All Comments on 'Subtitles'

The ending is what sold me on this one. Sure, you wrote a wonderfully descriptive scene of the seduction and a nice engaging account of the two of them enjoying themselves and each other....but honestly, this is Literotica, and I can probably point you to dozens of stories where that is the case.

The ending, however, is a stroke of genius.

When Sophie/Sophia (you use both spellings here and there) says "I was getting tired of flirting," the shocked expression on Nina's face could practicly be FELT. She had picked up on no hints or signals at all, despite desperately wishing for them, and so the mystery becomes was she 1) so oblivious that she didn't miss the rather obvious hints, or 2) was Sophie/Sophia simply not being direct enough in her attempts to show interest.

Either way, I was greatly amused because it just goes to show how different some people's definitions of flirting can be from others. What you might THINK is a clear signal doesn't always go through if the reciever is trying to pick up something else ;)

Loved the idea of this story, loved the characters, nice ending. However, there were so many grammatical errors and verb tense agreement problems that it was distracting. This is a good draft of what could have been a great story.

Those who don't write have no idea of how much time and effort go into crafting a good story. By the time one has finished and edited and edited again, a writer is too tired to edit again just to satisfy the nit pickers among you. Particularly when one considers the PAY. Linyari is learning the craft and learning well

It's short, it's cute and it has all it needs. I like it!

Very enjoyable.