The Devil's Gateway Ch. 02

"She is said to have lectured in Alexandria on mathematics, astronomy, philosophy, and mechanics. She is said to have taken over her father's position as head of the museum, and more, she was an inventor of note, figuring a way to remove salt from seawater, and invented a plane astrolabe, a device astronomers and navigators used to figure out latitude and longitude, as well as time of day. This was no ordinary woman—she was said to be the head of the intellectual community.

"Hypatia's writings have been lost to us, but she was written about by her students, Synesius of Cyrene who became bishop of Ptolemais in Libya, an odd thing considering that her death was most likely ordered by Cyril, the head of the church of Alexandria who was later named a saint by the Catholic church. What is so hateful is how they killed her. They were said to have yanked her from her chariot, dragged her into a church, bared her, then skinned her alive with oyster shells, then, while still alive, though naked of even her skin, they burned her alive. That still rankles me for it was those same patriarchal idiots that ruled us for millennia, and treated us as chattel.

"To this day, many historians say that this marked the end of science, for she was a whale of a star watcher, besides all of her other talents, and an end to what ever may have been some rights of women till these days. Hypatia's death, many believe, ushered in the Dark Ages. She was more than a woman of worth, and I wonder how many of us could have been intellectually as she was, for we still have a long way to go. There have been several years in which Nobel prizes haven't been awarded and women could have been awarded them for their work in their specialties, but it's a good ole boys club.

"Now you may say, but he—Cyril—was made a saint; how about that? To anyone who might say that, I say that the Patron saint of education is Jose Calasanz. He was the head of the famed Piarist order that did a wonderful thing in helping children that were poor to learn in schools he set up. Give the devil his due. However, he protected one priest, Stefano Cherubini, whom documents from the Vatican, no less, indicate he probably sexually abused all of the poor boys of Naples, and many more elsewhere. Calasanz did try to reign him in, even reporting him, but when it didn't go anywhere, he let it be like the good Catholic follower he was taught to be. This was in the time of Galileo. Later, this pedophile was promoted to be Calasanz' boss, and the investigator of his own crimes. Calasanz' reward for being a team player was sainthood after he died.

"That's how it worked back then in the Catholic church, and how it still works. If you don't believe it, just look at where bishop Bernard Law, the infamous bishop of Boston who protected father Geoghan, the one that finally blew all of the pedophile priests out into the open. Bishop Law has been moved up to have a position near all the powers that be in the Vatican; yes, he's been moved to Rome. Another good ole boy promotion by one of the original good ole boy clubs.

"Okay, I'm off my soapbox for now. Please forgive me, and allow me to introduce Paula, my partner, who's decided to come and meet with you, and say a few words. A few of you have wondered aloud to me who she is; well, this is Paula."

I'd seen her, and didn't know who she was, then decided that she must be one of the new ones that I hadn't noticed before. Of course, that wasn't so. When she stood, I did notice her, and closely. She was of medium height, slender, long brown, shiny hair, and a face that made you think of innocence itself, especially her eyes. She was the picture of a child-like angel.

"Hi. Ah, I'm a little nervous, not having spoken at any of Liv's classes before, or even coming to one, so please forgive me. What I'd like you to know is that I was raised in one of those churches that preached hellfire and brimstone, and how bad we must be to act so differently. I suffered through many years as a young child, then as a teenager. I just knew I was the devil's seed, and wondered how he got me into my mother's womb, and that I was damned forever.

"There is no doubt in my mind now that I'm a lesbian because I was born to prefer women. Boys, men, they never appealed to me, and I hated the few times I was too close to one of them, like at a prom—there were two for me, and frankly, it's a wonder my parents had me to go to them; they even wanted me to go.

"My father wasn't one to say much, but there was no doubt about where he stood, for he led singing in church often—he had a rich baritone voice—and many times he led in prayer services. My mother was just as god-fearing as they called it, but vocal, though never with my father.

"There were times when I was so certain that I was so bad beyond redemption that I nearly committed suicide. Then I met Liv, and little by little, though she owned my heart as soon as I met her, she taught me as she's doing with all of you, that there's nothing wrong with me but bad culture that I just don't fit into no matter what I did. My family has disowned me, but that's okay. I wish they hadn't, but that's their choice. My choice was, and is, Liv, and to live in love as is in my heart for Liv. If there are any of you that might be as I was—Liv said there seemed to be some—that's why I wanted to share this with you. I hope you'll trust your good heart, and good reason, and live joyous lives with whomever you love. Thank you for allowing me to intrude on your class."

I couldn't help it. With tears in my eyes, I was on my feet and clapping. When I looked, I saw that Caryn, Sally, Ariel, and Mary, as well as the rest, were too. So was Liv who was hugging and kissing Paula's cheek.

"Okay, I've given myself away. Next week if you decide to continue, I'll go over a few more things. The main thing I want you to leave with today is the thought of what the foundation of our Christianity is, how long it took to jell as it is now, and the Zeitgeists that have preserved it. Never forget to question, to wonder, to look for a solid foundation and question whether there is one, and then look at the times. Then if you're as I am, shake your head in wonder at how it's lasted so long. Personally, I think that a lack of education is what kept everything as it was for nearly two thousand years.

"From a bunch of tribes that never were, to a law that was invented solely to keep those people of Israel, as they were now joining up to be, to a messiah that was invented to boost people during those horrible days of the Maccabees that would never permanently end, to the redoing of the coming of that messiah, but at a different time than even he, the said to be messiah, had predicted.

"Over centuries in which the people remained illiterate, and unquestioning shortly after Constantine's time, things have pretty much stayed the same until now, but even now, there are so many who have no idea how it started, and what kept it going. Think about it, read as much as you can to help your understanding, and question, question, question, and then question some more to find the truth of the lies you've been told."

We didn't leave right away. We had to hug and kiss Paula, and we all asked her to return. She cried, we cried, and we finally left with tears in our eyes.

Chapter 14

"Penny, I felt so bad, and yet so good, when Paula talked to us. How is it possible to be both like that, feeling bad and good at the same time?"

"Must be cause we're made to be like that," was all I could say.

We'd made some very sweet love to each other, but strange in a way. It seemed that Paula hung over our persons as we loved. I felt grateful to be loving with Caryn, and if I were a mind reader, I'd say that Caryn was feeling pretty much the same with me. Paula had made a tremendous impression on Caryn, and me too for that matter. We were still with our faces on each other's thigh.

"What she said," Caryn went on in a minute, "could easily have been said about me. There were many times when I'd see a pretty girl, or something pretty about one or another, and I know I would start to wish, to fantasize, but I would cut of the thought, the wish, stifle what was in me crying to get out.

"When I saw two pretty women hugging and kissing, probably innocently as we women often do, I'd get that same thought trying to come to full fruition in me, but always, at first, I'd cut it off. God's children weren't like that, I remembered our pastor saying, among other much harsher things afterward. I'd see my mother's head firmly nodding in agreement." She smirked a bit. "She even gave out with one of those loud 'Amen!'s, as did others.

"When I was older, it was worse than ever. My face would want to look at a girl, but I knew I didn't dare for I would wind up staring at her. I could almost feel myself start to sweat over fighting my head's wish to turn and look. It's a horrible thing, Penny. Horrible! That fight went on in me for so many years. It was unbearable when I had to take a shower after gym classes. I knew I was headed for a mental breakdown.

"When I was at the club that time, my heart nearly sank into the ground when I had to leave because of that woman. If it hadn't been for Ariel coming out to me, I don't know what might have happened, I was in such a state. I was desperate to meet someone like you, Penny, and I was lucky I did, but how many others like me are still out there, fighting this as best they can? I hate it, Penny. God, I hate it with such an anger. It's like Liv getting all riled up at how Hypatia was treated, but they're just about doing the same thing now, only different, they're tearing our souls apart, skinning them and slowly pulling us apart."

She started crying, and as soon as she did, I moved towards her.

"No, Penny. Please, no. I don't want to leave from where I am. I have to hold you like this. Don't make me quit. Please," she implored me, hugging her face to my vaginal lips. There was nothing I could do, nothing that I wanted to do but allow her to be as she was. What I did do was to hold her warm, moist lips to my face too, kissing her every now and then, and taking a small lick of her love juices that I couldn't permit to go to waste. Not oddly, Caryn didn't lick my pussy, just held it tightly to her face. My heart was going out to her, heavy with love I couldn't give to her just then, but at last she fell asleep holding me. I did the same.

* * * *

When we awakened, we were both better, if more loving with each other than usual. We visited Sally and Ariel, and found Mary there too. It was a good visit, much of the talk surrounding Liv and her partner, Paula. Paula had affected us all much as Caryn had affected me.

During the week, we were still mindful of that last class, and wondering more about what was to come next. During the evening, we read, talked about how it was in the early church, how they put it all together—what could they do with Constantine's sword at their necks? But we wondered how much those early church father's had poisoned the well with all of their incessant fighting, and more, their assuming so much about how and what God was. They were like little children playing make-believe; grown up child prodigies, I guess you could say, but people took them very seriously.

Seeing this all as we spoke, it was as if we'd discovered that we lived among aliens, or maybe it was we that were the aliens. When one thinks about it with the sense of knowing that we had, one has to find it a very strange feeling. I know that I did. Caryn and I read several books, definitely not what Liv had called the me-too books.

* * * *

Paula was with Liv. Naturally, we all hugged and kissed her. Ariel spun her magic again, but with Caryn's help, and had her sit with us, but then Liv started to speak.

"It's true. I don't think much of the God that this bible pushes. It's not that I don't believe in a god, it's that if there is one, this one isn't it. Why? Annie, would you do the honors again? Read from the gospel according to Matthew, chapter 6, verses 25 and 26, please. Rachel, will you follow along and see if the NSRV agrees with what Annie is reading?"

Annie read it, and Rachel, as always, nodded in agreement.

"I've always considered this a couple of verses that tell of a gentle, loving, and caring God, a personal God that truly was good and kind. Do any of you get any other type of feelings from this?"

How could we? We knew we were being set up, but Liv was right so far, and we knew she would be right again in a minute too.

"If you will again, Annie, find Deuteronomy, Chapter 2, verses 31 through 34."

After she'd read them, Liv looked as if shocked, her mouth wide open. "Destroyed men, women, and children? Not a single survivor? Surely that can't be right. No, of course not. I must have the wrong passages. Annie, read Deuteronomy 20, verses 10 through 18. Yes, I'm sure that'll be better," she faked her dismay beautifully. We knew the next one wouldn't be any better.

Annie read it.

"Offer the towns you intend to take over terms of peace, and if they don't accept, 'you must not let anything that breathes remain alive.'? That can't be so. Rachel, I should have checked with you on the first one."

"It matched. They both did."

"They did?" she asked as if disbelieving. Annie and Rachel nodded, but with smiles on their faces.

"Hmm, how can the god Jesus described be the same god we just read about? Can it be so? If yes, then how can it truly be that one describes him as a caring, loving god, and another not so nice at all, one who commands his people to commit genocide? Genocide is what it is, isn't it?"

Liv was a good faker as she looked around in pure disbelief.

"Well, darn, I guess it is so. So what does this tell us?" None of us dared try to answer, though why, I couldn't exactly say. "That it was men—it had to be men, for no god could have two diametrically opposed sides. God, if there is a god, could not be schizophrenic, or be a multi-personality like we just heard read by Annie. Then too, we've seen how Noah's ark had two different versions of what all went into it, and that can only be if men did the writing. God couldn't possibly not know that plants need sunlight to grow, to flourish, nor that gravity held the earth in a particular orbit. There have been other things we've gone over that indicate the same thing, that men wrote the bible, and not any god. I'll talk more about this later.

"And the other obvious question is why hasn't anyone said anything about this before? That's easy—Zeitgeist! We know, understand without asking, that we're not supposed to ask, so we don't, we just naturally go along with it. We're born to be obedient, and that's good, but only up to a point. Why is it good? Because if it's not, as long a time as it takes us to develop and be on our own, we get into all kinds of trouble by not obeying our parents who generally try to make sure we grow up to where we can make our own decisions as living adults. But then there's culture, and it, too, uses that obedience, but often without a care or worry that parents normally have.

"Many times how we're made to be eventually runs against what is best for us. Some of us get it, most of us don't—we just keep obeying and not questioning, especially in things like religion that tell us about the god that made us all, and we must eventually answer to in order to avoid hell in eternity. God never changes: he's the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow, many have said. Some things are more to be obeyed without questioning than other things, and god is one of them for god is supposed to always have been, so god never changes, therefore what we're taught about god never changes.

"Okay, maybe this is the final piece to why some questions are never asked," she said, holding up a bible. "Annie, not picking on you, but I've called on you so often, please tell me if you've ever read the whole bible, and if not, why not."

Annie grinned. "Uh-uh. Never thought of it."

"Rachel?"

"Nope, me either."

"Has anyone read the whole bible?" We all shook our heads. "Do you think that it might be because there's too much there? Or maybe it's too hard to follow? Or how about: doesn't seem to make sense to you?"

"It doesn't," Caryn said. "Now that you make us look at it, I tried to get my answers there, but it seemed hopeless."

"To be honest with all of you, I haven't read the whole bible either, and neither had Paula. We have read a lot about it lately, but we had help in understanding it. That help came in the form of reading those books I've recommended to you by people, some of them who have had training in them, who did dare to question what they were supposed to have not only learned, but accepted without question. My, my, what would I, we, ever have done if someone hadn't done much of this for us. Personally, I'm grateful to them. Now I understand what before only left me feeling confused and lost.

"I'm not the only one, if I read between the lines. Karen Armstrong, in her book, says that Martin Luther was astonished when he first saw the whole bible. Martin Luther was born in 1483, and died in 1546. Since the bible wasn't printed until about 1452, I don't know how it was presented to him, but she tells us that he was shocked that it contained so many writings. If he was shocked, what can we expect the other clerics to have thought?

"How can we not be lost and confused if we try to go it alone? We'll see, as already has been pointed out, that traditions have been modified, added to, changed, and, of course, there's always that little thing about a mean and genocidal god versus the good god. It doesn't make it easier to understand the bible.

"Here's an interesting tidbit provided by Karen Armstrong in her book: she says the Hebrew bible wasn't settled on until after 158 A.D. in Usha in Lower Galilee. It seems they may have had some trouble understanding too. That makes it over seven hundred years that they didn't have it together. That's taking it from the time of the Babylonian exile to then. Was that because the people were illiterate and needed someone to point out what they were to know? As in Ezra and Nehemiah?

"Speaking about interesting things, recall that I said a bishop of Rome tried to say Rome was the ruling bishopric over all of Christianity about 257, if I remember correctly, or thereabouts. Of course, he probably died right after that. I wondered if that particular city wasn't getting too proud of itself back then.

"Well, wouldn't you know it—somewhere along the line, Constantine was said to have given the bishop of Rome what is called the 'Lateren palace. Remember me saying that? Uh-huh, a palace. Now don't you think that didn't turn their heads some? Put all of this together, and you'll quickly see how it did suddenly make them from a peace loving, kind, and gentle people into a proud, possessive, power hungry bunch, enough so that they felt they could have a bishop killed in Spain, and it not even being the 400s yet.

"Yes, these guys put on airs, and took all the power they could, including killing the most intelligent person on the planet, Hypatia. Is that how it went; that they put on airs all of a sudden, things to befit their new status as leaders for god on earth? Maybe so. Let's see, there's an old book, The Two Babylons, by a Reverend Alexander Hislop. Though this man had an ax to grind, he also had the impertinence to suggest that the miter the pope and bishops wear is actually a 'mitre of Dagon', who was a god of the Philistines, and possibly the Babylonians and more. The mitre, or miter, is the hat that looks like a dunces hat, but it has two tails on it that go over the shoulder. We certainly know that neither Jesus nor his apostles wore anything like it. Hislop indicates that excavations in Ninevah show this particular hat, but it has longer tails to resemble the fish god, Dagon. And guess what? You can find all kinds of sites on the Internet showing just that, including picture proofs of it.