All Comments on 'Richmond Train'

I would like to give you few suggestions. Break the paragraphs, I mean few of the paragraphs were too big. It should not extend 8-10 lines. Don't jump directly on sex. This is an erotic story site but sex should be part of the story and story should not be a part of sex. You look promising and the story was very good. If possible take help from an editor. I know it's tough to find an editor here, but try getting one. I'm not a grammar police so I don't know any grammartical mistakes. It was fun reading the story, but please give a thought to my suggetions and I hope you don't mind. Anyways, thanks for the story and good luck for your future projets.

Your passionate dame is a great character; raw, demanding, unbridled. The rush to sex was well structured... This wasn't one of those long, laborious build-ups. Sandra needed, wanted, and took Him.

Excellent!