All Comments on 'Rough Tongues and Sharp Teeth Ch. 04'

Wow that was so good, at the end I actualy had tears in my eyes. Please keep up the good work.

chapter of the story. I enjoyed reading this one more than the others due to the lack of spelling errors in it. You did a wonderful job!

please, please, write a next part!!!! i really liked the characters, and the plot line is great

Please proof read your stories out loud or find someone to do so and edit for you. There are a few simple errors that a loud reading or other party could help with. Feral becoming Farel at the beginning of Ivan's part for instance. But instead of butt in the sex scene etc.

On a more content related side. Any used or abused person would not simply accept someone saying they are in love with them, especially not after a single day. Add in the felines instinctual independance and you have the makings of a good few chapters. Build closeness between them. Play off species traits. Feral could use the nest resources to help with his revenge. Using the vampires to help his goals but over time as he tries to exact that revenge, put him and Ivan in danger.

Hopefully you can flesh out more stories in the future. Personally I am bored with vampires and Werewolves and will keep looking for others like the Werepanther here. Good luck.

i am really enjoying your characters and the way you write. I do so hope you take this story further. Many thanks and keep writing.

Simon Oxford UK

Your story is good. But you really need to watch your spelling a lot. You need to check your work for spelling errors very carefully before posting your final work. Write it, re-vamp it, and then write it again and again. Until you have a work that you are completely satisfied with others seeing. Tape Record yourself reading your story to an audience. Then re-wind the tape and listen very closely to what you say. Are the conversations your characters are having with each other believable? Are the dramatic pauses in the right place? Do the words flow? Or do the words stutter and halt the progression of the story. Also did I remember to cross my T's and Dot my I's as they used to say. In other words do people need to have a dictionary next to them to Edit your work before they can even read it? Did I leave any letters out of words. Which you did a lot of ! Is this the right word for the context of this Story and did I put it in the right place? The MAIN THING here is to PROOF-READ BEFORE POSTING ANYTHING !!!!!

not till it's finished ! And this story is far from finished ! Is it not ?

Oh shiiit !! This is sooo frustrating !