All Comments on 'The Honey Trap'

At about the third page I'd had enough of the presented personality of the primary character. all the stammering, the blushing, the self-doubt, the self-deprecation, the bumbling and stumbling.......I just couldn't spend any more time with this. I supposed your characterization of the main character was intentional. I hope it worked for you and you've gotten a high score and favorable comments. I confess to not being a fan of the "bumbling fool" persona. Yes, it's my problem.

How anyone can like this I don't know, it was a good idea trashed by a so so writer.

Oh, and by the way, it's 'couldn't care less' not 'could care less', think about it.

I expected this story to be really good from the reviews. It is absolutely trash. The MC is so pathetic if I was his wife I would leave him too. He had to hire a escort to get revenge and even that was lame. Where is the revenge? Just awful story writing. Probably hoping to publish on Amazon with all the other third rate writers.

Wonderful story. Like others, I'd like a follow on story about Rhiannon. And a Penny and Michael story. Perhaps this I'd the mark of a great writer, to be able to create such great characters that we want more of the characters' stories.

Unfortunately, this story was written in 2012, and it looks like the author's last submission was in 2015. So it's not looking good for any follow-up. Too bad.

One of my favorites.

Thank you for a great story!!!

I think Rhiannon is the heroine of your story.

Please us more about her and how she ended up as a escort.

Thanks for a great story!!! Well done!!!

I agree with the comnent that we would a story for Rhiannon to find her love. If you feel up to it!!!!

All the best and we look forward to Rhiannon story(ies)

Great story!

Thank you for this wonderful revenge story. If my wife had ever done this to me, I would have dug deep and found a woman like Rhiannon. I have read several of your stories and loved them all. Keep up the great updates work.

Wow. Just... wow.

Thank you for the story. That was actually an awesome revenge story.

Just a lovely story. Very well written and the ending was perfect! 5*

Amazing!

Loved it.

Especially that last line.

:)

Well done!

4 Stars as their is no way she will give back that money , I have been around the world and they never ever give the money back

Good stuff!

Second time I've read this, iit just gets better. Thank you again.

Would love to see a sequel wherein Rhiannon also finds true love. She deserves it.

Fun but beautiful

Second read and it's still out standing! cd

Отличная история!

My third read of this tale but my first comment. I give it a fav and 5-stars because I just flat enjoy reading it.

A really fantastic story.

A great story, I enjoyed it.

Ha! I was actually rooting for Rihannon!

VERY nice story. Could see the ending a mile away but it was still so satisfying. 5 stars and a Big thank you!

Very improbable, BUT I still enjoyed it a lot. The nature of good fiction, in this instance romantic fiction, and it's not even my favorite genre. But liked the angle of women defending their friend or mate. That is what marriage is supposed to be about: having your mate's back. And I don't mean "mate" in the Commonweath sense either. My wife and I married decades ago in grad school and always had each other's back in every sense, sometimes in difficult circumstances. That is love, as in loyalty, fidelity, and trusted intimacy. That you found an awesome partner who you can trust always and absolutely. If that makes me a 'romantic', then so be it. The author here captures it well.

Great payback BTB story.! Excellent read, wonderful ending! 5*

what a awesome story. not what i thought it was going to be but I really enjoyed it

I was looking for a hot story, but this, although l guessed the ending quite quickly, was a delight to read. Simply, thank you for writing it

Outstanding story!! I think there could be a couple alternate endings written like February Sucks. . One in which Michael has Rhianaa for one night to celebrate and another where Rhihana and Michael end up together! On the first alternate ending he still ends up with Penny but since they haven’t begun a relationship yet it’s not cheating.

I had almost forgotten how much I loved this story and the wonderful and devious way it plays out. It really brought my spirits up which is what I needed badly tonight so once again, thank you for writing something that means so much to me.

GG

Georgia is not a no fault state. I sued for adultery and alienation of affection, and abandonment. Who ever wrote this must not live here needs to do more research before writing about things you don't know. It will save you from looking like an ass. Hiring a highend escort to trick the man who slept with his wife was dumb. Yes hire the escort to help get over her but it's better to get revenge buy kicking the guys ass. Why does everyone write such pathetic losers who can't handle their business with other men? As long as you don't kill the guy or cripple him the cops will hardly care who beat his ass especially if there are no witnesses or you provoke him into attacking you. It's self defense then and then you can cripple him. Get it on film though, that's what my buddy did and he got away with it. Cops don't like guys who sleep with other people's wives either.

@justbobkc Re: That woman and Daryl Hannah. Just because SHE happened to see her not at her best doesn't mean that most people don't consider her a beauty.

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"it just happened." - Sigh, it doesn't JUST happen. You may "just happen" to feel an initial attraction, but if you're in a committed relationship you don't act on it.

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I still don't see how her taking ALL the savings, PLUS the entire business that he helped fund, while he gets the house, which may or may not be paid for, is a fair division of assets.

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"I had to do what was right for me." - Fine, so ask for an amicable, fair (which despite what his lawyer said I don't think this was, unless there were other assets that weren't talked about) divorce BEFORE chearing.

This was quite nice. Short but sweet. Although I would've like to have read a bit of an after scene between Penny and the MC. I kinda expected the revenge plot to have lated a bit longer too.

Well done Sir. A great story. Any chance I could buy the film rights ?

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Fun story. good job

What happened if Michael realizes that he has a special feeling for Rhiannon and only a sister love for Penny.. Will he look for Rhiannon and leave Penny behind?

Lived it.

Excellent read this twice now gets better each time

Great fun story!! Thank you!!

Now THIS is how it is done!! I would make it 10 stars if I could! Thank you!

;-) A well-written and charming tale. Thanks for a fun read! Good job!!!

It got my 5 stars.

Been a fan of yours for a long time...this on was way fun...the whore with the heart of gold...you know, I've met a couple of those traveling thru life. It's not always business before pleasure, some times it's just pleasure...a fling a dalliance or whatever you want to call it. It was just for fun, sometimes over a coupla years and one stayed in touch with me for a long time and we met several times while I was traveling thru her state...one of my best memories. Looking back, I would probably have married her and her me and I would trust her implicitly cuz I knew where she was coming from. She might have continued to ply her trade but she told me once even if she did it was knowing that I loved her, that she had some stability who didn't care what she did, only cared about her. I have wonderful memories about her and things were free and easy for both of us...that was almost 40 yrs ago. A coupla yrs ago I wrote and asked how her life had went/gone whatever and she wrote me back, told me she'd married and had had a coupla kids and was happy but she said She would never forget me and I told her the same...actually one of my better memories and one of my better relationships. I nicknamed her Sugar drawers cuz it grossed out her room mate at the time..she loved the name and the effect it had on people so no matter where we went or with who, thats what I always called her and when we met new people I'd call her that and she'd giggle and squeeze my arm and a kiss one the cheek...She was well and truly a good friend and a great fuk buddy. Hadn't thought of her for a while but some how this story brought her back to mind...Sugar drawers....yeah thats who she was.

This story is ridiculous. Hiring an escort to trick a moron his wife was cheating with was 1980's level of goofy. Should have hired a couple of thugs to break his knees. Cheaper than a high-end escort and much more satisfying revenge wise. Hire the escort to get over the wife but the MC didn't even sleep with her. Pathetic storytelling about a wimpy man who couldn't handle a bully at his tennis club. Good thing he wasn't bullied by a man at the local hockey club he would have craped his pants. Sorry but all those saying story was really good have really low standards.

This is a perfectly-written story totally devoid of all the silly memes, tropes, and clichés that suck the life out of good storytelling. It's easy to see why this writer has 3K+ followers. The only mystery is why OP lets his work go for free, but we should not orally examine this free equine specimen.

Awesome story! 5 stars definitely! Thank you for the enjoyment!

Wow, outstanding! I love it when a plan comes together and the good guys win. 5*

I love this story! Well told!

Damn Melanie was cold. Takes everything but leaves the wedding album. That right there shows she didn't give a shit, despite what she said while they danced later (had some good times, yada yada). How the hell did they last 10 years? What a bitch. I don't understand how people can do that to someone they supposedly love, but I suppose that's part of why it's so shocking (and makes for a good read). She got what she deserved in the end, although some would say she didn't get enough.

"You should have gone into politics." She just smiled and winked at me. "In my line of work I'm only one step away." -- Alright, that was a genius exchange. You win. :)

Rhiannon was a gem. That gesture at the end was beautiful. I hope things work out for her. Glad Michael finds love in the end with Penny. Shame he had to waste 10 years with a bitch first.

Well done.

Good story, well written with a good plot and a nice ending. I'll be reading more of your stories. Thanks.

Well written, well conceived with a nice twist on a BTBx2 story (Burn the B..ch & Burn the Ba...rd) simultaneously so keep scribbling

A reread of this for me and is still as far as I concerned the very best burn story that's been written on here. I'd have loved another couple of pages on the aftermath dealing with how Melanie and Frank had to deal with the humiliation heaped upon them by what they brought on themselves for their actions. This is a story of the very highest quality and showcases just how revenge can and should be handled. Well done. BardnotBard

Don’t worry, small thinkers. Frank is gong to get his ass handed to him every time he steps onto the tennis court, which to a Neanderthal like Frank is FAR worse punishment than losing a piece of ass. He stole Michael’s wife because Mike beat him at tennis.

Read, think, learn…

To anotherchapter apparently you are only seeing what you wanna see instead of actually happened 1 sure it showed what Frank was but there was no humiliation 2 he only served to boast franks ego which all that does is going to cause him to keep doing it and he is going to try and do it again on Michael which is why penny needs to fall for it cause Michael needs to be taught a lesson for boosting a guys like that ego more than already was then maybe he will figure out he needs to destroy him and actually humiliate him and in public while doing the same thing to his former spouse there was no revenge against Frank in this story not much in the way of revenge against Melanie read the words the way they are written dont see what you want and then comment them on someone else's story you wanna see that write your own story about it

To finish my last comment he gets what he deserves for feeding franks ego instead of beating the losers ego into the ground with humiliation and to teach him a lesson and so he can actually get revenge on both sides instead of just 1

Ok so now that I have already commented on the bs divorce writings in the story my thoughts on the story is simple he didn't fully think through he revenge against them I mean seriously what they didn't don't bother Frank at all it just cost his ex a relationship so the revenge was 1 sided to handle guys like Frank in the manner that was chosen is too publicly humiliate him in doing that also includes the revenge on the ex as it still cost her relationship but it also humiliates her in public as well it will force them out of town and if done correctly it forces them to stay out of public in this regard all you did was played his ego and made it even bigger means his abuse isn't going to stop its going to keep happening and the other guy is at fault cause he played it instead stopping it next chapter should show Frank going after penny and as much as I hate to say this it should show penny doing the same thing as Melanie that way 2 things can happen 1 he gets what he de

Ok before I finish the story I'm getting sick of hearing how if a man goes to court to divorce his wife she will rape him in the divorce it's clear you don't research it let me tell you this while yes Georgia is a no fault state I'm assuming Georgia cause you said Atlanta and they were going to drive so safe to assume it with that being said again it is a no fault state however they do take account on the reason for the divorce meaning to say sure she would get 50 percent of the assets same as him the house would be sold where she would get 40 percent of the final sell after the taxes meaning he gets the remaining 60 percent as far as allomony goes it would not be awarded due to a few reasons 1 they weren't married for 10 years 2 the grounds the divorce is being filed under the MC in this story needs to fire his lawyer cause it's clear he doesn't have his best interest at heart no way in hell does just keeping the house make it a better deal then what you would actually get from the courts he needs to hire a shark lawyer 1 who knows what there doing and who isn't scared to go against the court and return the file under adultery and then turn and sue them for mental cruelty which is present cause the other guy is already bragging about it and she is going along with it which means she can be charged for the same thing its simple if you are going to write something like this be realistic do fuck it up by writing a bunch of bullshit about what happens in a divorce cause only those without common sense is going to buy that bs myself I have common sense but I also know about family law which divorce falls under that i would inform my client to fight it under the grounds of adultery then I would do 1 better and demand the old adultery law that is still on the books in Georgia be upheld which means he gets everything and she gets 6 months jail time as well as the person she cheated with I'm a retired lawyer out of Texas but before moving to Texas I was linced to practice family law in Georgia

Truly one of the great ones! 5*****

Story was great. I only have one problem with most stories like this. They tend to end so abruptly. I get that it is supposed to leave it in the mind of the reader to complete the story to suit themselves but I guess I just prefer a little more story at the end. If that makes any sense.

Still love the story all the same. This is in no way a slight to the talent of the writer. It's just me putting in my 2 cents.

Interesting. The anon comments below were even more interesting. Obviously by a Neanderthal knuckle dragging red neck! “The only correct response is violence.” All the imagination of a WWF wrestling fan. The idea of humiliation and emotional retribution obviously flew right over Anon’s head. No surprise there! The escort idea was actually funny and served its purpose well. Both the ex-wife and good old Frank were shown up for what they were, shallow cheating scumbags. He got Penny. Good trade and left his morals intact.

The whole story is dumb sorry but hiring an escort when can hire thugs to cripple the whole is a lot less expensive and more satisfying as far as revenge. The escort willing to make him her man? Seriously? If that was the authors idea of doing that to make it seem his character wasn't that big of a loser. Guess what it did make him look like the loser and his wife was right to dump him. The whole scenario with the escort was badly thought out. The author writes well but the storytelling sucks big time. Storytelling is an art you either have it or you don, this author obviously doesn't.

Truly enjoyable

I don't think he could be called a pussy honestly. I wouldn't haven't fought for a girl that didn't want me anymore either if they cheated. I probably wouldn't have done the honeytrap though. It's obvious Frank would've cheated eventually I would've much rather focused on someone like Penny after straightening my head out

There's not much sex, but it is a great read. I loved it, 5 stars!

Well done engaging read. 10 out of 10 would read again 👍

Great story 5 star

I knew what was coming when he hired Rhiannon. Just needed the details to the end. 5/5

Who’s Marlene?

Great story 👏👏👏👏

Pussy of a husband

The four unopened envelopes are a bit too much for me and cost you 1 *.

wife and grand daughters in wal mart this was a great way to pass the time

This is my favorite story that I have read on this site. Well written. Excellent characters, and I am a sucker for a happy ending.

5 stars, but why the bloody heck did Penny allow that thieving skank sleep in her house in the end? Forget karma and ethics, at least she should be worried the bitch will steal her stuff!

Terrific!!!!! Great story. Thoroughly enjoyed all the twists.

Feel sorry for Rhiannon, would love a follow up story where she finds love after all. 5*

Great story, FM I loved it. It sparked a memory because my girlfriend in college tried the same thing on me except she used it for a fidelity test. She did her homework, I'll give her that. While I was sanding the hull of my boat for a fresh coat of paint she started asking me all these types of questions. One being to describe my perfect woman and then she started to ask more questions on the subject. I really didn't think anything about it. We had been going out for almost two years and she reasoned that we should move in together for practical reasons. After one month of living together she asked me if I knew how to fix a screen. She told me that her old landlord refused to give back her security deposit until she fixed the screen her cat damaged. I told her I could look at it after class today. I looked at it, measured it, took the spline out and removed the shredded screen. As I was installing the new screen a young woman came to the door in her pink bathrobe introducing herself as the new roommate and if I wanted some coffee when I finished. She fit the description I gave my girlfriend almost perfectly which I chalked up to coincidence until she started coming on to me by putting her foot in my lap saying, "Aren't my feet ugly with all those callouses?". After the coffee and just talking for over an hour I just came right out and asked her if that's what was going on here? She had the decency to blush and tell me the truth but added that if it made a difference she was really attracted to me. God, now what do I do? My girlfriend was gone, I don't play games when it comes to relationships but she did a fantastic job of finding my perfect woman. Her personality, looks, intelligence, honesty plus she was a Dance major. I love to dance, I even had a few lessons when I was younger, courtesy of my mother. She was already dancing professionally (ballet) in her senior year but I couldn't overlook that she participated in the deception/ fidelity test so I thanked her for her honesty and left, telling her I had some house cleaning to do.

I know it's not as good as FM's but his reminded me of the first time I met my wife. Still wish you were writing FM

So many twists, so well done. I think everyone except Rhianna got what they deserved. 5*

A good epilogue would have Frank going home unknowingly with a well equipped transvestite who wanted to be 'serviced'. THAT could have been comedic.

a perfect story - thank you!!

Really good story. I was hoping they’d play tennis again and Michael wood destroy the big asshole.

You know what? Weirdly, I'd have liked to see Rhiannon end up with Michael. ...that may or may not have been influenced by me watching Pretty Woman last week. (Don't judge me 😛)

Good but feels unfinished. Definitely burnt the bitch but would have loved to see the bastard burnt as well, especially in a physical sense and the bastard did have a dodgy knee, definite scope to capitalise on that

Damn good story !!!

I remember reading it but didn't leave a comment. Great story!

5

Loved the story and how it ended. Just wish I had bet some money that it was a gay bar that Rhiannon sent Frank to, lol. Maybe he'll find he likes leather and chains.

Escorts like fortune tellers………they NEVER give back money. R. H.

Excellent, well told story, well done.

If a beautiful smart and sexy escort was willing to give up the life to be loved I don't see how the story would have ended like this. Most escorts dream of being a trophy wife content to be rich very few actually realize to be loved is a far richer life. I certainly would not have turned down the escort if she was really wanting a real loving relationship and getting out of the business. I think the ending would have been better if the escort was just about business, not that she had to be cold hearted just more professional. Giving all the money back unless she and the MC became a couple was very unrealistic.

"Frank and Marlene"??

The prostitute with a heart of gold 🥲

I liked it a lot even though some things were far fetched. The very end was too far. Call girls never work for free, not even to save the world.

Fiction is so much easier to manipulate and control than real life, sadly............

But a great story !

Rapier

Purely FUCKING BRILLIANT!!! I loved every minute of it and the ending was wrapped in pure perfection.

Absolutely OUTSTANDING

This story was awesome! It held me from start to finish and was very well written. Great story with a happy ending. Thank you 5*

Wow, great ending too. In my mind Frank and Melanie get back together and live unhappily ever after… 5 stars.

Clever story and no one got hurt - physically.

Thanks!

-jog

What a lovely fairytale.