Swapped Ch. 01

That was another strange turn of phrase for Martin but she didn't want to 'go Reibi' so she pushed that question aside and walked to the kitchen. The fridge was devoid of actual food. A half pizza with pineapples, cherries and pepperoni sat next to a six pack of beer. Her mind and her stomach were having quiet the conflict over that pizza but her stomach eventually triumphed and three slices were tossed on a paper plate bound for the microwave while she continued to search for something normal to eat. There was a gallon of milk and an almost empty two liter bottle of Mountain Dew Code Red.

Five minutes later Mary was right back where she'd woken with the foot rest kicked up and the television on. The pizza was amazing, sweet, salty, juicy and greasy, all the important food groups in each bite. Once he was full Mary settled let his/her thoughts to flow again.

She was a man now, a fairly handsome, well endowed, just slightly overweight man. Actually she was fairly certain that she was more than just well endowed and if Martin didn't have hands like baseball mitts it wouldn't look so small. He was immediately tempted to call Rachel for a booty call, that five foot nothing Asian beauty was always great when Martin's ego needed a bit of stroking. It didn't hurt that she was always more than willing to fake an accent and tell him he was hung like Godzilla and would never fit. Martin quickly rattled off a few more facts about Rachel, the Boston born (and boy did she sound it sometimes) Japanese American who had a long time friends with benefits relationship with Martin.

Mary paused and took a deep breath taking a moment to sort out why she was where she was. A quick pinch confirmed she either wasn't dreaming or wasn't waking up. She was also fairly certain that she'd been awake when she ran into that freaky sexy demon chick after . . . it was fight . . . a fight about something. Her mind refused to focus on why she'd been so upset but she could remember wishing that Kris knew what it was like to be her before that red hot hottie had appeared.

Martin's shoulders sank as a frightening thought crossed her mind. She'd made a wish to a demon when she was pissed off at . . . someone for reasons she couldn't quite fathom. What if and this was just a working theory until something a little less stupid stumbled into his mind but what if that crazy ten foot tall fit big breasted black haired sex pot who smelled of brown sugar and cinnamon had changed her into a man?

She chuckled at the possibility for a moment. The chuckles were beaten back by laughter which in turn were drown by guffaws. The guffaws themselves were slaughtered by rib splitting howls that were finally in turned ruthlessly massacred by deafening sobs completely with molten tears searing their way over his cheeks. Martin couldn't remember the last time he'd cried, a fact he took no small measure of pride in but it was a tiny bit cathartic. If anybody had seen that he personally rip out their spins and play the back nine with their eyeballs but in the absence of witnesses it was okay.

Mary savored the mental image of ripping Kyle's spine out for minute. It was a nice image.

"Okay, trapped in the body of a man. I'm clearly being punished for not being a good girlfriend and I need to find that succubus and make her," that thought quickly leapt to another more immediate thought, "how strong am I?"

An hour later Martin was pleased to confirm that moving furniture no longer required calling up friends who demanded beer or booty for their services, running a three miles was painful but not impossible and the top shelf where all the big cups were stored didn't require getting a foot stool or climbing on the counter. Being a man had some upsides.

Two hours later Martin had stumbled over his video game collection and Mary was in awe. She didn't have a poor collection herself but Martin apparently spent a fair bit of his money on games because he had more games for each system than she had period. Martin decided to settle on L.A. Noire because Mary had never finished it, grabbed the six pack of beer (there wasn't much point in getting up once he got comfortable was there?) set a bowl of Cheetoes on the coffee table snuggled down as deep as that recliner would let him go and set out to bring justice to the world.

And his phone rang.

And the ring tone was 'Get the Party Started' by Pink.

And Martin didn't want to answer the phone but Sheila wasn't one to give up. She'd try his land line, both of them, then his cell phone a few more times, there'd be a message. It was really very troublesome and the quickest and easiest thing to do was answer the phone so he did. "Hey Sheila, how are you." Apparently Sheila was starting to learn to sandwich the shit between something sweet because she started off her rant by telling him that she'd bought a new pair of shoes that were super cute. She caused a good dozen or so investigations of scum to go awry, two bad chases, and a dozen easily avoided deaths while she bitched about her mother. There were details, it involved spaghetti, tomato sauce, diabetes, cooking, a lack of appreciation for hard work and Martin was doing his best to remember to grunt at appropriate intervals. He must have done a fairly good job because the sweetness at the end was that she was heading over to his place.

Martin was down four beers and closing in on an arsonist when the front door opened. He didn't set down the controller, he didn't even turn his head, there wasn't need and more importantly there wasn't time. A drug dealing piece of shit was leading Phelps on a merry rooftop chase and if he blinked he'd screw it up and have to start over.

"Hi baby!" Martin could just about see his girlfriend out of the corner of his eye. She hadn't come straight from work unless she started putting on make up for work, including fire engine red lipstick that got on everything and let Martin know that he'd had a good raunchy fuck the next morning when he founded it smeared all over his cloths, his sheets, throat, cock and random other bits of flesh and furniture. She had on blue eye shadow that would start to run once she built up a sweat.

"Hey." Martin replied careful to keep his focus where it belonged on the television though he was leveraging his way to his feet. She'd get fussy if she thought he was paying more attention to that 'damn game' than to her. The truth was if she'd shown up a little later or a little earlier he'd be at a spot where it was easier to spot but she'd just have to bare with him for a few minutes while he wrapped things up.

She dodged the blind kiss he tried plant on her cheek, forehead, temple, shoulder, really whatever body part happened to align itself with his lips. He wasn't picky about such things. Inwardly Mary frowned, the game really could wait and Sheila had gone through all the trouble of getting made up and coming over. To get laid. Martin finished the thought. She's not doing me a favor and she can wait five minutes without getting huff. Mary couldn't really argue with that and more importantly the drug dealing bastard had turned around and knocked Phelps on his ass in the few seconds she'd allowed her minds to wander and Sheila really could wait the few minutes it would take to finish up.

It was actually closer to fifteen minutes before Martin finished up that segment. It would have been faster but Sheila had taken a beer and gotten him killed in the process. She knew good and well that he kept a bottle of that pussy Malibu Rum she liked in the fridge for her so he had no clue why she was looking at his beer let alone touching it. It made no sense.

Sheila didn't seem to be too upset about the wait. Certainly not so upset that she didn't instantly drop that fussy look from her face when Martin grabbed her by her midriff bared by a dress shirt knotted beneath her breasts and pulled her up against her not quite kissing her but instead enjoying her emerald eyes. "You're beautiful." Martin whispered and pulled her the last inch into a kiss.

Martin was only gentle with his raven haired beauty for a heart beat before lifting her up. Instinctively she wrapped her slender legs around his middle letting him remove a skin tight black pencil skirt that he hadn't even bothered glancing at. He was equally uninterested in her panties with the words 'Just 4 U' emblazoned across her ass. She didn't have much time to frown about it though, not with his tongue invading her mouth nor with his hands groping her ass roughly while carrying her through the house to his bed.

The petite woman didn't protest at all when Martin all but dropped her onto his mattress grinning as she bounced twice before settling into place. He peeled his shirt off and tossed aside taking an extra moment to shed his pants because Mary hadn't taken the time earlier to inspect every inch of his/her glorious naked body. If she hadn't already been in it she'd certainly be looking forward to being wrapped around his trimmed form. Sheila seemed to agree judging by the way she splayed her legs open and stared up at him invitingly.

Mary knew that look well even if she'd never been on the receiving end before. Being able to look down at a woman pleading with her eyes to be taken suddenly made it obvious why Kris lost track of whatever he was thinking of right. The dark skinned beauty rolled onto her belly cupping Martin's scrotum and urging her towards her red painted lips wrapping them around his cock. Mary watched the small woman's lips strain to handle Martin's endowment pushing as far as she could manage before coming up for air. Each time she went down Mary could see how much more Sheila managed to devour because each attempt left a new lipstick ring. Kris's stupid request to wear make up and make eye contact . . . maybe not stupid. Without even thinking about it Mary grabbed Sheila by the hair and pulled and held her down while Martin's cock throbbed.

"Don't close your eyes." Mary/Martin barked and Sheila obeyed. Martin's grip tightened for a moment keeping his girlfriend from retreating from the torrent of cum he was firing down her throat. She was smiling. As much as she could with her lips stretched around his cock. Her she had a single black tear painting a line down each cheek and a tiny bit of semen and saliva drooled out of the corner of her mouth. When Martin finally released her Sheila stayed in place a moment longer diligently squeezing the last drop of cum onto her outstretched tongue before swallowing.

"Did I do good?" Using Martin's cock like a little leash Sheila pulled him into bed beside her and kissed him. Mary reflexively pulled back slightly before Martin relaxed back into kissing his cock sucking whore a girlfriend. Martin tried to smother Mary's thoughts but they were at the forefront of her/his mind. She didn't want to kiss Sheila! She knew exactly where that mouth had been just seconds ago. Kris never made her feel dirty after that, of course he makes me do much nastier things than suck cock. It wasn't even the taste or anything, just the thought but Martin's lust eventually pushed Mary's thoughts back into corner and returned to kissing Sheila.

Sheila twisted her hips rolling Martin beneath her in the process. Her eyes locked with Martin's as she sat down on his cock. Sheila's mouth fell open without a single sound escaping from. Martin gripped her small waist sinking his fingers into her firm flesh pacing her. The look in her eyes was at once frustrated and excited. Mary instantly felt the rush of power in denying Sheila, feeling the small woman trying to force her hips to move faster and deeper. "Don't be so mean Martin." Sheila whimpered. Martin held her perfectly still for a second enjoying the way her inner walls desperately clamped down on his cock then let her go. Sheila rode him hard enough that the bed creaked, her buttocks clapped against his thighs and her smallish breasts seemed to almost vibrate instead of bouncing.

Then it happened. Sheila raked her nails down Martin's chest leaving sets of long angry red scratches in his flesh and screamed. Her body constricted around Martin at the same time. It was only Mary's second orgasm in her male, in Martin's; her mind couldn't quite untangle the gender identity in the middle of the pleasure. Martin let his eyes glide shut for a moment.

When they opened Sheila was curled around him, one arm was slung across his chest, one of her legs was intertwined with his and her head was on his shoulder. "So I guess you want to get back to your game?" Sheila tried sounding considerate instead of disappointed.

Martin started to open his mouth. He really did want to get back to finishing his game. Mary shut his mouth and kissed Sheila's forehead and pulled the sheets around them both. The game would still be there when she, he, they, whatever woke up.