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Jackson gripped my arm as I attempted to push past him. There was hardness his eyes, but also compassion and kindness. "It won't do any good." He said softly. "The drugs have already done any damage that is going to be done and metabolize quickly. Your body has already suffered the damage it is going to incur. It's really just a matter of if it kills you or not. You can go to the hospital, but it's still just a waiting game. Here or there makes no difference."
I whirled around now really angry. "But of course it was important to talk to us before you mentioned this little 'wrinkle' right? I mean what if we didn't cooperate fully knowing we could keel over in the middle of questioning. Wouldn't look good not to get the full report would it." I was pissed off. How could these people act like this.
Mclean said reasonably, "It really won't make any difference one way or the other. What's done is done."
I turned on her savagely. "Fuck you. Maybe you would feel differently if you were the one who drank that spiked screwdriver last night. You fucking cunt." I had never felt hate so strongly as I did for that woman in that moment.
I slammed the door on them hard.
I trembled at revelation as I looked at Rachel. I pictured both of us face down in a sopping mess of our own blood and vomit. The image had a premonition quality to it, and the hairs on my neck stood up in fear.
Rachel and I sat down, neither able to speak, and waited for death or redemption.
The End?
Your comments will determine the future of this series. Please let me know if you wish these stories to continue or if the time has come to let Sara and company leave this imaginary world for another.
Whatever you decide, please tell me why in your comment, or send me an email.
Thank you, and should we not meet again. The pleasure has been all mine.
Sara.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousalmost 19 years agoI am a BIG fan. You can't end this. These people are a part of life now, for many of us. What happened to Michelle and Moolee? Did Rachel go home to see mom and did Mom find a new Rachel. Did the girls get sick?
As you can see, I'm captivated. you've done well.
Anonymousalmost 19 years agoI have read all of your work from the first, and look forward to no other series on the site. I would hate to think that I would not be able to read any more from you, but I'm not sure if this is the right story to continue or not. The "X" story line has been on the borderline of unbelievable, with the FBI twist the hardest to swallow.
I think you need to decide for yourself if there is more story left here or not. I find that anytime I don't follow my own inner compass, I get lost without a map out of the woods. Follow your gut. If you find a topic you have great knowledge and passion about, write it. Maybe that is "The Game", maybe not.
Regardless of your future decision, PLEASE do not quite writing. The development and thought you are able to put into the characters and story make it much better. I guess it's kind of like sex being better when you have feelings for your partner. If you choose write in other areas, let us know. I know I will read it... Decide to continue on here? I'll be reading too.
Anonymousalmost 19 years agoI have really enjoyed reading your series, in fact, it is the only one series on this site that I read regularly. I would check back frequently waiting for updates and if they didn't come every month, I would be disappointed. And while I enjoy murder mysteries as much as the next person, that is not why I read Literotica. If you must resolve this current plot line, then so be it, but please do so quickly and take us back to the Game.
And if not, thanks for the many hours of enjoyment. You are a skilled erotician.
Anonymousalmost 19 years agoAs soon as you begin to listen to yourself create fabulous rose gardens in your mind - stop it. [As in your preceeding and following commentaries. Step outside yourself and read them again for value.]
At this point, please realize you should be proud but don't get carried away. Subplots aren't verbotten if you know your subject and it's details. This last chapter was a wing and a prayer - however before being angry notice the score given it. The good new one's (U) get a Mulligan as it was earned.
Your apt words and deliberated scenes prior to this chapter were believeable enough to carry strong interest and I don't mean just the sex. However, the Osama bin Chicago X owner was a real stretch with his drug research network and non-interpreteable transmissions - come on. Not a sin - just a blip on the learning curve. Research and know and feel the credibility before commiting to a new direction.
A lesser author wouldn't get this level of feedback as thier work wouldn't warrant it. You have strong talent and will make mistakes and will go on and learn from them.
You have the talent to develop skills to go far beyond this site (if you wish) after making more mistakes - learning - changing. If you have a good editor, I think you went here (chapter 9)against thier recommendation. This is not a race. Take your time - be comfortable with your offering. Are you following your scripted general plot outline? Winging it should be fully considered as beneficial and within your comfort zone of subject knowledge.
Your following is developed by earned respect from a credible effort - that is your product and your worth.
I think you are surprized by your products acceptance. I'm not. But stay focused. Discipline and imagination and hard work and talent got you here.
Oh, enough already - shrug it off - have fun - learn - keep entertaining us. with high Regard
