Three Sisters Ch. 01

I don't where this story was supposed to be going or what story it was to impart other than an intense dislike by two people. What was the point?

I took you advice and read VertigoJ's Party of Five first. I must admit I found his version amusing and now reading your first installment a very good American version of his Australian story keep it up so far so good man

Hey Right,

I think is mentioned in Chapter 1 that Jacquie was 27. I could be mistaken. The first chapter wasn't meant to give you full biographies of each character. In any case, if the story was "complete" we wouldn't need Chapter 2 or any after that! you sound like a guy that wants it all now! Patience, my friend. Hopefully you enjoy Chapters 2-3 which are both posted,

We know the names, that Josh is 18 and has 3 sisters. We know which one is oldest but have no other reference material. Their ages? What they do, and why? other than the dislike of Dawn, how about the others?

sorry, but this is about as incomplete as another story I read recently that started with chapter 02 and assumed we all knew what happened in a chapter that was no longer on Lit.

who are these people and why should we care?

Should be submitted shortly.

First I think the chapters need to be longer than just two pages otherwise you leave out a lot of the story. The second thing I wanted to say is that I am interested on how things develop. Third you did hit most of the parts that counted in the original with a surpris twist with the mother being dead and Josh having that girl has a girlfriend. We all know things can not be the same as the original. I look forward to seeing what you think of doing next time. Hope you continue goodbye.

Party of Five is and has always been one of my favorite series. Halfway through reading your first chapter I found myself grinning as I enjoyed the characters. It feels like you hit all their personalities perfectly. I'm now eagerly awaiting the next chapter.

However, I do agree with another poster in that they should be a bit longer. I wish you the best of luck with this series and hope you can make it a long and good one.

I will keep an eye on this. I have a feeling this guy is going to push things to lose their virginities and he will wind up getting dumped.

I'm really looking forward to where you'll take the characters. Curious to how Josh will start banging his sisters.

I've read both Party of Five and JTSOU, so I hope you actually finish this story and don't drop it halfway through like Vertigo did, that being said, I think you made a mistake making the first chapter this short, unless you're capable of delivering a chapter every two or three days, I think you should make them 3-4 literotica pages long and publish them on weekly basis, otherwise you'll end up with way too many chapters where nothing ever happens.

My other complain would be on the main character, that's what put me off from vertigo's story at first as well, never been a fan of introvert/whiny/crybaby type of characters, hard to feel anything but pity or disgust for that kind of people both in real life and literature, at least for me. Hopefully you make him a little less of a bitch, and more of a man. Still rated 5 stars, I hope you keep motivated to write, I'll be waiting for future deliveries.

Right. So First I have high hopes for this thanks to your mentioning of Mental and his work. That I enjoy and also have much hope for. That said the more people, or characters that are in a story the more the quality seems to drop off. Gladly it seems that Mental is doing well with his six or seven characters. I haven't read the "original" so I might do that. There's nothing wrong with practice, and the most conceivable ways I can imagine practicing writing is by copying an idea and shifting is structure or focus, and of course reading. I wish you luck!

Good start. I too immensely enjoyed the original stories that this is based off of. Do I think that it should be rebooted? Honestly no. Does that mean I won't give you the chance to change my opinion? Nope. I can already see small changes to the characters which seem to signal the intent to make this your own. I intend to withhold final judgment and allow you to lead me through your story. There is always a chance that you may be on Par with the master or better. In the end there is nothing new under the sun, lets just hope yours earns its own place in that sun. Good luck.

I like what you have done so far. I also have no issues with the names remaining the same. Unlike one complainer I do not see Mentalcase's story as an adaptation of "Party of Five". His story is totally different with ONLY the brother-sister incest truly in common. Everything else in his story is different. You did a nice job of paying homage to the original story by keeping the names and basic personality traits of the characters, although Josh is supposed to be reader and brainiac like Alice if you remember the scene in the original story where they are watching Jeopardy and he keeps beating Alice to the punch on the answers.

I also like the difference of Valerie as his gf in this version of the story instead of the one he keeps pining after from afar. It works with the change of Josh not being as smart as in the original story. The thing I appreciate most is you clearly acknowledge the original authors work and are not claiming the characters as your own. I look forward to what other changes you will make and what new territory you will take the story into when you reach the point where the original author left his story unfinished for some unexplained reason.

I have contacted the original author several times over the years. He stopped responding many years ago. I have attempted to contact him about redoing this story too, for whatever that is worth.

As a side note, I didn't change the names because I figured, why bother? This is a remake of his story, changing the names doesn't make it original at all. Only where I take it could. Clearly I'm not meaning to copy the story totally, but give me a few chapters before you question if I've changed enough. Honestly, I'm not looking to reinvent his wheel. A lot of the plan is to get it to where he got it too with some minor differences. I do believe though half the fun is in the getting there. Had he finished his story, I wouldn't be doing this at all.

First time author here, so I'm guessing there will be some growing pains. That's okay, I'm doing this for fun :)

Thank you for the feedback.

Great remake man I'm loving where this story is going and is looking forward too seeing what happens next. Anonymous be trolling brash don't worry. I beg of you too continue lol