Santa Baby

Suzanne swept past him into the room, turned to him, and said, "So, talk."

Jack pulled the door shut behind him and studied her face in the pinkish glow from the tree. She looked cold and impersonal, the familiar twinkle in her eye gone. She folded her arms and jutted one hip out, balancing on the heel of her boot.

"Um," Jack was at a loss. "Look, honey..."

"Don't call me that," Suzanne snapped.

"I call everybody that." Jack was nonplussed.

"Exactly."

"Okay, fine. Look, I wanted to apologize for what happened this morning. I'm really sorry, Suzanne."

"Fine. Apology accepted. Anything else?" she asked.

Jack sighed. "You seem like you're still mad."

"Nope," Suzanne responded. "Not mad. I do have a question for you though."

"Okay."

It was cold in the sunroom, and Suzanne hugged her arms, her stern expression appearing to crumple a bit.

"Do I still have a job?" she asked.

"Of course you do," said Jack.

Suzanne nodded. "Thank you."

"Why would you think otherwise?"

"Never mind. I was just asking." Suzanne said.

As she turned and opened the door, the sounds of the party filtered into the room. She stepped through and closed it, leaving Jack alone in the chill.

When Jack returned to the party a few minutes later, Suzanne was talking to Dave again, their heads close, both of them laughing. He realized he was jealous. It surprised him and angered him because it was his own fault. He watched as another of the sales team, Chaz Pfeiffer, joined Suzanne and Dave, and pulled Suzanne against him in an embrace. Suzanne squealed, and the three of them laughed. Jack felt as if the joke was on him.

He had barely been there an hour, but he could not watch anymore. He found Bill and Patty, made his excuses, saying he had to get back to his own holiday preparations, and left.

At home again, Jack peeled off his clothes and fell into bed, exhausted. He lay there for a while thinking over the day's events. He knew he needed to try to win Suzanne back. At the very least, their working relationship depended on it. At most, his future was at stake. He would have to try to talk to her again.

He had had no idea she had feelings for him, other than friendship and a sort of daughterly regard and caring. The mere knowledge that she wanted more from him had changed his own feelings considerably, he realized. He wanted her. His body ached with it, but he was too tired right then to do anything about it. There was more to it than just physical desire. He wanted just to be with her, to talk to her, to listen to her, to look into those green eyes and see her smile. Jack didn't know how far it would go or how her children would factor into it and didn't care.

His own kids were coming home. Jack smiled. At least this one area of his life was improving. As he drifted toward sleep, his last thought was that it was funny how quickly things could change

Becky arrived at 11:00 the next morning, the trunk of her car filled with a large suitcase, a laundry basket heaped with dirty clothes, and several brightly wrapped gifts. Jack had been sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee, reading the newspaper, when he heard her come in.

"Daddy?" she called.

Jack nearly bumped into her in the hallway, and she leapt into his arms, wrapping her own tightly around his neck.

"Merry Christmas, honey," he said, squeezing his little girl tight and lifting her feet off the floor.

She pulled back, and he set her down.

"Merry Christmas, Dad," said Becky, blinking back tears and smiling at the same time. "God, it's good to be home. You put up the tree!"

Jack felt tears prick his own eyes and fought them.

Clearing his throat, he said, "Well, of course I did! I didn't have time for the rest of that stuff though."

"It's okay," Becky laughed. "Just the tree is great. I like where you put it."

She hugged her father again.

"It's really good to see you, Beck. I didn't expect you this early."

"I couldn't wait to get home. I left at 8:00 this morning."

"Are you hungry?" Jack asked.

"Starved."

"Well, I don't have a lot of food, so we'll have to scrounge today. I'll go to the grocery store tomorrow and load up though," said Jack. "I'm sorry, honey."

"I don't mind, Dad, honest. I'm just happy to be here."

"Great! How about some eggs?"

Jack and Becky spent the next hour chatting comfortably, as Jack prepared a large western omelet and toast, then sat across from Becky as she ate. She told him all about her classes, her friends, and her boyfriend. She reported a small problem with her car, which Jack promised to take care of before she returned to school.

After Becky rinsed her dishes and loaded them into the dishwasher, she said, "Come into the living room and open your presents, Dad."

"Oh, Rebecca," Jack sighed. "I don't have anything for you."

"You sent me money, remember?"

"Yeah, and you turned around and spent it on gifts for everyone else, didn't you?" asked Jack.

"Not all of it," Becky smiled, a lovely blush coloring her cheeks. "Anyway, it was my money to spend, right?"

She grabbed Jack's hand and pulled.

"Well, wait," Jack said. "I was thinking we could have our Christmas when your brother and Amy get here. That way, I'd have time to do some shopping."

Becky looked disappointed for a moment but agreed.

"Let's go into the living room and sit anyway. I want to look at the tree. Will you build a fire?"

Jack built the fire, and he and Becky sat shoulder-to-shoulder on the couch, holding hands and gazing into the flames.

Becky said, "This is so nice," and laid her head on her father's shoulder.

"Very nice," Jack agreed.

"So, tell me about this lady friend of yours."

Jack laughed. "What lady friend?"

"The one you were talking about on the phone. The one you want to date."

When Jack didn't reply, Becky lifted her head and looked at him.

"Dad? It is Suzanne, isn't it?"

She moved away and turned to face him, drawing her legs up and hugging a throw pillow.

"Uh, yeah, I guess it is," Jack said scratching his head. "But I seem to have made a mess of things."

"What happened," Becky asked.

"Honey, I don't think this something I should discuss with you."

"Why not? I'm a grown up now. Who else can you discuss it with?"

Jack sighed. She had a point. He told her what had transpired, leaving out some of the details that he felt wouldn't be appropriate to share. Becky listened without commenting, nodding her head now and then. He finished up with the conversation in the Ritters' sunroom the night before.

"Wow," Becky said. "It sounds like a huge misunderstanding. Do you want me to talk to her?"

"No!" Jack said. "I appreciate the offer, but I think this is something I need to work out for myself."

Becky was quiet for a moment.

"I have an idea," she said, a smile lighting up her face. She stood up and paced back and forth a couple times in front of the fireplace, then stopped in front of Jack.

"When do you go back to work?"

"Tomorrow."

"Jeez, slave driver." Becky giggled.

"I give them two days off for Christmas. They had yesterday and today."

Becky rolled her eyes. "Okay, well listen. You wanted to do some Christmas shopping, right? Ask Suzanne to help you."

"She's pretty mad at me, honey. I don't think she will."

"No, wait. Ask her at work. It'd be pretty hard for her to refuse you there, right?" Becky rubbed her hands together in anticipation. "Tell her you don't know what to get, which is true, right?" She paused, and Jack nodded. "Tell her you really need her help because you don't have anyone else to turn to. She loves being needed. Trust me."

Jack felt a glimmer of hope, a warm little spark in his heart. "Okay, so if I can get her to agree, then what?"

"You be your charming, adorable self. You make it fun. You keep letting her know how much you appreciate it. Then, take her to dinner. You can talk to her then, explain how you feel."

Becky's face was alight with the little conspiracy, her eyes glowing, her dimples showing. She reminded Jack a great deal of Maggie just then, but instead of making him sad, it warmed his heart.

"You can do this, Daddy," Becky said, sitting down and giving Jack a hug.

The next morning, Jack sat at his desk pretending to work for an hour. Nobody bothered him, as many of his employees had taken a vacation day. Suzanne was in the office though and was making a point of avoiding him.

At 9:05, he picked up his phone and called her line.

"Yes, Jack?" Suzanne answered, sounding not at all friendly.

"Could you come in here, Suzanne? I need to talk to you."

"Sure." She hung up.

A moment later she stepped into his office, her eyes wide, her face pale. She looked scared, Jack thought.

"Close the door and have a seat," he said.

Suzanne did as she was told and sat facing Jack across his desk, looking down at her hands folded in her lap. Jack was breathless for a moment, just seeing her again, smelling her scent, remembering. She looked up, then, and he saw no anger in her face, but neither did he see the sparkle.

Jack cleared his throat. "Did you have a good holiday?"

"Yeah, it was nice," Suzanne replied. "You?"

Jack smiled. "Yeah, it was good."

"Good." Suzanne looked down at her hands again.

"I need your help, hon—Suzanne. I know you're still mad at me, but I'm hoping we can move past all that."

"I'm not mad at you."

"Okay, disappointed then. I am sorry, and I hope I'll have a chance to make it up to you some time. Right now, though, I'm asking you to set that aside, because I really need your help."

Suzanne swallowed and licked her lips. "With what?"

Jack's heart was hammering, but he tried to control himself, to appear calm and collected and in command.

"Well, I realized you were right about my kids, so I called them on Christmas Eve. We talked for a while, and it was good. Thank you so much for that." Jack couldn't stop the smile that lit up his face.

"You're welcome," said Suzanne. "I'm happy for all of you."

"Thanks. So the thing is, they're all going to be home on the twenty-eighth, and I wanted to have Christmas with them then. I need to do some shopping, and that's where you come in."

Suzanne simply looked at him, wide-eyed, so Jack continued.

"I could probably wing it with Jackson, but I have no idea what to get for Becky, and especially not Amy. I mean, I don't know her that well. So I was thinking maybe you'd go shopping with me. I'd really, really appreciate it."

"When?" she asked.

"Uh, tomorrow? After work?"

"I'll need to see if I can find a sitter."

"So you'll do it?" Jack exclaimed, feeling excitement and relief and anticipation all at once.

"Yeah, I'll do it if I can find a sitter on such short notice."

"Great! Thank you, Suzanne. Don't worry about a sitter. I have someone in mind."

When Jack and Becky arrived at Suzanne's house the next afternoon, Suzanne squealed as she opened the door and saw Becky. The women hugged for a long moment, as Nicky and Kaylee whooped and pranced around in excitement and dragged Jack away to show off their Christmas gifts. Jack gave Suzanne and Becky a few minutes to catch up. Then he handed Becky a wad of bills to buy pizza for herself and the children, and he and Suzanne headed for the mall.

"I really appreciate you doing this," said Jack in the car during the ride across town.

Suzanne was silent for a moment, then said, "There should be some really great sales now. Do you have anything in mind?"

"Um, not really," Jack said. "Do you?"

Suzanne looked over at him with eyebrows raised. "Well, do you want to get things they need or just fun stuff?"

Jack considered for a moment. "Fun stuff, I think. I want everything to be special."

"Well, I guess we can just walk through the mall. Maybe you'll get some ideas," she said.

That's just what they did. The mall was crowded, which normally would have induced Jack to turn around and go home, but being there in the crowd with Suzanne and all the holiday decorations delighted him. They bought gift baskets for the girls from a bath and body shop and leather jackets for all three kids and a wallet for Jack, Jr. from a leather goods store, which Suzanne picked out. After a few more stops for some smaller items, Jack, who could not carry any more anyway, said he had bought enough. Leaving the mall, they discovered it had started to snow.

After loading up the car, Jack drove to an Irish pub and parked.

"What are we doing here?" Suzanne asked.

"Dinner," replied Jack. "It's the least I can do.

"Oh, you don't have to buy me dinner, and I really should be getting home anyway."

Jack got out and rounded the car to open Suzanne's door.

"You're not taking no for an answer, are you?"

"Uh, nope," Jack smiled.

The interior of the pub was dark and cozy. Pine roping woven with tiny, twinkling lights festooned the doorways and windows, and a lit candle stood on each table. They were seated in a booth by a window with a good view of the falling snow. They both ordered beers and sandwiches and Irish stew.

"This is nice," Suzanne said after the waitress had walked away.

"Yeah, it is," said Jack. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate you doing this."

Suzanne nodded and stared out the window.

Jack watched Suzanne's face shimmer and glow in the candlelight that reflected in her eyes. She had smiled a few times back at the mall, but now she looked sad again.

"You look so pretty in the candlelight," Jack murmured.

Suzanne merely looked at him, then down at her lap.

"Jack," she said, looking back up at him, "if we're going to be friends again I need to tell you something."

Jack shrugged. "Okay."

The waitress returned, set their drinks on the table, and walked away. Jack waited for Suzanne to speak.

"What you said to me about my kids the other day really hurt me," she said.

"I'm so sorry, honey." Jack closed his eyes, realizing what he had called her. "I'm sorry. I know you said not to call you that anymore. It's habit."

"It's okay." Suzanne's eyes teared up a bit, and she dabbed at the inner corners with the tip of her middle finger. "I've never asked you for anything for them. And the thing is, they adore you, Jack."

"I know. The feeling is mutual. I didn't say that to hurt you."

"Then why?" Suzanne asked.

Jack thought for a moment.

"Because I was scared and looking for excuses."

"Scared of what?"

"You, how you make me feel. Also, moving on, letting go of the past, starting over." Jack shrugged. "All of it."

"I shouldn't have pushed you, Jack," Suzanne sighed. "But that's another thing. I'm not usually so aggressive. I knew you'd never do it, so, I put myself out there, made the first move. You weren't ready. You're not attracted to me, but you let me go on and make an ass of myself."

"Honey, I never said I wasn't attracted to you," said Jack.

"Yes, you did."

"No, I didn't. You said it. I just didn't disagree." Jack reached across the table for Suzanne's hand and squeezed it. "I think you're beautiful and smart and funny, and I'm very attracted to you."

Suzanne couldn't hide her smile. "I don't know what to say."

She didn't have to say anything else because their food arrived just then. Their conversation during the meal was easy and light, and Jack was relieved. Suzanne's sparkle was back.

Snow was still falling as they pulled into Suzanne's driveway. Jack parked and shut off the engine, but neither of them moved to get out of the car.

"Why does this feel like a date all of a sudden?" Suzanne asked.

Jack laughed. "You're kinda slow sometimes, but I like you anyway."

"Yeah, well, you're kinda sneaky sometimes, but I like you too," said Suzanne.

"So." Jack hesitated. "Since this is a date, does that mean I get a kiss when I walk you to the door?"

"Only one way to find out," Suzanne replied.

Jack got out of the car and went around to open the passenger door. He was suddenly nervous as a teenager on his first date. He reached for Suzanne's hand as she was getting out of the car. Neither of them let go as they walked up the steps to the front door. They stood facing each other on the stoop, the light above the door shining down and casting shadows on their faces. Snow continued to fall, the large flakes dusting their hair and shoulders.

"Thanks, Suzanne," Jack said. "It's been really fun."

"You're welcome, and thank you, too."

A particularly large flake fluttered down and was caught by Suzanne's eyelashes, causing her to blink. They both laughed. Leaning down, Jack touched his lips to Suzanne's in a light, sweet kiss, then pulled back slightly, as her breath fanned his face. Suzanne placed her free hand on his chest, inside his open jacket and tipped her chin up to be kissed again. Jack caught her lower lip between his own briefly, then let it go, as she parted her lips, allowing his tongue to slip between. Just as the kiss deepened, they heard the lock on the door slide open.

"Damn," Jack whispered, and they both chuckled, moving apart.

Becky swung the door open and exclaimed, "I thought I heard you pull in!"

At home later that evening, Jack spent a couple hours wrapping his gifts. He had not done much wrapping before because Margaret always took care of it, but he found he enjoyed it. The packages weren't perfect, as they would have been if she had wrapped them, but Jack thought they looked very nice.

It was late by the time he placed them under the tree with Becky's gifts. The sight of the lighted tree with all the packages underneath made Jack smile. He wished again that he could share it with Suzanne and thank her for helping him. It was too late to call, though, so he made a mental note to thank her in the morning.

Right before lunch the next day, Jack received a call from Mike Burroughs, a friend at the Chamber of Commerce. He had a couple of extra tickets for their New Years Eve party at the Peyton Grand Hotel downtown. As a member, Jack was being offered the chance to purchase them. He wondered if it was too late to invite Suzanne. Surely, she would have made other plans already. He decided to take a chance and purchased the tickets.

Suzanne had already left for lunch, so he couldn't ask her then, and he was leaving for the day to celebrate Christmas with his children.

He arrived home a half hour later to find Jack, Jr. and Amy already there, more packages under the tree, and the delicious aroma of lasagna, Becky's specialty, filling the house. Christmas music played on the stereo, and there was a festive feeling in the air. Jack's gifts were a great success. Even Amy had hugged Jack hard, saying this was one of the happiest Christmases she could remember.

Late in the afternoon, they all watched It's a Wonderful Life together, munching on popcorn and Christmas cookies and drinking wine and hot cocoa.

Jack finally found a free moment and snuck upstairs to his study and closed the door. He was breathless as he dialed Suzanne's number.

"Suzy Q?" he said when she answered.

"Jack! I was just thinking about you. How's it going?"

"Great. It's been a really nice day. The kids loved their gifts," Jack replied. "Thank you, again."

"You're welcome, again. I'm happy for you."

"The reason I'm calling is that I got tickets for the Chamber of Commerce New Years Eve party, and I know it's short notice, but I was wondering if you'd like to go with me," Jack said, happy to have finally gotten it out.

"Oh. I already have plans. I'm sorry, Jack." Suzanne sounded disappointed.

"That's okay." Jack's heart sunk. She had a date? "I knew it was a long shot, being so late and all."

"I'm sorry," Suzanne repeated.