All Comments on 'Stories with Cousin Kate Ch. 02'

You seriously need an editor or proof reader to look at your stories. The story was hard to follow because of miss spelled words and wrong usage of verbs.

misspelled

That was a nice second chapter that you wrote about Kate and Adam. I liked this story because you were able to take Kate and never tell Adam the story about her and Sarah. She told the story quite well about how Sarah had gotten two boys from the dorm to come over and fuck her wildly. There were some misspellings but nothing that bad. I wish people would stop using anonymously when they have criticisms about the story and put their name on the e-mail and take responsibility for their criticisms.

When you say it was misspelled do you mean that I used the wrong words because that is a likely consequence of me not reviewing it, but I typed it in Microsoft Word and the spell check came back clear. Just looking for ways to improve chapter 3.

Another anon who thinks you need an editor:

1. "Another picture would do" in Line 2 doesn't make much sense. Word choice issue. Spell check won't catch this.

2. "Draw" appears instead of "drawer" three times in the first paragraph. Spell check won't catch this.

3. The second paragraph is clunky-a detailed description of the drawer search, and the closet, a generally more detailed, less organized place gets half a sentence. If he knew the best, simple way of getting a picture of Sarah was on the internet, why'd he go to her room first? That the house had no wireless internet is irrelevant to the rest of the story-why'd you include it? "Loaded up the internet" isn't a good phrase either.

I'd run through the other paragraphs, but I hope you get the idea. I still enjoyed your story, and will probably read its sequels (assuming there are such things), but your writing would benefit from an editor and/or a very careful re-read before posting.

I really like the spirit of the story. Some good sex scenes and overall tone and pacing is good.

However, lack of editing really does detract from the story. For example "She whispered in his hear" and the constant use of "grinded" instead of "ground". You've really got the makings of a nice story line here and I'm looking forward to see how it goes, but you definitely need a editor or at least a proof reader.

I would like to thank everyone who left me advice and I am glad to hear that you enjoy the story so far. Number 3 should be on its way in a few days and it should have less typos.

way to much teasing, that kind of teasing is not sexy or romantic it is painful. no guy would put up with her he would tell her to go to hell and avoid her going as far as to find somewhere else to sleep. subpar at best trash is more like it.