by thundersglory
How about an encore. Your story ended a tad too soon for my tastes. You left one hell of a cliffhanger right when the tension was building. ~Harlequin
Writing gets stronger with practice. This was a good first effort. I agree with first comment-continue from here. What happens next? What happens when she finds out who it is? Or will she find out? Maybe he takes her several times in secret and still pursues her in the open. How will she change? If you choose to continue, just keep her basic personality in mind. Becoming more confident and open would be realistic, becoming a total cock whore wouldn't be. Thanks for writing. Look forward to more.
I like Liz with her shy demeanor and her secret desires. She's an interesting character. I hope you keep writing.
I loved the story although there is part of me that is pretending they actually had been talking for a while & he found these things out through consensual means. only other thing was spelling & grammar, but I was able to ignore it after a bit