All Comments on 'The Best Fuck Ever'

So much for their happy loving life. You going to get comments about finishing the tale. No need. The end is obvious.

Five Stars

A bit confusing but ok. I give it a 4

I'd say five stars right up to the end, which seemed rushed. It is not that the storyline needs to be finished, it is that there is too much left unsaid. Yes, I can guess what happens. However, given the quality of writing, I expected more. I assume that Mike was setting up his wife as a sort of revenge. She shoots Aaron. And then what? Does he really want to get his wife back, or is he looking to push her over the edge? Does she go to jail, or is she given a pass as the daughter claims she was being raped? The email would indicate evidence that she invited him over, and yet if the daughter claims rape it would seem to leave us . . . I don't know where that leaves us. The ending is ambiguous. That is unfortunate, because is really enjoyed your writing. Very exceptional. You did such a great job of providing insight into the wife and daughters thinking, but with Mike we are left in the dark as to his feelings.

But when you stop to think of it, he set up his daughter so his wife could kill Aaron. Hardly the act of a loving father.

As dBeamer3333 said, the ending felt rushed. Its a really good plot, but I think it needs to be expanded a lot more. And the ending softened to make Mike's actions less injurious to his daughter.

Never saw it coming till the end, so 5*

great story but could use a little more depth to it.

Good story...But...I believe someone like the wife that had suffered so much in her young life, would succumb so easy to the teacher...

Too much goin from one person and another, would like to know what happened? In my mind she shoots n kills both Aaron and Mary and goes to prison , hence why it was their last best fuck ever

So I guess we all arrive at our own ideas of what happened, exactly?

Very difficult to follow, as the story jumps around from one point of view to another. The "***" divider should be used as sparingly as possible. This is a good example of what happens when it isn't.

As for the story itself, I can never figure out why the cheated husband (who is always a heroic figure with some sort of super power, whether it is a detective or spy or someone with connections to the mob) doesn't just sit down and TALK with his loving wife and/or daughter when he suspects something is happening at home. I suppose that would ruin the bloodsport of the revenge fantasy, eh?

I liked the story and it's characters; nice build up to the anticipated end. How did it end in my mind? I don't know, not my story; but I would eventually like to read phubby's ending.

BDEarth

Some of the people commenting here don't seem to know what "fatal" means. His wife shot the professor. End of story.

It would have been a good story if you had not let Mary get raped. Your story died at that point, along with the professor The professor needed to die but the husband should have been man enough to handle it and protect Mary.

No father would let his daughter get raped -- if he does he is less than human -- even if it's to plot a revenge on an unfaithful wife. The true betrayal is Mike’s betrayal of the love Mary has for him.

I don't think the issue is that readers are confused about whether or not she shoots the professor. The plot is finished. The story is incomplete in that the reader is not really given insight into Mike's intentions. What was his point? Revenge against the professor? That seems obvious. But at the expense of his daughter who was sacrificing a great deal to save her parents marriage? Revenge against the wife? I'm not sure it's a slam dunk that she goes to jail. Stopping her daughters rape might qualify her as a hero. It all hinges on how that email is perceived.

My point is that Mikes actions at the end seem to contradict how he is portrayed early on. Either the author is trying to be clever and surprise the reader, or he has simply left some holes. Like you said, his actions seem odd. Why not simply talk to his wife? He seems to love her. He understands that she comes from a screwed up past. He even seems to understand that he has been neglecting her. He also seems to get that this guy seduced her. And yet, he acts contrary to such knowledge by acting in the most extreme way possible.

Very artsy fartsy style. Confusing too.

floundered completely.

5*s turned into 1* by the end

The ending sucked and I agree with a few others .... A loving father would NEVER setup his daughter to be raped so he could frame his wife. So I guess your description of Mike was a fake to make us think he was a nice guy!

Anyway .... I loved the story up until the very end so I still gave it 5*, although it might be nice to get a chapter 2 to bring it all back!

You are the author, not me, so whatever you think is best!

Great start to a story, would love to see how it all worked out.

Ordinarily I check an author's page for other stories, I declined.

worthless read with no proper ending

Several fatal possibilities.

1. Liz shoots the professor. One shot! Fatal!

2. Liz shoots the professor. The bullets passes through the professor and hits Mary. One shot! Two fatalities!

3. Liz shoots the professor. One shot, one fatality. Then Liz shoots Mary. One shot, two fatalities! (Because Liz is boinking Mary's new lover and that's the betrayal she feels!)

4. Liz shoots the professor. The bullet goes through the professor and then into Mary. One shot, two fatalites! Then Mary, horrified that she has killed her daughter, shoots herself. Two shots, three fatalities.

5. Liz shoots the professor. One shot, one fatality. Then Mary, enraged because of the betrayal she feels (see 3. above.), shoots Liz. Two shots, two fatalities. Then, Mary, horrified that she has deliberately killed her daughter (and her temporary insanity abates), shoots herself. Three shots, three fatalities.

6. Other possibilities: [Acop's handgun today (date of story is 09/02/14) is most likely a 9mm pistol, double-stacked magazine with 15 hollow-point rounds.] Mary empties the magazine into the professor, or accidentally into the professor and accidentally* into Mary, or deliberately into the Professor and Mary; and then may or may not kill herself. Perhaps more--Mike was outside but maybe he comes in and gets hit, accidentally or deliberately (Mary somehow realizes Mike set them up and takes revenge on him, too.

_____________

*Accidentally in the sense that Mary was shooting the professor and the bullets overpenetrated through his body into Mary.

0 stars

Did nothing for me

Another person who puts career first over family

Stupid reaction to loneliness

Happens all the time especially to militant when separated for long tour

What else expect

...with these characters who cannot go without sex during a work-related separation. Many people do it. The cheaters are just weak.

So the husband effectively allows his rival to rape his daughter so that his cheating wife will kill the guy? Not very noble!

This actually had possibilities but it threw them out and ended up being a complete dumpster fire.

I never get how you kids take a decent idea and just decide "Hey, this could be good but ya know what...fuck it why bother!!!"

It's not finished, but I hope Mike timed the coming home perfectly so that Aaron had no time to rape the daughter. Liz shoots Aaron with however number of bullets but doesn't hit Mary.

Mary confirms the attempted rape and Liz gets free.

Liz dedicates her life to her marraiged and family.

Over time Mike forgives Liz and they live happy.

Ftds 1star

Great story telling. It gets the reader running various permutations and eager to wolf a follow up. Kudos

Still a 5 for me. The story let's you do your permutations and combinations if u would. Many comments seem unfair to Mike. It's the love of family that sent him working his arse off for their collective betterment. The betrayers n philanderer deserve what's coming to them. He may seem to have put his daughter in harm's way but he lurked around to timely intervene. In any case, vengeance is poisonous, + double edged and the collateral damage could be high.

You need to definitely finish. This is one that can't be left to wonder.