All Comments on 'The Quality of Her Tears'

Belongs in fetish or something. Has nothing to do with wives as they were not really married. Her consent was a lie.

Did not feel it was fair to score this as it was not a loving wives story.

Your writing skill is excellent by the way.

But this story is amazing. Wrong catagory? Perhaps; but once I started reading, I couldn't stop. Even now, I look forward to your next submission while wondering how you can equal this.

Thank you for an emotional and infuriating story.

rather complicated but better written then your previous efforts.

One thing I think you do rather well is to write absolutely hideous female lead characters and this was no exception. She really was horrific ! Thanks for writing this, must have been a lot of work.

The low rating of this story is proof that score has little to do with quality. The author is obviously highly talented and this is among the best writing I have seen on Lit. I suspect that some people confuse "erotica" with "porn" and are quick to hand down a one-star response if they don't read anything about a 12" cock pounding a pussy within the first ten paragraphs. Too bad, because they are missing out.

However I do agree that it is should have been published as "fetish" rather than "Loving Wife" though. There is a wife in the story, but the marriage has no significance in the plot.

Maybe your best - I Thank you!

i do apologize for the mistake that happened when this story was published. the 12 pages are all there is to it, there should not have been a Ch. 01 in the title.

thank you for reading and commenting.

...even tho I skipped some parts since I don't quite like the theme, but the writing and the story is very good.

there is no more mindless shallow women on earth than the one in this story

As well written as this authors stories are the female characters lack a soul and a heart. All they have is a vagina and after awhile its hard to feel anything but contempt for them. Once again well written but.....hard to identify with just a vagina

A previous commenter wrote about low scores because many people are looking for porn. While that might be true, the LW category has many BTB fans and this story does have a woman using marriage to ruin a man. Those people might be unhappy with the plot and thus vote the score down. Technically, the story was very good, suspenseful and well written. The plot though was not my cup of tea. So what's a fair score?

Usually I love your stories even if the subject matter is not up my alley.

Not this time. I found this to be overly long and boring.

I hope your next story will be like the previous ones.

to be in Literotica. It is too excellent! It would have been more fitting to have discovered this story first in a review in the N.Y. Times.

The writing is better than good: The plot, the clever asides, the language kept me enthralled.

I had an important appointment I cancelled at the last minute because I needed to finish reading this story.

This reader has admired Angiquesophie's writing for a long time, but this story makes my previous admiration a caricature. The very last line of this story (that it should have a "Chapter one" attached) made my face light up with a great smile.....I can't wait for chapter 2.

I red stories here from good authors that capture the readers attention and develop characters that have an emotional attachment, albeit sometimes that emotion is negative (hate). My chief complaint with this story were the two extremely diverse timelines the main characters worked through. Once I balanced that they were suddenly thrust together. I think that in your effort to hide the true subterfuge of the plot as long as you could the confusion and length made the read eventually become tedious. Again, the skill you used to prep the story was sold short by the simple, quick, neat and tidy ending. I have to say on a personal note that someone (Mia) who is so shallow and weak willed makes a character that is nearly impossible to like or cheer for. Simply an impossible ending to conceive. I do not disbelieve that they trained her "well" (or maybe better said successfully) but the fact that a baby's kick would wipe that all away. It went from dark drama to romance novel in half a page. Disappointing. She definitely got better than she deserved and why it will not score well.

This story is literally "Stockholm Syndrome" brought to life like a Frankenstein zombie. I didn't think I could feel much sympathy for a character like Mia before reading this, but you've basically created a character who was drugged, raped, beaten, abused and manipulated through her love into becoming a hollow shell of a woman. Her husband becomes a cheater in his own right, and a nihilistic self-absorbed tool to boot, pretty much beaten into a hollow nothing as well.

Mia was right when she named them all losers.

Maybe when they have nothing left, they can start over from the beginning and give an innocent child a future. Who knows?

Despite the seriously dark tone and mostly unlikeable characters, great story.

Totally unsatisfactory story and story-ending. Mia is a real piece of work. She’s truly mentally deranged and despicable. No sane person would live the way she did. She solicits not an inch of sympathy or pithy. Carl should have run away as fast as he could or simply divorced her for abandonment. She’s a slut and has proven her untrustworthiness over and over. She can’t be trusted. As to loyalty: as she slept with both his father and brother, he should dump them from his lie as well. Carl should try to exert his revenge on both his family, Mia and those French crooks. But he should never have chosen her. She’s beyond redemption.

Too good for Lit/LW. Just pearls before swine. Keep writing but disable comments. You don't need the contamination.

Everything this author does is dark and challenging. The men are wimps or heartless villains and the women are terrifying. I was not sure I could take this one but decided that since it was Ch. 01 I could try it for taste. Perhaps AngiqueSofie could fool us by writing a beautiful romance or even a humorous story! Then I discovered that it was 12 pages, but it was sort of like a Dan Brown thriller and I could not stop.... TU AS!

You have incredible talent. That said, I'm not sure I really enjoy reading your stories. But it kept me reading until the end, and I hope you post more.

It has been along time . . . I still marvel when I read your stories. I still have not posted the story you proofed for me but think it is time, even if it is simplistic. Your works are complex, deep, mysterious . . . like life itself. The years I spent in Paris was in the Latin Quarter. Very good memories. Thanks.

oh my god.

It is Hard to fully say how totally awful these 12 are. Its Agony

On the technical side of things the writing is extremely fine and the story despite its length moves along pretty quickly. The character development is outstanding.

But as with most of this authors work.. the plot flat out sucks moose cock. As with the other long stories that this talented writer has written A NEW A and DELICATE BALANCE or A TALE OF IMMORALITY ..LOVE IS A SILK BLIND FOLD... The women / wives are ALL extremely hot totally either immoral or amoral.. deviously twisted and without any sort of social conscience whatsoever. They could in fact the guards added NAZI concentration camp.

And once again all the men/ husbands are sophisticated successful man without the slightest bit of intelligence whatsoever. The super hot wife has a pussy therefore it's time to stop thinking.

Frankly this sort of boilerplate type of story from this author is beginning to be a little Boring with a capital B .

There are some who think that this author does not think much of women since all of her wifes in the LW Genra are essentially the same. But I beg to differ... I think this is about how stupid mentally undeveloped straight men are .

for example in EVERY one of angiquesophie LW stories EVERYONE we see this or something like this

"I never cheated on you," she said. "I lied a lot, but I didn't cheat; not as you understand it. If I did cheat, it was on Jean-Luc, because I already was his woman before you and I met. This will hurt you, Carl, but I know it was him I truly loved, even back when we married. It's still him I love now."

classic arrogant european double talk and bullshit.

It does not work in A NEW A and DELICATE BALANCE

It does not work in A TALE OF IMMORALITY

It does not work in ..LOVE IS A SILK BLIND FOLD...

It does not work in TRUE LOVE

It does not work in TWO's a CROWD

it never occurs to this author to have the idiot slow witted knuckle dragging hetero men spit in their wife's faces. Instead he HAS to ... just had to listen listen... to his cunt whore evil mentally ill wife or ex-wife explain things.

Anyone who blindly criticizes this story is a moron, and unfortunately on this site, there are many of them. Wonderfully written and in all ways way beyond the normal standards of most stories posted here (including mine, I have to say, without any hesitation). Mind blowing! I'm still trying to come to terms with it, and is this really only chapter 1?

Too many leaves for the branches to support.

For a while I thought this was kind of a Story of O rip off. Then we get to the part about the forged signatures and forged paintings and to be honest I got lost. I don't understand how destroying Carl's reputation benefited the evil Frenchmen. As for Mia I found nothing redeeming or even interesting in her character, again, kind of an O rip off.

your always been a gifted writer and I always start reading your stories. unfortunately your mind does not allow you to write anything else than extreme, crude, self-destructive stories where the characters are just a bunch of dead brains.

I'm very sorry if you think anything like this is close to erotic and if you have only this dark side you like I'm even more sorry. It is like you wrote, not even your beauty can help you in this case.

as for britease , no not everything that is good written is good, in this case it's just fucked up and if you think it's erotic, why do you ever publish a story ?

and to Harryin VA, your analysis is the best I've read from you. It's sad that every single story of her is plain sick and always repeating from the other stories before, clones so to say. some might wonder who fucked her up so much that never anything else comes out of her brain.

This is a totally engrossing and superb story told by a professionally competent writer.

I've been reading some of the comments and it seems to me that the readers didn't get that Jean'Luc and his Papa didn't keep Mia as a hostage. They broke her and then trained her, effectively remaking her to fit their needs. It is not that Mia is a bad person, it's that she was made a doll who followed her masters orders. It's like saying a Tiger that eats a gazelle is a bad animal, it is not. It is its nature, Mia's nature was altered and at the end the author gave us a glimpse of her 'rebirth'.

Like most of your writing, this story has a female lead who imposes tremendous hurt and betrayal on a man that loves her. This time you explore the whole notion of conditioning to make Mia's actions comprehensible. I like the chances you took in cutting the story back and forth between the two leads and the narrative that Mia has in her head.I really appreciate the effort to write something sophisticated and compelling. Please keep writing !

Writing is like painting. A good painter can paint a superb picture of very bad house; a bad one will paint an awful picture of a good looking house. They may cursorily look same. However, when you look a moment longer and find the masterful strokes and finishing and coloring versus sloppy ones, it clicks instantly. Technically, the author is very, very skillful but she is drawing a good picture of bad characters. A lot of dribbles; but again some time they are necessary evil, they help to show the jumbling and reeling feelings inside the characters.

The author in this beautiful piece indeed tried to invoke sympathy for Mia. And in my case failed. I pity her but can’t empathize. She was broken, brain washed, conditioned and used despicably. The child inside her did finally awaken her. But, nobody can be conditioned to the extent she had been, without the already present deep-seated kernel of that in her character. A person will rather snap and go totally insane if forced, however subtle and persistent the coercion is. And nobody can snap out of it so easily like she did. Hell, she was referring to Carl as a gnat only a moment before. It will probably take years and years of counseling and medications. From what they have gone through, they are better apart, in my opinion. But again it’s my opinion and others might not think the same. Anyway, a very good writing, made me think of things out of my deepest demons and hell. Thank you.

While I appreciate the writing, I've known far too many so-called Masters and Slaves to find yours credible. Write me a slovenly loser of a Master and it'd be believable just as most Slaves are pathetic creatures playing a role only so someone--anyone--will find them interesting.

And don't get me started on French masterminds. There's an oxymoron if I ever saw one.

Overall, moderately amusing, but you've done far better work.

I appreciate your work and enjoyed the story. It puts me a bit in mind of "The Story Of O". Thanks.

I think my first reaction to your story was that this was an exercise in how many words you could use to covey a single thought. Word after word of nothing but words. Mechanically correct but meaningless to the ideas you attempted to convey. Way too long for the story or the study as some have called it. This might have been a good 5-6 page story.

Interesting plot, good character development, original storyline, gut-wrenching betrayal, hope for redemption, effective dialogue, great pacing, and on and on and on....oh yeah, and some eroticism, too.

One of the shining authors of LW. I don't find most of AS's stories enjoyable, as such, but I actually really relished reading this one. Captivating.

Thanks both for sharing this entertaining story and for generally showing other authors what they should shoot for.

I can't even really critique the extended backstory and the repetitive nature of the dual-narrative, since the former was really necessary to understand the characters and was nicely woven and the latter did bring a lot to the tale.

There was so much information for the author to tell and when to tell it made the flow of the story to sometimes become stalled.

Jumping from one character to the other was a bit confusing sometimes, but for the life of me, I don't see how it could have been otherwise written, and not be a jumbled mess.

Unless the reader is fluent in French, in which I am not, made it a bit confusing, and that may be just a deficiency of this reader.

I was sorry that there was no real winner in this story, but that mimics real life in some ways, and was saddened that Carl had to be tortured in so many ways by Mia.

I have to hand it to the author for weaving a very sadistic and evil web into this story and want to thank her for all of the work she has put into it.

Over all, I very much enjoyed the story and thought the storyline was top notch.

Thanks very much for all of the work in writing and editing of this fine story.

...I come to the same conclusion: I love HOW she writes and don't care much for WHAT she writes.

This story felt like a train of tragically misguided characters hurtling towards a cliff. Right from page 1, there was no redemption in sight and the plot got murkier every time you switched dialogue.

Your stories are truly unsettling, but the writing is superb. The characters are well written. We readers want to stop at page 1, to save us some heartache, but we read on like the ignorant fools we are. And finally... there is the inevitable train wreck where no one survives.

Keep writing. Your stories are unique, albeit disturbing.

The husband is the wimp who often bow down to pressure from wife lovers-but this one has a cliffhanger which like other writers like to do-an open invitation to a BTB writer-BTB writer now take charge.

Don't stop.

You write with a scalpel, while others use a hammer.

Thoreau wrote “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

And women.

He was discussing civil disobedience against unjust government. The relevance of governing ourselves is just as obvious

How utterly and ridiculously true.

Thank you

But I had to laugh at the title. How do you get a "one part series"? LOL.

Fascinating story, well thought out and written in better English, better spelling and punctuation and better self editing than many American and British writers offer us. Bravo! I shall continue reading your enjoyable stories as you continue writing them. Thank You!

Far to much detail.

4*

Why did I waste my time reading this??!! You write remarkably but please use it to write something with substance. This was utterly pointless

If it is rooted at all in truth, even more so. Nevertheless, had to rate a 4 due to a vague dissatisfaction with the ending and explanation of why Papa even wanted Carl to do more forgeries.

This had all the makings of a fantastic story. Why then did it leave me with this feeling of "emptiness" when I consider the flesh of the story? I've tried reading it when sad, again when happy. In both times this came across to me as a ghost of a tale. The mansion was vacant.

i found myself fast reading, first and last sentence of each paragraph, still no comfort. I look at a story the same way I do a film... entertain me..you did not. You did have a great start.. but quickly I was bored.

I wont give up just yet.. will take a look at another of your efforts.

the best place to look is within. TK U MLJ LV NV

Quick and to the point.

Too long by half. With 12 pages you should have made chapters.

No one to really like here. And you telegraphed the plot by the 4th page. N one believes in the hooker with the heart of gold. Also, I know quite a bit about the sex slave industry and everyone, every girl I ever saw there wanted out. And not one gave up inside where it mattered. Therefore, you are correct, this whore is what she was inside. As such, she will never really be a good mother.

The story left a really bad taste in my mouth in the end. Everybody is either deal or ruined. No one really likes those stories; they are far to close to real life. Allow us our illusions.

WAYYY to much French. Now, I speak French so I understood but most people don't and it was off-putting. Stick to English.

Last way to much detail. One of the first things we learn as writers is "Don't say it, show it". Allow dialogue to carry the story except when description in necessary.

Had to give you a 2 on this when in the past you are many times a 3-4 writer,

is fragments of the authors life. TK U MLJ LV NV a pen/pal note is coming, mlj

Wimp tale, Carl is despicable.

what a crap story

Why are many readers so afraid of it? They must be very bitter people.

Really well written 5*

It was too long and tedious to finish. I gave up on page 8. Your technical writing skills are great but the story lacks character development as I felt nothing towards the characters and could have cared less what happened to them.

This must be the worst story by a literate typist on the site.

This seemingly never ending drivel is over.

An outstanding scholar, but a perverted human being.

You did good. A lilittle long, but I liked the ending.

Too long on the build up but well written.

Needed more on the aftermath.

Too many loose ends left dangling.

His goddamned father and brother needed to be dealt with and those are only two loose ends of many.

"Could have cared less" = cared at least a little.

"Couldn't have cared less" = considered the subject beneath contempt or had no regard for.

The author deserves an automatic 5 for all her submissions. Her explorations of the darker side of life and love challenge all of us. Exactly what one should expect of a good author. Even in 12 Lit pages character development in a complex plot will inevitably suffer. At best these should be considered novellas not novels. Perhaps those demeaning the work of an excellent contributor should accept the gauntlet that her writings are and submit their own version.

I agree with the others, this needs a little more. His father and brother need to be punished severely The rest of the gang must be brought to justice and his career restored. Then a happy ending for the little family. (as good as it could possibly be under the circumstances)

This hurt to read. And I loved every second. Thank you.

People can't change. What she had was a severe personality disorder. With the help of a good therapist and a lot of time and effort she might have been able to alter her behavior. Even so, she would always have the disorder. Pregnancy has proven to alter the mothers brain significantly during pregnancy and for up to two years after the birth. Then she'd be back to the same old, fucked up, selfish whore that she always was. The only difference is that this time it would be her child's heart that she was breaking. Grim shit, but that is the way this story ALWAYS goes.

As far as the story goes, it was well written but wordy. The plot became tedious as the exploration of her psyche repeatedly went over the same ground. The end was irritating: He knew she never loved him, he knew it was all a set up, why stick around for the final gun battle? If he loved he, then he should have known that she'd be better off dead.

wannabe cucks like that cockless wonder-turd babble and squeal like they know how characters in actual writer's stories think and behave, demonstrating their entitled cluelessness to the world.

those eunuchs can't stop embarrassing themselves I guess, but at least it provides us a laugh at their expense - great writing = 5*

5 stars but it made me kind of sick.

You are nasty and do nasty things to your characters. I had to stop in the middle before I could start reading the second half. BUT it is your right as the author to make things go as you wish. You had me really emotionally invested in their well being, and that's the hallmark of a good story. I was ready to go out hunting Frenchmen.

Then you wrapped it up nicely so we can hope that things will get better. That's okay too.

You really do have talent. Congratulations!

. . . and after reading it again, I remembered how painful it was to read way back then. Painful, and just as before, I knew that I had to finish it, but I couldn't read it in just one sitting. I had to pause to catch my breath - to try to maintain my own reality. I thought that it was well written and quite compelling. Thank you again for your effort. 5* for an emotional and at times intense experience.

why isn't this in that category ? If an adult wants to participate in that bdsm shit then O.K. thats their decision. But to take a young woman off the street, drug her, subject her to all manner of torture, degradation and filth for the purpose of a financial scam. To destroy lives......Only one punishment for those french scum and they got it, too bad both father and son couldn't have got the same training for few years.....

not finished, did he regain his reputation, did he stay with her was Lagrange caught, yes wrong category, dark story. I think the author is depressed and wants all to join her in her misery. TK

man hating

Hard to follow. Very strange. Too long. Unsatisfying. Still gave it 3 stars for the dialog writing skills.

Angiquesophie is a master (or should I say mistress) of stories emanating from the dark, erotic underbelly of everyday life and the forensic examination of the human soul. Mia was broken by monsters, cherished by a simple man and saved by an unborn child. An extraordinary piece of writing - depressing, brilliant and strangely beautiful

LA

Is this brilliant? Really? One star

Is this brilliant? Really? One star

I meant to add that 'Pathetic' would follow 'depressingly'. Carl is pathetic. He's truly painful to read about. I couldn't care less about Mia, but fuck Carl

You can't blame people like cuntique for her illness. Don't you think she'd be at least somewhat sane, if that was an option she could pick? She's obviously refused medication, so that's one against her, of course. Perhaps the institution she's committed to allows Internet use for patients.

5 stars.

First and foremost I think this story should be in Mind Control, BDSM, or Fetis/Kink. While it is very well written, the very ending is lacking. There's really no closure. After 12 pages of reading I shouldn't have to guess if they do or don't start a real relationship. So overall I have to rate only 3 stars.

Angiquesophie

A few observations if I may. Firstly, I must agree with my fellow critic that the genre you chose for this particular tale was tantamount to misrepresentation. Secondly, as I read the story, especially the segments where the central female character is 'raped' and generally abused by the gang of French mafiosa, I couldn't help but notice the similarities between your descriptive prose and The Story of O. There are certainly points of similarity as per your portrayal of Mia's "training" and brainwashing as a submissive slut with O's training program. Thirdly, not one character was endowed with any redeeming traits. In short, certainly every male character was reduced to the basest of motivations. It was almost impossible for me to have any connection with the character of Carl. The same was true for that of Mia. Simply having her heavily pregnant did nothing to endear her to any discerning reader. Thirdly, you seem to have a love affair (pun included) with as many French words and phrases that you could squeeze into the interactions of your characters. Unfortunately, while French is considered one of the Romance languages, your use of it in this tale did little to elevate the basic plot; that is a battle between users, abusers and "victims". There was absolutely nothing remotely romantic about this story. BDSM and mind control - that's all it amounted to. Sorry, but this effort fell short for me anyway

Just totally absurd, not even slightly believable ⭐️

FTDS

Don't you run on. Is there an off button. This was a skimmer's dream and ultimately nightmare.

I can't believe I wasted my time reading this non story

You are easily one of my top 5, hell, top 3 favorite writers in this site, your writing just makes me drool every time.

But God, your stories are like a blade through the heart, someone throw me a band-aid. ^_^

People with dark minds are often exquisitely gifted for comedy, if you ever wanna branch out. I've seen you handle its nuances and subtleties before, so you'd be at home there and, on a more selfish note, it'd make reading your stories less like an exercise in masochism. :)

never intended to pierce your heart and hurt you (smile).

...and the divorce papers were finally signed.

Mia was last spotted behind the 7-11 sucking cock for crack money. Carl was found dead from two self-inflicted gunshot wounds to the back of his head. Seems a Russian mafioso took exception to the kiss from his wife.

Lagrange? Well he's still cursing his parents for being born into the barn family.

must be what a bad acid trip would read like only shorter. Story dragged on and on and on.

Of course, it's brilliantly done.

I read this story as Mia's Odyssey. She's the traveler out in the world. She's the one who endures terrible things, and survives her family, her men and herself to find a place to stand on terms meaningful to her. Carl could have crossed that line with her but chose to forego second chances. It's Mia at the end that finds meaning in a new life and her life and thereby moves on. How is that not Odysseus coming home to Ithaca?

It may be the best story on the site.

I wish I’d known what to expect.

You write quite well - nonetheless I feel shitty for having read as far as I did.

Your protagonist was raped and brutalized. So was I - by you.

You are not forgiven. You and your ugliness will not be returned to.

JMAS

I'm a reconciliation fan. Love me an ending where everyone is forgiven and they all live happily ever after. At the end of this story I hoped Carl would kick her in her pregnant belly, then walk away as she and the child died. Then he would hunt down and gut his father and brother.

I feel filthy in my heart now. This story made me loose a bit of my soul and I wish I had never read it.

For the record, rape is a shitty and terrible plot device, especially when it's as explicitly done as this one is... But it happens every day, exactly like this story and worse. I know pimps, real life pimps and the psychological manipulation they use is horrible, pathetic, ridiculous, blatant and consistently effective on a certain type of woman. So I can't fault you for being accurate, at that.

The thing is, the whole story lands! Mia has a tiny core of integrity to her the whole time, but it's been twisted so hard by Jean-Luc that she makes herself the villain all the while being a victim. The one guy said this story twisted him and he was ashamed, but I truly think that everybody gets what they deserve here-Mia gets NOTHING! She LOSES! Carl gets free, the bastards die and the baby gets a mother who will worship her as a second chance and love her more than either other potential parent would. This isn't a conventional happily ever ending, but it feels like everybody's gonna be fine after this. It's a good story in the end, and I'm glad I never have to read it again. Now, I need a shower...

on the strength of the writing alone

Carl pondered her.

The boy walked along the edge of the rain swollen creek, carefully avoiding slipping into the quickly rushing water. A smattering of rain fell, but the water, accumulating in the gullies and ravines of the surroundeding hills still slowly rose. The faint, high pitched plea nearly unheard over the roar of the water halted the boy. It took a few seconds to find its source. A small, black scorpion clung precariously to a nearly submerged rock perhaps six or eight inches from the bank. Six or eight inches might as well be a thousand miles for such a tiny and helpless creature. The scorpion carried on her back a dozen or more of terrified babies. Seeing the boy stop, she cried out, "Save me and my babies young sir." The mother's cry broke through the boy's surprise. He reached out his hand . . .

The old woman found the viper half frozen on her doorstep. Overwhelmed with compassion, she brought it into her cottage, tucked the snake into the bosom of her dress and sat before the warm fire. Slowly dozing, and filled with self-congratulatory thoughts of her goodness and mercy, the old woman bolted upright, struck with the pain of the viper's venom entering her breast. As she died, she cried out, "Why did you bite me? I saved you and you have killed me." The viper answered smuggly, "You knew what I was when you found me. I am a viper and it is my nature to bite, to kill, and to destroy."

The young boy pulled back his hand from the scorpion and her babies. With only a seconds thought, he picked up a rock and brought it down on the scorpion and her poisonous brood. The crushed remains of her black body slipped off the rock into the rushing water. A moment's contemplation served to calm the boy as he considered his narrow escape from death. He shuddered to think of his mother's grief at finding his body, dead from the sting of the vile scorpion and her poisonous brood. Suddenly, in joy at his delivererance, he struck up a jaunty whistle, turning to home and the fresh baked pie he knew awaited him there.

Mia stood and rubbed her belly, content in her knowledge that regardless of Carl's decision, she would raise her unborn son to be just like her. The blow of Carl's foot crushing into her belly shot unimaginable pain through her. He stood and watched the life slowly leave her eyes, the contempt she had for her parents died. Her debassed sense self-righteousness, her hatred and venom died with her. He had taken her into his bosom, into his home, not seeing her for the viper she was. He knew what she was now. No longer could she fool him. No longer would he bring this sick, venomous thing into his house. Like the boy at the stream, the cry of a mother did not fool him. He crushed her.

As Mia breath stopped, the air became cleaner, the sun shone brighter, the world became slightly safer for all other mothers and their children. Never again would another man take this snake, this scorpion, into his home Her unborn son would never be taught by his unholy mother to rape or kill for his pleasure. Carl learned the lesson of the scorpion and the viper taught to him by his father. Now it was time for his father and brother to learn their lesson. Carl turned and left the house free, with a lightness to his steps.

The places you go! Your imagination is priceless.

I pray to all the deities and flying spaghetti monsters this is imaginary.

You are the best.

This was a truly well-written story with multiple surprises. Given the fact that most of the protagonists were liars, I am still unsure what was fact. But, the unknowns fit well, as there may not be any real truth.

However, the story was overly complex for me. There were too many variables that had to break exactly right for the story to continue. Life is not like that, and maybe that is why I am not a fan of the Mission Impossible stories. But, it is the author's perogative, and the story was well done.

I do feel sorry for Mia's child. Mia had not been taking care of herself, and that will affect the fetus, ancd it is unclear that Mia could break from her psychological disorders to become a good mother. Mia may simply be giving birth to a true monster, even if he survives to birth.

Your ending was better! 4****

I am furious that this story was placed in the Loving Wives category!

It should have been in Mind Control or BDSM. I am not a fan of either of those categories and avoid them.

I feel betrayed by the author and am disappointed with the sham. I have scored the story accordingly for the waste of my time.

Do u get your rocks off by writing these sado sick stories....I pity your family

I only gave it a 4 because of the superfluous rambling about the art world, that wasn't really necessary.

The change in attitude for the wife was not expected, but nicely done. The fact that what she went through actually happens, should be the real shocker, but please note, that it's not.

Why the author decided not to answer her question, is not without reason, I'm sure.

One last item, if you please. If your going to use a foreign language, put it's meaning after in quotation marks. I wasn't about to go through the mechanics of researching the art world, and take a course in French just to understand a short story.

A worthy read, and thanks for the effort.

It changed so much it boggled the mind trying to create highs and lows spoilt the story because of to much things involved with no real explanation to much jumping around.

sorry 1* only from me.

And loving wives are really very similar I suppose, maybe this story more than others. It also presented me with a pretty good mystery, that kept me reading. I have to say I was entertained, and that’s really all I want in a story. Thank you.

Carl should just toss her and her demon spawn into a wood chipper.

-1000 from me. Artistic crap and waaaayyy beyond anything I ever want to read in this forum. As for inclusion in 'loving wives' genre - no way - more like gothic horror - I quit reading after the fourth page.

A Master piece. Great work as always, interesting insight. Wonderful ending.