this behind. She finally gets a purple wrist band off, she grabs my trembling arm, taking off they grey one and sliding on the purple one, I look confused. Slowly I lift it and read it out loud, my tongue stumbling in fear.

"Any love, anyone, always beautiful, always true."... My mind swirls as I try to figure the meaning out, though soon she grabs my still trembling hands tightly and smiles.

"It's okay Greg, who am I to say what love is acceptable and what love is wrong?" her soft smile and gentle hold over my hands calms me.

The knots slowly untwist, I feel relief in my gut, my hands manage to stop shaking as I feel tears well up within my eyes. She accepts me... even though its weird and most would be disgusted... she accepts... I let out a heavy sigh of relief and chuckle weakly.

"I have no idea why I doubted that you would accept this... you... you are the best friend I could have Alice... " the tears welling up fade as I grip her hands in return.

We sit there like this for a long while, but soon her watch is beeping with 4:00 and the bus leaves for our bus stop at 4:10. I would not mind a long walk back with her but I promised Dad I would be back before dinner, we wrap up our lefts overs, she takes her perch on my shoulders and soon we are back on the bus.

Before long I am leaving her at her door step, with the sun low in the sky it would be the perfect time for a romantic kiss, though I just chuckle at the thought. And now I am arriving back at my own doorstep. As I head in my eyes drift to the clock, 5:00, that gives me a bit of time before I have to start dinner. I slowly make my way upstairs, might as well give Dad his book. Normally I would hear the tell-tale signs but with my head so clouded with emotion I hardly noticed, I open his slightly ajar door and step in, my gaze going up to find a naked hairy body, a strong hand wrapped around a thick member, my eyes flitting over his body, the smell of his musk filling my nose, clouding my head even more, his blue eyes look at me in shock, quickly yanking his blanket over his crotch.

"G-Greg!?" his deep voice booms out, cracking at the start, obviously surprised.

"SORRY!" I shout out quickly, the book falling to the floor as I turn pulling the door shut, rapidly fleeing downstairs.

I feel the sensation, the pit in my stomach, the reddening of my cheeks, I feel my full length hardening rapidly, my heart beating faster. I stumble as I go to the kitchen, deciding to distract myself with preparing dinner, getting pots out and food, he comes down a few minutes later. He holds the book in his left hand, I doubt he has had a chance to wash his right hand, I can still smell the musk on him, a bulge showing clearly in his pants, I don't stare, but my eyes constantly travel down there. He must of wanted to rush down so it would not seem like he was finishing, he must of really been into it to still be hard.

"Thanks for the book... umm, what you saw in my room... it's something us men have to do every so often... " his gruff tone speaks out awkwardly, it seems to be more consoling than upset. obviously he is embarrassed.

"No no, its fine Dad." I say nervously, I push myself near the counter to hide my own erection "I understand" I give a half-hearted chuckle that obviously sounds nervous.

"Good... good... than we can forget it happened okay?" he moves as if he was going to give a hug, but he must have remembered his own bulge.

Good thing to because there is no way to hug back without revealing my own, though his hand extends and I, instinctively take it, though it appears we both regret it since its still damp with what I can only imagine is pre-cum and sweat mixed with musk, I yank my hand back instinctively since his hand is damp, he yanks it back remembering what he just had it wrapped around. It seems as if he wanted to say more but he just turns and moves quickly for the bathroom.

I move the sink but soon I to remember what he had his hand wrapped around, I check to assure he is gone than bring my hand to my face, inhaling deeply, my knees nearly buckle as the scent of his pre-cum and musk rush through my nose, my mind is so clouded with hormones, my cock nearly tearing through my boxers... It takes all my will not to jack off with the musky scent of my father on my hand.

Though now I feel more light headed and sicker than ever, my heads clouded with hormones, my confusion about my Dad is worse than ever and I can hardly stand up... I have no idea how I am going to make it through this summer.