All Comments on 'The Accident That Wasn't'

An abrupt story, without beginning, without end.

For a short one, it was pretty darn good….if well worn.

.

4 ****

How is erotic and why is it in literotica site?

Reminds me of a few HDK stories. Still, a very good story, Slirpuff, thanks. Like someone else said, short, sweet and right to the point.

5 stars.

Short sharp and to the point, but I wish there was more. (Before and after the incident.)

To the point. I LOVE IT! DMW aka

short and sweet. LOL

ended with a bang...........bye bitch

Good first 1/2 of story. Now it just needs an ending. 3 points for 1/2 a story.

Story was going well until you abruptly ended it!!

Too short, defiantly needs to be expanded. This has all the earmarks of a great story.

please, post this stuff in non-erotic. great story though

Short, fast, and sweet. Thanks for your writing.

Well written, 4stars. Finish it, I'd give it 5.

A flash story is just that. Don't expect all of your questions to be answered. Sometimes you just have yo use your imagination and fill in the blanks yourself.

Can't understand that apparently read the description but STILL are pissed when it was as described. Can't fix stupid huh! Good tale!

somewhere east of Omaha

This is exactly what it is supposed to be, a quick description of an event,not a story,stories take time to unfold. I am not a fan of flash so I leave no rating....JZK

Perfect succinct. 5 stars.

Good story bit too short and needing more flesh on the bones.

Makes me want to make an account. Very precise story, the only reason i'm commenting in a good way is that it could be true. Thank you for all the other stories.

Great as a flash story, would love to see "the REST of the story!"

It does what a flash story is meant to do, the operative word is "FLASH". A single snap shot at a life or an event.

Simple really!

I liked it, good flash story. I guess I've read enough LW to fill in the gaps. The story is complete😁

I find it hard to believe she or anyone would admit what she did at the end there.

Short, but I was able to get through it. Great story.

Those complaining about the length have no imagination. 1) He has a successful business that his greedy wife wants more (all?) money out of. 2) She's having an affair with "Uncle" David. Don't know, don't care if a real uncle or a "best friend" that the kids call uncle. 3) They tried to kill him to get the business, 3A) Uncle David has been embezzling, as the ledgers will prove.

Too short. At least there wasn't as much time wasted reading it.

I stumbled upon this again. I had forgotten the title and author... bookmark. Besides it being an rare storyline, is that it itself is memorable. There are stories kinda like it, but when I read them I’m comparing them to this story; it set the standard for me.

Way too short. Might have well just been the title of a story with little substance. I will give it a generous 3 as the skeleton of a story is mostly there.

That's a masterclass in economical use of words. Good stuff.

Told from the point of view of the husband, it doesn't need more. You don't need to know what the ledgers say. You don't need to know if the wife and uncle were having an affair. It's an attempted murder told perfectly. Thanks for sharing.

Missing a good chunk of the story including a full ending

Everything we needed in just a few words.

Good take.

If you are going to yank the tigers' tail or poke him with a sharp stick you better have a plan for the claws and teeth. Good Job. Signed: BTW

Short but covered it all

That was short and to the point.

You gotta give us the run down.

Chur bro awsum story

Not only does he dump a cheating wife but with her charged with trying to kill him, her and the asshole bother end up in jail and he gets a clean divorce with custody of his kids. Sounds like a win-win.

...loved it. 5 star. Thanx!

Loklie

Flash means just that. One scene, minimal characters and plenty of dialogue. The writer needs to be good enough to infer the prologue and epilogue.

You did well.

That. Was. Prime. Stuff.

Short but not so sweet. *****

"A FLASH story for my friends." No background. No details. No 'fill in the gaps'. Just a sweet, short, get to the point and get it done. No muss, no fuss. 5*.

is a flash..:) Thanks, SP. Hey detractors, listen up. If you want, maybe he'll let you take the premise and baseline for you to run with it into your own full-blown story, if and only if you have the guts to post it here. Chickenshit is what it is. Take the heat yourself one time.

This was a very good flash story. The author stated that this was a flash story, so why do idiots like Erotfan make their stupid comments about this story being a flash story. Because they are idiots!

Write good flash fiction. Regardless of other comments, the story is complete and just the right length.8

would have made a great longer story.

no back-fill... no epilogue... no coda.

I don't score snippets.

but too short dammit!

Great story! 5!

And this is a great one. 5 stars

boom-------- nice short sharp shock------ I love a quicky 5

she is really pissed off, for some unknown reason. TK U MLJ LV NV

Are you sure it wasn't Heather?

Can't beat a quickie!

it's amazing you could cram that much drama into such a short story. I know many complained it was incomplete but you really had to understand the short ending to get the full meaning

Where's the rest of it?

Great story. I enjoyed reading it and had to read it twice. It is a good story line for a bigger story, I wouldn't mind reading such a story from You. Keep em coming and we'll keep reading em.

NOW the time is right. TK U MLJ LV NV

Yep, I couldn't believe Slirpuff ( aka Steve Moore ) had actually written this tale. Where were the spelling, grammar & basic English mistakes ...... GONE, oh no, somebody's stolen Steve's LW id.

That aside, this was a fun read, short, sharp & to the point, didn't need anymore. Keep it up. 5 *****

I liked it well enough and thought it was good while it lasted, but.........

In the follow up you guys want so much Steve misses the sound of her voice, begins visiting her in prison and is waiting for her when she gets paroled.

And all you others who don't like the length of this story.

From the bottom of my balls, BLOW ME!

If you want more, ask the author if you can "finish" it yourself.

Few words that pack a punch. Well written.

Thank you.

Regards,

-Pultoy

Very good, well written, tells the tale and even the English is quite good. Keep writing

Not too long, not too short!

Just concise, covered all the needed basis (at least for those of us who have an imagination) and...Perfect!!!

Thanks!

Just another excuse for not filling out the details. Or you're joining Britease and JPB in not bothering to finish your stories. Where is Finishthedamnstory when you need him?

To paraphrase an old news man: "And where's the rest of the story?"

It is fairly obvious you are holding back "The rest of the story."

I didn't read all the comments but one said short and sweet but could have been more. I tend to agree with that comment. I have read most of your stories and am sure I liked them all. In some cases more is better. Thanks for the read though, I really liked it.

ps. kudos on your comment to H in VA. He tends to ding me all the time too and often writes so much it is a shame he doesn't channel that energy into actually writing a story once. *S* at least all you got was his zzzzz's.

pss. sorry for anonymous but I didn't feel like signing in today.

I haven't seen you negative commits in too long.

Glad to see your still out there...

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

.... "FLASH! AHH-AHHH, SAVIOR OF THE UNIVERSE!"...

A good few minutes worth. Ok, it's wrapped up in a short page, but it also could have been great as a full write. There's more in here than in some other's whole story.

Cheers

'nuff said

A sterling example of what a skilled writer can do in the shortest possible space without superfluous details. Well done Sir! Five stars.

A remarkably skilled, imaginative, and consistent writer, and this does not vary at all from his high standard.

Slirpuff is one of the writers who inspired me to post some of my own stuff here. It's great to have another contribution and I want to give it a high score - in thanks and to encourage more.

As others have said, this story is well-written and as a taster is fine. But it leaves me dissatisfied and wanting more, I think because it does not work in its own terms. It sets out a situation but fails to absorb us into the action and make us care about the characters, who are not provided with uniqueness or personality. I think very short stories such as those written by the greats (Hemingway, Carver, Cheever for you Americans, I guess) create an intense moment full of curious elements and a vital charge of ambiguity which leaves the reader wondering what happened when the momentary exposure of the scene is over. This story leaves the reader nothing to wonder - except possibly to ask why an intelligent man would be married to a woman prepared to kill him for his money.

Slirpuff, your big strength is in your naturalistic description of personal conflict and in keeping your better stories psychologically truthful - that is to say you let your characters do what is true to their personality. Your best stories - not I think the highrest scoring, but for instance A Room with a View - do this better than anybody else. Another story of marital conflict, where husband and wife more or less love one another but are beset by the ups and downs of real life and real human weakness, is what I'd love to read - minimal 'plot' and maximum dramatisation of the problems in human relationships.

Unsatifying story, in my opinion a flash story still needs a middle, not just a beginning and an end. About as erotic as slamming your finger in a door. 2*

Too short. welcome back.

Great to have your imagination and skills back. You have been sorely missed. Will be checking for more of your work regularly. 5 for this one.

He had the prescience to keep his mouth shut. Really good quickie. Real fiver! It has the makings of an interesting longy.

well written but incomplete... you cant end a story like that... we need more... much more...

In the day's of rampant identity theft, all major creditors being frauds, 1000s of lawyers threatening people for fraudulent debt... yeah, EVERYONE should be keeping their most important records by hand... and storing it for bloody ever.

Yea Slirpuff, I wanted more . Please, write soon. Make it a big juicy, thoughtful,

heart rendering, and sexy story. Am I asking for much?

@LSD Yes cutting a brake line is mundane and old. Writers have used it for 100 years, to kill people. On the other hand criminals have been using hand written ledgers as a second set of books. They are unhackable. Not downloadable

(a memory stick for example). And not easily erased or manipulated. I guess

you aren't much of a criminal LSD. lol.

Salivating for another Slirpuff I am

AMerryMan

Please keep up the great work.

The 'off' aspects are well-addressed among the comments, as are the kudos. I hereby echo both!

'Uncle' Dave,' to address a comment, may well NOT be a blood relative or an in-law. Very economical read, but certainly rich...and COMPLETE. Do those who want it stretched out REALLY want to read about the red-head bitch and UncaDave in (different) prisons for 40 years? I thought not.

Even this little one beats the hell out of almost all the rest. I hope you find time to stay tuned.

best make plans to Plan B, TK U MLJ LV NV

Not one wasted word. Interesting and to the point. Well done.

A lot of good authors are ill or passing away(relinquish,castlestone,josephus...) i am glad you are with us!

... but it's good to see you back. Even though I haven't always appreciated everything that you've written, I still think that you're the most talented writer on this site and "Life After Death" remains my favorite story to this day.

For a prolific writer you have been gone for a year and a half,it's nice to see you are still with us. I just hope you start writing your wonderful stories again. By the way thank you for all you have written.

This story was tight. Not just its length, but its economy of words and presentation. Maybe the best written of SP's stories? Was kind of hoping for a classic SP marriage in turmoil emotional rollercoaster, but this was slick as hell.

Well written and engaging. Thanks for sharing.

Always a pleasure reading your stuff, I look forward to Moore.......

Great your back!!!! Please not so long before another story

Nothing like a really short story from a really good writer. All the essentials are there. We fill in our own details...or not. It could be expanded into a fuller story, but there is no need. Total immersion into another person's mind for a few minutes. Wow.

I keep you on as favorite knowing you will return sometime,,, nice to have you back

A masterpiece and worth every 5*!