by Devils_Revenge
Loved both of your stories and then went looking for more and found you haven't uploaded since 2006. Please come back and write more, you are one of the best writers I've seen on here and the way that you mix in real life emotions to make it more emmersive with a truly heartfelt and hot story is absolutely perfect. If you are still out there and are still active please come back and write more, if you want any help or advice just reply to this, I'll even be an editor for you if you like, literally anything to get you to write again.
Well I am a female reader and I have to say this was really enjoyable. A lot of times you come across stories on this site with very little depth to them where as this had absolutely the right amount of emotion and background to it. I loved the teasing and jealousy elements and overall thought it was a fantastic read.
So, I've read both of your stories, and I do have to say that this is the bettter or the two. I like how you added another character, and how Rachel feels a connection with him. Please write more with Steve and Rachel!!
i hope youll be writing more about rachel please
The story was alright. Not the best I've read but enjoy-able. Personally I would try to make things a little more beleiveable, like the brother confronting his sis. No guy likes hearing his sis fuck, or be fucke no matter what the relation may be no one likes finding out there sister is a whore.
I've read both of these stories .. they are wonderful! I really hope we will be reading more about Rachel. Don't let the critics turn you off adding to this interesting story. It was absolutely HOTTT !!!
great story i read rachels cold and had to read this these storys are awsome why dont you make a 3rd? i bet we'd all love to read it
I thought it was very hot.
On a sidenote, to anyone else who shares the feeling that Rachel and Steve are immoral and horrible: erotica websites are not the best places to go bashing anything that doesn't fit into your definition of morality. Incest freaks, adulterers, and rape-lovers, we all share this site so there's really no point in criticizing anyone on here for not adhering to your moral standards.
I can't believe you only have two stories on here!
I need more, you're great!
i found it extreamly exciting that they did it in the same room. can't wait for more
I liked the fact that they mixed things up a little! Why shouldn't Rachel get some from someone else when her brother had a girl? It was only fair. I liked that they were fucking right there in the same room, I almost wanted her brother to wake up and join them! That wouldve been soooo hot!
THIS WAS A FUCKING GREAT AND HONEST STORY . SOME PEOPLE ACTUALY DO ENJOY FUCKING FOR THE PLEASURE THEY GIVE TO OTHERS AND NOT JUST THINKING OF THEMSELVES .THAT'S WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE THESE ARE AND WE NEED MORE OF THEM . WHY DO ASSHOLES HAVE TO GO AROUND RAPING PEOPLE AND ABUSING KIDS ? BECAUSE THEY ARE LOSERS IN EVERY SENSE . GOOD JOB.
I liked the addition of Steve because it made the relationship between Brian and Rachel even more complex. Brian is obviously torn between being a good brother while also being in love with Rachel. It was easy for Brian to ignore her all this time while having a girlfriend of his own. Rachel getting involved with Steve made Brian realize that he still had these feelings for Rachel and that they would not go away. As for Rachel having sex with Steve in the same bedroom as Brian, I thought that it just added a voyeurism element to the story. I actually thought that it was pretty hot.
Should make for an interesting third story in how Brian and Rachel will get together despite Steve and Tara. That is if there is a third story. The stories so far really stand their own individually.
First of all, I enjoyed both of your stories! Second, I don't see any reason, why Rachel and Steve couldn't make it together. It's not like Brian an Rachel were a couple or love each other as anything other than sibling, with a "little" forbidden attraction thrown in to make things interesting. I also thought the two of them having sex with her brother in the same room was HOT, obviously he thought so too, inspite of jealousy. Not that he had a right to be jealous; he 1)has a girlfriend and 2)told her that they couldn't be together. I like the way she set him straight on all of that, especially after the way he withdrew from her, earlier. Although, I'm glad Steve didn't walk in on them; that would of been awkward no matter where you intend to take this story next, if anywhere. I hope you decide to continue it. Don't let the critics get you down. Take note of the constructive critism that can make you a better writer and forget the rest!
it was good up until u had Steve having sex with Rachel with Brian in the same room. I mean that is terrible. How could you do that? Steve fucking his roommate's sister while he is sleeping in the next bed...and Rachel fucking her brother's roommate while he is in the room. I hope you dont make Rachel and Steve a couple, because that would ruin everything. I know u may not be going for the happy ending like some authors might do, but it would be really weird if you had Rachel hooking up with Steve. That would make everything really weird.