Secret Agent Man

*****

Mary stared at the huge pile of paperbacks that she had received from the bookstore. By staying away from the "bodice ripper" romances, the number of returns had been kept to a minimum and she was quite happy with what she had. Jim walked into the library workroom and after looking around, kissed her. "How's it going?" he asked, looking at all the books on the table.

"OK, but slow. Each book needs a catalogue card and a checkout card and they all have to be typed out and that takes time but it's OK, a necessary task to get them on the shelves. How was your day?"

"It was fine. Next week is bread day, again. I can't wait to see what this new group of students come up with. So far, there haven't been any troublemakers, either, thank God."

"I have a gift for you when we come home. It's just a little something I picked up the other day and when I saw it, I knew that it was for you."

"Now, you've got me very interested. Not telling?"

"No, you'll have to wait." Mary laughed. "You're just a big kid."

"This weekend I'd like to take the Challenger up the coast."

"Cool. That'll be fun. How far?"

"Maybe Ventura, stopping for lunch. I was thinking of giving Sandra the Malibu for when she goes to college and we can use the other car to go to work. How does that sound?"

"Very generous of you. I know how much you like that car."

"Well, this way, you can drive and I can sleep." He laughed and folded her into his arms. "Have you thought about getting a TA to help with all this bookwork?"

"It's too late for this year but maybe next year. I thought of asking Sandra but she's taking that night class at El Camino and I don't want to burden her with extra work; she's got enough to do already. I saw a course catalog from UCLA in her room the other day. I wonder if she's changed her mind about Loyola."

"She's got to make up her own mind what to do; we can only support her decision. UCLA is a good school, it's just a long drive up the freeway."

*****

Later that evening, Jim asked Sandra what her plans were about college and she finally told her parents that she was going to go to El Camino for two years and then finish at UCLA for her degree. While Jim had wanted her to go to Loyola, he understood that it was her decision and at $13,000 the financial impact would be a good deal less.

"You're not mad, are you?" Sandra asked, afraid that her parents would be angry.

"No, sweetheart, it's fine. You can have the Malibu to go to school. I'm impressed that you're doing so well at Camino. At the rate you're going, you'll be done at least a semester early."

"Thank you. I'm trying my best to make you proud of me."

*****

That weekend, Jim and Mary took the Challenger up Pacific Coast Highway toward Ventura, stopping there for lunch at Lure Fish House, Jim having the Sea Bass and Mary the lobster ravioli. He wished he could have some ice tea but had given it up earlier when it was affecting his sleep. They shared a cobbler for dessert.

"This is really good," Mary said, tasting her dish. "Here, try some." She put her fork forward.

"Oh, yes, this is really good. I wish this place was closer to LA. Sixty miles is a long way to go to lunch."

"You didn't have a problem with driving to 150 miles to Solvang and that's past Santa Barbara."

"I guess you're right. Just depends on how you feel at the moment."

"Do you think Bill will break Sandra's heart like Joe did?"

"I hope not. He seems to have his head on his shoulders. And, he wants to be a biologist... can't be all bad."

"Very funny; I'm trying to be serious here." She looked at him.

"I'm sorry, you're right. I think it'll be OK. I hope so."

*****

It wasn't long before his students were looking at bread mold through the stereoscopic microscopes, the black fuzzy organisms spread throughout the bread. "Make sure," he said, "that you don't get the mold on the scopes or we'll have to stay late to clean them." He had a bottle of alcohol just for that purpose.

Some of the students had some other molds intermixed with the Rhizopus mold, the light green colors contrasting with the black.

"Mr. Cravens? All these molds are in the air?"

"Yes, Sally, that's right. That's how bread gets moldy when you leave it out. Make sure that you all wash your hands before you leave the lab."

Ten minutes before class was over the students began to clean up their work stations and Jim walked around the room making sure that everything had been put away for the next class to use.

"Don't forget," he said, "that there's a test this Monday."

At the same time, Mary was checking out books for the Senior English class, helping the few who had never visited the library find what they were looking for. The school newspaper staff had done a story on the new books, hoping to drum up interest as well as all the experiments in the Biology class.

Soon it was lunchtime and Jim came down to the library to see his wife. "How's it going?" he asked, seeing the large group of students still in the room.

"It's going. Thanks to Mrs. Zindel, there's been plenty of customers today. I hope that the younger students also get the bug to read; I've gotten in plenty of exciting books for them."

"The school candy drive is coming up in two weeks. Please remind me to bring plenty of money so that I can buy from my students. We can always give them out for Halloween."

"Yeah, right, like you won't eat them all before then."

"Well, excuse me!" He laughed but then said, "I'm serious, though, about the money."

The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch and Jim walked back to his lab, finding his sixth period class waiting for him at the door. He unlocked the lab and stepped aside as the thirty students entered the large room and found their places, getting to work focusing the scopes to their eyes.

Soon, they were diagramming what they saw, excited at the bread mold's hidden secrets. Before they left the class, he reminded them to see the Youtube film about fermentation that night.

Finally, the day came to an end and he was watching the last class clean up the lab, the moldy bread going into a heavy trash bag while his TA wiped down each microscope with alcohol. The microscopes were eventually put into the storeroom and locked away in their cabinet. Jim wished there was a better, more secure room for the scopes but had to live with what he had.

'Is there anything else you need?" asked Philip, the TA.

Jim looked around the room. "No, thanks, everything looks good. I'll see you tomorrow."

He was going to take Mary to the Hacienda Hotel that evening for swing dancing as a surprise. They had never gone dancing in the year they had been married and he thought it would be a nice thing to do.

*****

"Dancing? Oh, that's so romantic," she said, getting out of the car and walking with him into the hotel.

It wasn't very long before they were dancing, moving around the dance floor to the sound of the music. He held her hand as they swung around and around, twirling, twirling, twirling.

Two hours later, they left to go home, very happy with their evening out on a school night. "That was a lot of fun," Mary said, still breathing heavily.

"I'm glad that you liked it. We could do it more if you want."

"Yes, I'd like that, very much. What made you decide to go dancing?"

"It was just something we hadn't done, that's all."

"I enjoyed it very much; it was fantastic." She put her hand on his as he made the turn onto El Segundo Blvd, heading east back home and bypassing the heavy evening traffic on Rosecrans.

Soon, they were home again and found Sandra watching television with Bill. The two were quietly talking, not really paying attention to the show.

Bill stood up. "Good evening, sir," he said politely. "It's nice to see you again."

"Hello, Bill. How are you?" The two shook hands.

"I'm fine, thank you. We were just talking about UCLA." Bill sat down again.

"Yes, I see that that's been a change in what we thought Sandra was going to do."

"We're hoping on carpooling to the university to save on gas and, well, you know."

"I suppose I do. Have you had anything to eat? I can order a pizza or we could go out."

"Thank you but I really have to get going, I have an early class tomorrow." Bill moved to the front door, giving Sandra a kiss goodbye as he left the house. Sandra watched him walk down the driveway to his car and waved one last time as he drove away.

Mary was glad that Sandra had found another boyfriend after getting her heart broken. "So, what's new?" she asked her daughter, sitting down on the sofa and turning off the television.

"Oh, nothing, we were just talking about going to UCLA together. I know you thought I was going to Loyola but this is better. I just wish the drive wasn't as far as it is. But it'll be OK, the two of us going together, you know?" Sandra moved to the hall door. "I'm going to bed, now. Good night."

"Well, that was quick," said Jim. "I thought she'd stay up a bit later, it's only ten o'clock."

"I hope that she hasn't done something that can't be fixed," Sandra's mother said, afraid that her daughter might be pregnant.

"I think she'll be OK. She's smart and has a plan for her future. I don't think she'll do anything to jeopardize that." He didn't like the worry on his wife's face.

*****

The rest of the school year passed quietly with no surprises and Sandra easily passed her classes with As except for her French class which had her still getting a B. She accepted it with a smile, knowing you couldn't win them all. She put her attention to the summer session at El Camino, taking four more of her general requirement classes that would easily transfer to UCLA.

Mary went to the high school three days a week to enter the new books into the inventory and Jim went with her to feed his animals and do maintenance on the lab aquariums. She soon had him typing in the information, getting the work done in half the time. In the background, oldies were playing on the internet. Mary hummed along with the Stone Poneys.

Mary and Jim worked together well; he had no problems with taking direction from her. In three weeks, all the books had been entered into the system and she was ready for the new year. It was Sandra's senior year and they were planning a party for her when she graduated. Bill had already started UCLA and called her every evening about what he had done at the university.

*****

Mid-August arrived and the high school year started again. Sandra had an easy time of it because she had already taken her Physics class at El Camino and transferred the credit back to the high school. She used the open period to prepare for her SAT exam and was working for a scholarship to UCLA. She finally scored 780 and 785 on the two sections and was glad that the test was over. She just had to wait and see if they were good enough for acceptance since the university was one of the hardest to get into.

By the time spring arrived, she had received the large packet for admission as well as a cover letter informing her that she had been awarded a scholarship for the four years. Sandra held the letter in her hands, tears in her eyes, grateful to God that she had succeeded. All that hard work had paid off. She sat down on her bed, supporting herself with her other hand.

That afternoon, she showed the letter to Mary and Jim who both clapped in appreciation for what she had accomplished. "Congratulations," they said, "this deserves a fine dinner out. We can go out Saturday. Would you like to invite Bill?"

"Yes, please," Sandra answered, glad that he had been accepted by her parents.

Graduation was only a few weeks away and now she was looking forward to it more than ever.

*****

"Turn this way," Jim said, snapping another picture with his camera. "That's the way, good." Snap, snap, snap... one picture after another went into the camera's memory until he was satisfied that he had captured that special look he wanted, knowing he would get it "blown up" to sixteen by twenty at Walmart.

"Looks good," he said, "so you can change now and hang it all up. Tomorrow's the big day." His own graduation for his Master's degree was a few days away but he was more worried about getting Sandra through hers.

Mary looked at her daughter, wishing that Sandra's father could have lived and seen his daughter excel as she had done. It was the only sadness she had in her life and as much as she loved Jim, there was that emptiness that was in the back of her mind and would probably always be there, she thought, no matter what happiness Jim and she had.

She turned to her husband who was showing Sandra the pictures he had taken with his camera and wiped a tear from her eye, the only reminder that not everything was as perfect as she would have hoped.

"Are you all right?" he asked, seeing that she had been crying.

"I'll be OK, it's just that... don't worry, I'll be OK." Mary wiped another tear from her face and smiled just a bit, not wanting to ruin the moment for the two looking at her.

"You're thinking of him, aren't you?" Jim asked.

She said nothing but then burst into tears as he held her to him. "It's all right," he said, giving her a tender kiss, wishing away her tears as he did.

"I'm sorry," she said, not wanting to explain and remaining quiet in his arms, feeling that she was ruining their relationship.

Jim didn't know what to do other than hold her, feeling it was something she would have to work out for herself if she truly loved him. For some reason, Skeeter Davis echoed in the back of his mind, love songs for the brokenhearted.

"Let's all go to the cemetery, now and get it off your heart. Come on, Sandra, Mary, let's go."

The drive to the Culver City cemetery took more than a half-hour with the afternoon traffic grinding everything to a slow pace but they finally arrived and as he drove the car to where her first husband was buried, he could see out of the corner of his eye the grief she was feeling. He parked the car and then walked with the two to the grave site.

Mary knelt down on the grass and made the sign of the Cross. Tears came down her face as she looked at the grave stone. "I'm so sorry you're not here," she began, "and I miss you more than anything." Sobs were next, breaking up her voice as she tried to speak. "I love Jim, he's a good man and it doesn't mean I love you any less. It's been hard on him and I've got to stop so please forgive me."

Jim put his hand on her shoulder, wishing to give her strength and alleviate her misery there in the late afternoon. He waited until he was sure that she was finished speaking to her late husband and helped her up. "Do you want to leave some flowers?" he asked, prepared to walk to the flower shop up the hill.

"No." She leaned into him. "I'm sorry."

"No," he replied, "it's something that was a long time coming, that's all. You'll be OK, you'll see. I love you and Sandra needs you."

At the mention of her name, Sandra hugged her mother, saddened that the older woman was in such pain. "Mom..." It was more a plea for calm than anything else.

Jim took out a handkerchief and gently wiped away Mary's tears sorry to see the woman he loved expressing such sorrow. He refused to let her go and held her tightly in his arms, feeling that if he let her go she would disappear forever.

"I'm OK," she finally said, her arms dropping to her sides, signaling an end to her visit to the grave. "I want to go home now," she quietly said, almost in a whisper.

"Are you sure?" he asked, wanting to give her all the time in the world.

"Yes."

*****

It was quiet that evening and the television was off. Sandra was in her room talking to a friend on the phone while her parents were in the living room just sitting there, holding hands. "I'm sorry," she said, again.

"Stop apologizing," he answered, "I understand."

She put her head on his shoulder. "I do love you."

"I know. I love you, too, and always will. Are we going to have a party for Sandra? Probably should have asked before now."

"Could it just be here? We could grill steaks or get chicken or something."

"Sure, we could do that... maybe a week or two after graduation so that it wouldn't interfere with other people's plans. Let's ask her."

Mary got up and walked to Sandra's room, knocking on the door. "Sandra," she said, opening the door, finding her daughter fast asleep. She closed the door.

"She's asleep. It's been hard on her, too. I should have thought of that, poor girl."

"If we're going to have chicken, I'll need to make, what would you call it, reservations, at Kentucky Fried Chicken. That would probably be better because I can't grill enough steaks at one time to take care of whoever will come."

"There's her grandparents but I don't think they'll be able to come out from Jersey."

"I'll send them the tickets, how's that? Who else?"

"I don't know who her friends are, some from the high school and some from Camino. Maybe twenty people, what do you think?"

"Probably right, but there's the neighbors, can't forget them."

*****

Graduation came with Sandra getting four awards for excellence, her French grades keeping her from getting the Valedictorian spot. She took it in good spirits, knowing that she had already gotten almost a year out of the way in her college classes.

After the ceremony, Jim took them, including Bill and his parents, to Greenfield in Long Beach. The Brazilian steakhouse served all you can eat dinners with the meats brought to your table and sliced from long skewers.

"Don't fill up on the salad bar until you've had the steaks," Jim warned everyone, knowing what was coming as he turned the colored indicator up. It wasn't long before the meat arrived, the various offerings coming and coming and coming.

The Fullertons were impressed with the restaurant, never having come to one before and thoroughly enjoying themselves.

Mr. Fullerton, who insisted everyone call him Jack, praised Sandra for her awards and said that they were looking forward to the graduation party. He was proud of his own son and said that he was glad the two of them would be going to UCLA together in the fall.

When the meal was finally over, both parents wished farewells and made the journey back to Hawthorne.

The next morning, Sandra slept in late, not having to get up early for the first time in years. She was still going to take four more classes that summer at Camino, including Journalism at Jim's advice to bolster her writing skills, something he had done himself years before.

Jim and Mary went to the diner for breakfast, celebrating in their own way, Jim wanting to make sure that Mary was feeling better after her sad breakdown at the cemetery.

"How are you feeling?" he gently asked.

"I'm better, thank you... for your love and support. I'm sorry that I caused you such grief at the cemetery. I didn't mean to, it just was..."

"Don't worry about it. That's what love is all about... how's your breakfast?"

"Don't change the subject. I made you sad, I know that, and I'm sorry, and my breakfast is fine."

Jim laughed and she smiled, looking like Mona Lisa. "Are you still giving the Malibu to Sandra?"

"Yes, I am. I'm going to buy a Corvette... a used one, but a Corvette just the same."

"My goodness, that's a surprise. Are you sure? Do you know what year?"

"Yes, a 2004. I already talked with the owner about it and it's only going to be about $15,000 which is a good deal. It's cheaper than a '66."

"So, I suppose you're going to buy a Corvette jacket to go with it?"

"No, I'm going to buy two jackets... one for me and one for you."

"Well, in that case! What color?"

"The car? Black. The jackets? Black."

"Wow, I don't know what to say. Are we going to join a Corvette club?"