Swapped Ch. 01

"STOP!" That man screamed. Kris took a deep breath. It seemed like the air was literally infused with the terror of the man he was holding. It was the most euphoric feeling he could imagine and it was all around. "DON'T!" He shrieked again. It only made Kris twist harder. He didn't stop until a loud snap informed him the man's wrist was broken. Instead of stopping there Kris pulled the man's arm out straight and brought free hand down like a hammer on his elbow bending it the wrong direction and smiling at the same time. Then in a move that required far more flexibility than he should have been capable of he brought his foot up and slammed it against That Man's skull steadily applying more and more pressure. He was running on pure savage instinct without any clue what he expected to happen. "NO!" The man managed to squeal before his shoulder was dislocated and Kris released him.

"Stop. Don't. No." Kris's body vibrated with pleasure. "I'm sorry; I couldn't quite hear you over the sound of me kicking your ass."

"Kristina!"

Kris raised a brow at the voice that seemed to come from nowhere then turned his focus back to the man who as slowly backing towards the window cradling his broken and useless limb. "Do you know how many bones there are in the human body?" The man's red eyes shifted to blue and widened slightly. Even though only his arm was hurt the man was limping towards the window. "You don't know? Neither do I. What I do know is your skull," he tapped the side of his head for emphasis, "isn't actually a single bone. It's a bunch of bones that fuse together after birth and you also have three tiny little ones in your ear called the hammer, the anvil and the stirrup." The smile that carved itself into Kris's features rivaled anything the beast before him had given. "I wonder if I can break those."

"KRISTINA!" The voice was closer and louder this time but it still didn't come from anywhere.

"WHAT?!" Kris roared in response. There was no answer though, no acknowledgement of all. Before he had time to think about it too long his attention was called to the window where his victim was trying to escape. He was using his good arm to haul himself through the portal but it was a little small for a full grown man. "Are you trying to get away?" Kris stalked across the room like a predator and grabbed the man's ankle dragging him back through the window. When he had the man inside the room he dangled him upside down with surprising ease. He actually wasn't sure how he was managing but he really didn't care as he readied for a kick intended to shatter the man's ribs.

"KRISTINA ALLYSON ROSE! YOU GET UP RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!"

Suddenly Kris was the two things he hated most in life. He was cold and wet. He sat up startlingly fast in his wondering where he was, why he was wet, why he was cold, why there was a small herd of stuffed animals in the bed beside him, why he had a poster of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson on his wall with an incredibly sexy eyebrow quirked just so and who this mildly attractive blond standing over him with an empty mug was.

"You're going to be late if you don't get moving Kristina." The woman said in a matter of fact tone that left no room for questions.

That was unfortunate because Kris's first battery of questions were still unanswered when a new batch bombarded his brain. His brain suddenly felt at least two sizes too large for his head but of all the questions flooding his mind there was just one at the forefront that drown out all the others with its insistent repetition.

Why was he a woman?

WHY was HE a WOMAN?!

Seriously. WHY THE FUCK WAS HE A WOMAN?!?!

"You okay?" The blonde woman asked. Kris tried to focus on her face for a moment trying to figure out why the woman looked strangely familiar. "You know if you're late again Ramon is gonna fire your ass."

Kris closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I must have drank a fuck ton. I having some kind of crazy dream and it'll be just fine." Kris thought sliding out of bed. "My feet are so small, look at em." Kris wriggled his toes for a second noticing they were painted emerald green as well. "Cute." He'd meant to sound sarcastic, in his head, but he found he meant it.

"I'm fine Tina." There was no explanation for why Kris knew her name but he was certain that was her name. "Just a bit of a headache." He continued.

Sara looked a bit concerned then shook her head. "Well go hop in the shower, I'll get breakfast going. Did Martin ever call you back?"

"My boyfriend." Kris thought warmly. Just the thought of that handsome golden brown devil brought a smile to his lips. Kris could even imagine Martin's strong arms wrapping around him and gently kissing his cheek.

The warm flame that had been building in his belly suddenly went ice cold when Kristina remembered why he'd been drinking the night before. She'd been drinking because that prick Martin couldn't be bothered to stay on the phone for while she complained about her job. Just listening to his voice made her feel better at the end of a long day. He didn't even really have to talk. Just having Martin sit on the other end of the phone listening to her gripe about her day let her know that she wasn't alone. Except that dick couldn't be bothered to listen to her and it wasn't even like he had any place to go. He just wanted to play his stupid zombie survival game. The one he couldn't be bothered teaching her to play because then he'd have one less place he could go to escape her.

"No." Kris barely trusted his voice not to break.

Sara looked like she wanted to frown but she stopped herself and rolled her eyes. "You know he's an idiot but he means well." Kris couldn't clearly remember who this Sara person was just yet but she really wasn't a good liar. She certainly didn't think nearly as highly of Martin as Kristina did.

It had been so long since the last time he'd cried that the feeling itself was foreign. He fought the sudden urge to reach out and grab an oddly comforting looking bear dressed up like a gangster and instead walked to the bathroom.

"I sleep like this?" Kristina said aloud examining her reflection. His hair was pulled into what he could only describe as a knot on the back of his head. "I wonder how long my hair is." With a hesitant frown Kris let down his hair and watched as it fell just his, her, whatever just below the reflection's shoulders. Kris's hair was straight, probably straightened since he was a couple shades lighter but still a chocolate delight, and it was also a shade of not quite blonde that didn't look natural either. It wasn't a bad look though. He could easily get used to the big green doe eyes staring back at him. Actually for having just rolled out of bed Kristina was a damn pretty woman.

Kris peeled the faded undershirt off taking a moment to savor the decidedly masculine scent trapped in its fibers and his mind wandered to Martin. Martin with his strong muscular arms and firm chest. Martin with his distracting smile and deep baritone voice. The mere thought of Martin made Kristina's lips curl into a happy smile and the memory of his strength caused a slightly different if oddly familiar sensation.

"You've got to be fucking kidding." Kris grumbled. "I don't even know this Martin person and while he seems like a handsome enough gentlemen I don't swing that way." The insistent throbbing just below his hips, her hips, goddamn being gender bent was fucking confusing! The important part was Kris knew he was tying to convince himself that he wasn't hoping that Martin would call before it was time to go to work at Vons.

Kris finished undressing and pulled himself into the shower as a new battery of questions started in. He was okay, for the moment, with the fact that he was apparently a fairly attractive female. Kristina lived with Sara who unlike in real life apparently hadn't become a total bitch after her parents got divorced in third grade, or maybe they hadn't gotten divorced, or maybe Kristina wasn't as much of a prick as Kris. It didn't matter, they were friends and right now Sara was starting breakfast. Why was the thought of Martin almost magical? Why was he even dreaming this? Why was it so hard to think about anything but Martin?!

After trying spending a moment trying to sort his thoughts Kris gave in. He wasn't going to be able to think straight until he got rid of that ache. The warm water beating down on his sensitive nipples forced him to whimper. Kris closed his eyes and allowed his surprisingly soft hands to glide over the feminine form he was currently locked in. He wished he had the time or patience to take his time exploring his body. He had breasts, and hips and such tiny feet! Kristina had no idea why she was so mesmerized by her own feet complete with wriggling green painted toes. They were just so interest and if he wasn't on a time table with a pressing need he would have probably spent the rest of the day enjoying them.

Kris's legs just about buckled when his fingers lightly grazed over his clit. "Wow." His back pressed against the cool tiles of the shower wall he brushed the sensitive nub of flesh again and shivered. "No fucking way." Kris gasped thankful his legs didn't have to fully support him because they couldn't have as that next wave slammed him. "No wonder she's always telling me not so rough." Kris steeled himself and slid two slender digits between his slicked labia and for what felt like the first time, Kris experienced what it was like to have something inside him. Being a woman apparently had its upsides and this was high on the list.

"Kristina!" Kris's eyes snapped open, he wasn't sure how long he'd been in the shower but it was apparently longer than Kristina had to spare before being at work. And the water was starting to get cold. "Hurry up!" Kris finished his shower. He'd never noticed his nipples being nearly this sensitive drying off before.

Getting dressed was a lot simpler when you were a man. Kris spent several minutes and another shout from Sara trying to figure out how the fuck he was supposed to fasten a bra behind his back. For a second he thought about asking for help but decided against it instead tossing the bra in with the dirty clothes and pulling on the dark blue polo shirt and beige khakis. There were less flattering looks, the pants didn't do much to show off his, her, Kristina's legs and the shirt made the slight gut look a lot bigger than it actually was but he'd still fuck that.

Back in the bedroom Kris spun around several times trying to figure out where the fuck Kristina hid the shoes. On a whim he shut the door and gasped. She had a lot of shoes. Like five pairs across (They were so tiny!), and seven down. Heels, sneakers, sandals, things Kris wasn't sure the proper name for. It was a major choice overload by comparison to his real life where he had precisely four pairs of shoes. Dress shoes for special occasions, work boots for no real reason, flip flops because he never threw them away after a year spent swimming and regular black shoes for everyday. The dress shoes actually had a noticeable coating of dust on them. There wasn't time, a fact Kris was finding increasingly annoying with each passing minute, to do much more than pick something that looked comfortable and go with it so he settled on pair of soft looking black shoes.

"You're really cutting it close. I hope traffic is on your side." Sara thrust something wrapped in a paper towel at Kristina as she passed. Whatever it was it was warm and it smelled syrupy and delicious. In a motion so smooth it must have just been muscle memory Kristina swooped her keys off the rack and dashed out the door taking the steps two at a time all the way down to the garage.

Kris was both impressed that he knew which car he was and pissed off that he was right when he walked over to a lemon yellow modern Volkswagen Beatle and started it up. It was definitely roomier than he remembered them being but Kristina seemed to be at least five or six inches shorter than Kris which probably explained that.

The ride to work was quick and painless. A surprise since Kris didn't really have any idea where he was going and got there by the same ingrained memory that guided him to the right car. It lead him to a surprisingly close parking spot behind a dumpster and straight to a locker that was opened with the password to get into Wily's Castle in Megaman IV with a visor decorated with Legend of Zelda pins. Kristina wasn't an entirely unlikeable woman.

"You're cutting it a little close Ms. Rose." Kris didn't need to turn around to know that was Peter, her boss and all around prick.

"I know but I'm on time." Kristina knew better than to take that tone with her boss but she couldn't quite help herself.

Kristina was almost to the door when Peter spoke. "Wait, before you go out on the floor I need you to clean up the ladies' room.

"Of course." Kristina replied with as much of a smile as he could muster. She was reasonably certain that cleaning the rest room wasn't part of her job description and there people here before her shift started. People who Peter didn't expect to haul that stupid three wheeled bucket that would spill everywhere if you didn't balance it just all the way through the store to clean up what was probably the result of a sick child, a backed up toilet or some horrible combination of the two.

OoOoO

Stephanie knelt down beside Mary and gently ran her fingers down over the prone woman's cheek. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so rough." She placed a soft kiss on Mary's forehead and the cold damp feeling was gone.

The fear fled along with it replaced with comforting warmth and a hint of curiosity. Now that Mary wasn't trying to flee for her life and she wasn't certain that death was only a few heart beats away her pulse slowed and she was able to actually look at Stephanie. In her terror she hadn't really noticed how deliciously proportioned Stephanie was. For one thing Stephanie wasn't nearly as monstrously tall as she'd looked earlier; it must have been fear making her appear like a giantess instead of just a tall woman.

Stephanie cupped Mary's cheek and Mary followed it's warmth until it led her to Stephanie's lips. Kissing a woman wasn't at all like a man, not like Kris anyway. Stephanie's lips were soft and she tasted just like smelled, faintly of brown sugar and cinnamon. When her tongue slipped against Mary's it was more like dancing than the dominance display her male lovers gave. It was so encompassing that she didn't even notice Stephanie undressing her until their lips were forced to part for a few fractions of a second and Mary was the one who ended it.

Mary closed her eyes drinking in the woman's essence. Her hands seemed to move independent of her thoughts unfastening her pants and wriggling out of them while Stephanie unfastened Mary's bra. Together the two managed to get Mary out of her socks so both their bare bodies could touch from head to toe.

Everywhere Mary's body touched Stephanie's was warm, almost hot to the touch, a good heat, like a sweater fresh out of the dryer brushing against her breasts, gliding against her belly, sliding between her legs. Stephanie's agile fingers painted lines of pleasure starting at Mary's shoulders and ending at the small of her back before returning to her shoulders. Mary found herself craving that warmth, so she intertwined her legs with Stephanie's and wrapped her arms around the succubus. Even the air the woman breathed seemed infused with that intoxicating warmth. It filled Mary's chest each time her breasts swelled with Stephanie's essence.

There was even music playing. Mary had no idea where it was coming from or what song it was only that had a beat that seemed to move straight to her hips. She couldn't stop her hips from gyrating against Stephanie's firm thigh. The succubus was elated to oblige her human victim twisting so she was a top Mary.

The music grew louder but instead of becoming more distinct it became an angry buzz. Instead of coming from some undetermined location it was coming from right to Mary's left where it hid behind Stephanie's straight black hair. Mary's arm shout out angrily through Stephanie's ebony tresses to swat whatever was making that obnoxious noise. It a moment but she found the offending hunk of plastic-

-and wrapped a very masculine paws around an alarm clock and stopped just shy of hurling it against the wall. Mary would have sat up but she was already sitting in a huge recliner with one hairy leg thrown over the arm rest. "Okay." Mary pushed herself up and out of the recliner and onto feet that weren't quite steady beneath her. Those feet nearly moved from beneath her but she steadied herself on the wall and noticed why those legs didn't really want to carry her. There was a half empty bottle of vodka right next to the recliner. "Well okay." Mary took another unsteady step then swallowed hard and got her balance.

She really wasn't that drunk, her head was just spinning a little. That might have more to do with the hairy bulging arms extending from a Stone Cold tee shirt stretched over a broad chest than any amount of alcohol. Mary took a moment then and shoved an obviously oversized hand down into the torn denim jeans wrapping her frigid fingers around her slightly undersized cock yelping in shock at the same time.

"No wonder Kris always gets so cross when I grab him with cold hands. That sucks!" Mary gasped. She didn't let go though, curiosity made her pull out her cock. For a few minutes she stood in wonder weighing her testicles in her still cold hands causing them to shrivel away. She lightly slapped and stroked it gasping when it seemed to lurch on it own. She was about to begin some more intense experiments when a familiar pressure notified her that she needed to use the bathroom.

"How am I supposed to!" Mary cried unable to aim her now erect penis at the toilet. She tried standing on one foot, turning around and leaning over, leaning over and balancing one hand against the bathroom wall (swearing she'd bleach her hands afterward) and nothing seemed to get that stubbornly rigid piece of flesh pointed at the toilet. She thought about waiting until it became more pliable on it's own but she had no clue when or if that would happen. Kris certainly made it seem like there was only a single cure for an erection and there was no time for that. She was already squeezing uncomfortably tight. It took a few more minutes of frustratingly trying to force her suddenly masculine form to twist into positions she used to find easy before she gave up whipped the shower curtain out of the way and relieved her bladder. She silently made a note not to give Kris such a hard time the next time she caught him.

She'd barely finished when Martin's cock softened in her grasp rendering the entire gymnastic routine and surrender to her pragmatism a little more humiliating in hindsight.

An angrily growling stomach that sounded more like an angry bear than any sound that should come from a human interrupted the rest of Martin's thoughts though. When said same bear apparently started trying to claw its way past the Shiki Fuujin keeping the Reibi no Kuma from ravaging the land in search of pineapple and sausage pizza.

That sequence of thoughts was immediately disturbing. Mary hadn't watched anime since Dragon Ball killed off Frieza, she didn't know any Japanese, certainly not enough to think about a bear without a tail, and demon bear sealed in her stomach would have been a concern if not for the even more disturbing and enticing thought moving around her mind.

Pineapple and sausage pizza?! What the fuck was wrong with Martin that made him crave that kind of twisted food at . . . she had no idea what time it was but it was too early for pizza of any sort. It would be too early for pineapple and sausage pizza until long after naught but dust and bones.