Seeking Twilight Ch. 03

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He screamed into her mouth as blood gushed down their faces. He slammed his free fist into her kidneys . . . And lost his tongue. He pushed away from her and screamed, blood spewing and spraying from the stump in his mouth. She defiantly spit his tongue at him. He approached her, hand raised, ready to knock her senseless. She shut her eyes, and then, immediately after hearing a dull thud, felt his body collapse against hers, and then fall to the ground. She opened her eyes, hoping to see her would-be rescuer, and was, instead, caught across the temple by the flat side of a crow bar.

Heather awoke unable to move. She was laying on her back in an alley, her arms bound together over her head and tied down, her legs bound and tied down the same way. She rag that had been duct taped into her mouth was making it hard to breath. She was facing straight up and her arms were making it hard to see anything to either side other than a violet glow. As if this wasn't enough to terrify her beyond human comprehension and sanity, she could here a man's voice muttering nearby, and she could only make out part of what he was saying, ". . . who art in . . . be thy . . . Kingdom come . . . Will . . . Us this day . . . Forgive us . . . As we . . . Against . . ."

Heather couldn't think. She was consumed with fear. She radiated it. She was broken, and she panicked. She struggled against the ropes and she screamed into the rag, none of which did any good. What it did do was attract the attention of the mumbling man, who yelled at Heather from where he was, "NOT YET!" and then went back to whatever he was doing, " . . . lead us not . . . Deliver Us From EVIL . . . Kingdom . . . And the . . . Amen"

Tears streamed down Heather's face, desperately pleading to God that he strike down this monster before he had a chance to do whatever he was planning. The man knelt down beside her, a cup in one hand. He dipped two fingers in the cup, which then glowed with the same violet hue that bathed the alley.

"In the name of the father," he said, as Heather felt him draw a line down her forehead.

"And of the son," he said, crossing the line with another across her forehead.

"and of the Holy spirit," he said, drawing another cross over her heart.

"Amen"

He set down the cup. Heather's whole body trembled. The man picked up the crowbar from where he had laid it, and lined up the long end with the cross over her heart. He gripped it with both hands, and as he lifted it above his head, Heather shut her eyes as tight as she could.

"May god have mercy on your soul"

The pain was unbearable as the crowbar broke its way through Heather's breastplate and plunged into her heart. Blood flooded her lungs, her stomach, her throat, and her mouth and nose. Her eyes opened, and she watched briefly as the stars and the purple hue around her faded to black

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AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
interesting

I'm very curious to find out how this one ends. Something you should watch is the quotations around dialogue, there was a couple times where you missed them. About the only thing I don't like about your story is that you introduce too many characters. Is that Po... guy important to the plot? If not, we probably didn't need to know his first and last name. But other than those few things, I think you have a great premise here, and I can't wait for the next chapter :)

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