The Catch

"No doubt you are amazed that this miraculous transmogrification has happened?" she said in perfect English, without any trace of accent, a fairly husky, yet feminine voice both pleasant and unsettlingly sexy, "Still happening, as you can see."

Drew looked down at her long tail, which was melting away from its original fishy singular form and turning into a pair of extremely shapely legs, her fins also evolving rapidly into a pair of long and slim dainty-toed feet. He raised his head to her bemused smile once again.

"How?" Drew's mind was racing, filling with questions, possibilities, worries for his sanity, fears for his safety, excitement that this was happening to him, yet all he could get out was a single stuttering syllable.

"Magic, Drew," she almost sang her words to him, sending electric pulses of tingles up and down his spine, "I am borne out of the love you held for my oceanic form."

"Because I kissed you?" he asked, still coping with the shock, "All this because of a kiss?"

"Ah, but what a kiss," she smiled with a dreamy look which made her stunning face look impossibly even more desirable, "Such a kiss no man has ever bestowed upon an immortal. The poets could occupy themselves for millennia on this one act alone."

"How can you speak so well, how is it even possible that you know my name?" Drew now finding his voice.

"Your kiss conferred to me all your memories, every experience, each and every hope and aspiration you have ever harboured, all of your deepest most secret desires and knowledge at first hand of exactly what pleases you as well as what you have wanted but never had the opportunity to try."

"So what does that all mean?"

By now her legs and feet had fully formed, her muscles taut and sculptured. She gracefully stretched out a slender arm towards Drew.

"Would you mind helping me to stand, Drew? I may be a little wobbly for a while as I get used to having legs for the first time."

"So, do you have the ability to read my thoughts?" asked Drew.

"No, of course not, my dear heart," she smiled showing even white teeth, the action swelling plump freckled flesh high on her cheekbones and crinkling the skin around eyes that Drew noticed were a gloriously deep green colour, "When your lips touched me you completed a process already begun when you hooked me. I felt drawn towards you as if this was always meant to be, as if the gods themselves decreed we be bound together for as long as there are stars in the heavens. That premonition inside me was compounded by feelings emanating from you through the slender line that held me, bonding me to your soul. This inspired me to desire that we would be joined together for ever when you lifted me so tenderly and lovingly out of the water."

She paused for a moment as Drew absorbed this information.

"Now I will be your devoted partner in love, we could be married soon my dearest, make love every night, any time in fact at the drop of a hat would give me such pleasure. There's nothing I would deny you. I will never age, never get fat or wrinkly, be utterly devoted to you and I will care for you always. When our time together on Earth is ended we will become a new constellation to illuminate the sky for all eternity."

"Why me of all people? I just sell insurance."

"Our destiny must have been written in the stars, who knows or cares why, it only matters that we are now together," she continued, her voice melodic and captivating, "I was already intrigued by that gentle and tender act, which satisfied any doubts I might have had why I allowed myself to be caught in the first place."

"You allowed me?"

"No human has ever caught one of my kind before. Like you, we have legends of what you call mermaids, some strange and exotic intermediate creature between the two separate kingdoms of mammals and fish, but we always regarded such ideas as flights of fantasy, impossible in reality."

"If this is so fantastic what brought you here?"

"I was freeing a poor fish which nibbled at the dearly departed body of another fish and suddenly your hook, just dangling there, jumped into my mouth and, before I knew what was happening, you started reeling me in."

"What was the fish you shooed away from my hook, then?" asked Drew, intrigued.

"Naturally I know her by another ancient name, completely unpronounceable using this human tongue but an exploration of your memory banks, which I have assimilated, reveals it was a fish you call a Sea Bass."

"Oh, was it a big one?"

"Oh yes, bigger than any bass you remember catching before."

"Oh, was it much bigger?"

"Much bigger, a male bass in the prime of his life, now free to spawn more of his delightful children," she closed her eyes, "Oh, I can see in your memories horrible images of you eating fish! Now, my darling, that will have to stop from now on."

"Stop eating fish? What do you eat?"

"Seaweed, we are vegetarians," she replied, "I see from your memories that you used to like eating fish and even catching fish. No more of that my love, you'll have to live on salads and engage in other pastimes from now on in."

"What? No more fish'n'chip suppers? No more fishing? Ever?"

"That's right my darling, for that small sacrifice you have me to give you sweet sweet loving every night for the rest of eternity..."

***

Alan paused at the engine hatch for just one delicious moment, closing his eyes as the warm sunlight hit his hot, flushed face, which he knew would be grubby with dirt and engine grease. He allowed the fresh salty breeze to sweetly refresh his turgid lungs and water down the diesel, grease and body odour aromas he knew permeated to the very core of every pore in his body. That damn engine, he thought, it had ruined his last two trips and he knew his brothers were having the self same interruptions to their fishing pleasure. They were going to have to find the money some-

Splash!

Alan's train of thought was shattered by the sound of the splash, his first new thought in panic was that Drew had been dragged or fallen overboard. He turned his head round sharply to face the stern of the small vessel and was relieved see his best friend standing there with his back to him, head bowed looking down at the water, a wet towel hanging loosely from one hand, both arms dangling by his side.

"Drew!" Alan called from the hatch as he climbed out, "Are you alright?"

Drew turned, showing a very wet shirt front and trousers.

"Fine," he replied, his face set grim.

"Thought you fell overboard," said his friend, "I heard a splash like a body going over the side."

"Just jettisoning something that wasn't as palatable as I hoped it might be. Is the engine OK?"

"Yes, the engine's ready to go," Alan smiled, "Should get us home. Gonna bite the bullet and get that new engine off of Pat. Ordering it today."

"Great idea, if Pat starts immediately that will mean the boat will be on stocks in the yard for five or six weeks, right?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"How about we go pike fishing in four weeks' time instead of sea fishing, my treat this time?"

"Yeah, sounds great," Alan said, "So long as you cheer up before then, though, you look like you've found a pound and lost a tenner, mate."

Drew smiled slowly, "I'm fine, really, although I do have a favour to ask of you."

"Anything, mate!" Alan laughed, happy to see Drew cheer up somewhat.

"Can you persuade Sherry to kick Jack into touch and then put in a good word for me?"

"Sure thing, it's a given. Looks like the beers are on you tonight, huh?"

"Yeah. Why not? We'll have a few jars in the "Jolly Fisherman" and swap fishing yarns, bags I go first!"

THE END.