by Balrog
Since I knew from your email that it would be a happy ending, and I said I'd read it til the end, I almost stopped reading on page 2, then thinking of how Kim was acting, it just wasn't her and finished reading it. I am glad it was a nightmare and they both realised it wasn't what they wanted.
Yeah, the 'dream' bit is a bit of a cliche, but it was still an awesome way for you to end this great story of yours. Loved reading it from start to finish. I can't wait for your next story.
Read each one as you put them up and was waiting in anticipation of the next one. Have been reading on this site for years and this is the first time I have commented but you took me along a road and I have enjoyed coming to the end of it. Look forward to the next one.
Martin
While the dream aspect is a bit cliche, it enabled the author to let the characters confront their own worst fears. Dave didn't want to lose sweet Kim to being a slut. Kim was terrified of Dave confusing lust with love, and losing him to his own inexperience. And so the dreams, ah, the dreams. It worked for me. Good series, well written.
That was great. I loved this whole series, and I really liked the twists in it, because they made the story interesting!
Sick ending. I almost listed you as my favorite author. Almost. Granted, the story was a bit like a "love story" written by a fantasizing young girl, it never-the-less was a beautifully crafted story. The plot was well designed, the language was perfect, the grammar was excellent and it was most enjoyable. I kept waiting for that other shoe to drop and those delightful people to suffer the typical set-backs.
It was disastrous! You made my love for both of those sweet kids turn sour in my mind. The hokey dream farce only made it worse.
Sorry,
de Jay
dlj13@bellsouth.net
This is a long great story. Don't ever give up writing, balrog. I will keep waiting for your coming piece of writing.
please i beg you these two are an amazing couple and are exceptionally easy to relate to
she was being piledriven and he was failing in love with another. and they awoke in each others arms. One of the damnist twists. I figured she was going to be a slut and he was going the live and love Cindy. and then they wake up from a dream. that was slick. Didn't see that coming. of course 5.
To be honest, I was so pissed at first. I could barely stand to read it. Then, it was revealed that this was all a dream. And I thought to myself, "You bastard." (directed at the author.) But, you're not a bastard. You've wrote the best story I've ever read. Thank you for sharing this with all of us, even if you did scare us all with that dream.
Relatively new here, so finding older treasures. The dream sequence was a masterpiece.
Over the first 8 chapters I fell in love with Kim. When she asked about the swap I lost interest. When you wrote about the swap o began to despise her. Even the ending could not save her. Sorry you crushed my vision of this beautiful girl.
You are a great writer to draw me in like that, but you crushed my image of her in the end.
about 3 different times, the story line had me so conflicted. Great job, You kept me on edge throughout.
I'm an old romantic. Your characters are unabashedly romantic and beautiful. I know those same loving feelings. Thank you for the sexy ride.
...feel-good love story. The dream bit was shockingly hurtful and the denouement was a welcome relief, as I thought we were headed for an unhappy ending. Five well-earned stars.