Ultimate Nightmare

Marc continued, "I don't want to look because no matter what, I could never face Constance again. Plus I love my daughter and have too much respect for you."

Jason nodded as Marc finished, but looking confused stated, "Don't worry about me Marc. How you deal with Constance is your business. You do what you have to."

A little befuddled, Marc replied, "I have been terribly concerned about Constance's reaction when she finds out what I know. But I've been waiting to spring it on her until I found out what you plan to do about Addie."

Bewildered, Jason said, "It's more a question of how Addie wants to proceed than what I want. I love her, I'll do whatever she thinks is best."

Marc replied, "I am surprised at your attitude, although I can't disagree, after all, she is my daughter… my baby… my little girl, and always will be, in spite of what she's done."

"Sorry Marc, but I have no idea what Addie may have done to upset you." As Jason picked up his package, he shook it for emphasis. "I only know what Constance and Kenneth Undall have been doing."

Both men sat staring at each other briefly, their faces both masks of confusion. Marc went pale with understanding first. He backed away from Jason's envelope like it was a poisonous viper. His voice became a strangled gasp, stammering, "Noooo… not Constance… I'm talking about Addie and her lover… that Country Western singer… Bart Greenwald. What are you talking about… what are you saying… what is this about Kenneth Undall and my wife?"

Jason was confused, "What are you talking about Marc? It's not Addie that's having an affair, its Constance…" The look of sorrow and pain on Marc's face forced Jason to grasp the unthinkable. As Jason's hand lost its strength, the package dropped, landing with a plop on the edge of Marc's desk.

With a sad face, Marc reached into a desk drawer and pulled out a package similar to Jason's, complete with identical name stamp.

In a desolate voice, he said, "By the way Jason, like you, I've only read certain portions of the transcript. Since she's my daughter, I couldn't bring myself to look at the rest…. TMI is what I believe you kids call it."

Pain more tangible than any his body had ever endured coursed through Jason. "Addie… my Addie… is fucking around.… But we are supposed to be getting married," Jason said as he stood and stumbled backwards while shaking his head in denial.

As tears began to fall, Jason almost tripped twice, staggering blindly towards the direction of the downstairs bathroom. Although he made it in time, his stomach didn't feel any better afterwards.

In spite of still being light headed, when the room finally quit spinning Jason stood. After splashing some cold water on his face and rinsing out his mouth, he reluctantly made his way back to Marc's office. Jason found Marc just as he had left him, still sitting in his chair. Marc's eyes had a strange wounded look as his appearance seemed to have aged years in just the last few minutes.

"How long has this been going on?" Jason asked while sitting back down. When he looked up he could see that Marc was lost in the shock of his own thoughts and pain. "Damn it Marc, how long has she been fuck… cheating behind my back?" Jason demanded to know.

"I overheard the phone conversation three months ago," Marc

Overriding feelings of desolation, Marc looked up at Jason and demanded, "How long has Constance been cheating on my ass?"

Jason shrugged, "I first saw them together about three weeks ago, but they appeared to be very familiar with one another. So… your guess is as good as mine."

Marc pushed the package across the desk to Jason and said, "Son I don't care what you do with it, but it's yours now. I'm just sorry that this has happened… to both of us."

Picking up the envelope, it felt a thousand times heavier to Jason than the one he carried in earlier and had just slid across the desk to Addie's father. "Marc, I felt there were a few things in the transcript you really needed to see. I made sure they were highlighted."

Since he didn't respond, Jason wasn't sure whether Marc heard him. A few moments later Jason stood, ready to leave, when he heard Marc say, "Sorry Jason, but you have some nasty surprises in your package too."

"Good-bye Marc," Jason answered.

"Good-bye Jason… if you don't mind, I'll let you see yourself to the door." Marc almost whispered.

As he drove away from the Racine manor, Jason said to himself, "I was correct, I'm completely and royally fucked…. Why Addie… in God's name… why?" Then in a flash of anger, he suddenly realized, 'I bet Addie's with her lover right now.'

**********

Tightly gripping the steering wheel and staring straight ahead, Jason's mind was going even faster than his car as it sped through town, headed home. In a burst of reality, Jason was startled out of his zombie like state by the sound of a blaring car horn. Without thinking, Jason had run a red light, just barely missing another driver.

Quickly pulling to the side of the road, his heart beat wildly as he cursed himself under his breath. "Shit you stupid moron, get your head out of your ass or you'll end up getting killed." Jason took a moment to get his bearings and began to slowly calm down.

Still a few miles from home, he remembered a parking lot just down the road that butted up to a dance club Addie had brought him to on occasion. A few minutes later Jason parked his car in an isolated corner of that same parking lot as he tried to unwind.

In spite of his pain, Jason found himself unable to resist and began glancing through the transcript. Even though a bottle of water was helping quench his thirst, it was unable to flush the bile taste left by the reading material.

Tears rolled down his face as the reality expressed on the pages began to sink in. The four times Addie and her lover had been caught together were so vividly described, it caused his grief to grow and spread like cancer.

Jason could just hear Addie's lust filled comments as her voice rang in his ears as he read. "Yes Bart… yes deeper, I want it all…. Fuck me lover, fuck me till I can't walk." Every word she had used to encourage her lover, Jason had personally heard hundreds of times before. Each one now pierced his heart like an arrow.

Reeling in misery, Jason lost track of time and looked up in shock to find the parking lot had filled up. A group of people were amassed at the front door of the club waiting to get in.

The music from the club brought to mind the last time he and Addie had been here. Jason could still seeThis is so erotic.'

In the back of his mind Jason knew that getting home was tantamount to being able to relax and take the time to think things through. So after shaking free from his nostalgic interlude, he began rapidly flipping through the remaining pages. Suddenly, like a moth to a flame, his eyes were irresistibly drawn to a highlighted section of conversation.

"Damn it Addie… after this weekend I'm going to feel very slighted. In spite of how much I want, the only other time I get before your wedding is when you go to the spa."

"Believe me Bart, that isn't going to be our last time. After my honeymoon, you and I are going to find ways to get together a lot more. You're too damn hot and after this weekend Baby, there's no possible way I'm going to give you up. So don't worry, for a long time to come you'll be getting more of me than you can handle. Trust me… I've got everything under control, it will all work out."

"Baby I do trust you and I can't give you up either. Addie you're not only the sexiest, but also the most adventurous little hottie I've ever met. Now get up on your hands and knees lover, we're going make some puppies."

(giggling and laughter) "Ohh Bart… ohh yeah… put it inside me… now." (moaning) "Yyyeeeaaahhhhh baby, that's perfect."

The words began to blur as Jason's eyes filled with tears just before they trickled down his face. With heart pounding in his ears, Jason's breath became tortured gasps. As he stared unseeing at the cars parked around him, the transcript slid from his grasp.

His world shifted as Jason's life with Addie crumbled under the weight of his pain and loss. The picture perfect life he lived up to this moment was crumbling all around him, like a sand castle being systematically ravished by decimating waves.

"Why Addie, why?" Jason repeatedly asked while rocking back and forth, slamming into the headrest.

Jason didn't know how long he had been staring into space when he noticed a movement near the club. Looking up, his eyes narrowed. The churning pain in his gut suddenly turned into a searing anger.

Two of Addie's very close friends, Tonya and Emily, were walking unsteadily from the club towards the parking lot. It just so happens, that they were the very same two who were supposed to be with Addie at that very moment.

Not realizing Tonya had parked just a couple of rows over, Jason watched in surprise as they approached. For a few brief seconds he was unsure what to do while wondering, 'Is Addie with them and still in the club?'

After a night of dancing, the girls were arm in arm without a care in the world. Reaching Tonya's car, the two young ladies relaxed by leaning on the hood. As they joked and laughed when Emily motioned towards the club, neither noticed Jason get out of his car. Obviously hearing footsteps on the gravel as he stormed towards them, both turned to face Jason just before he got there.

Caught by surprise, their eyes went wide with shock as Emily in an alcohol slurred voice said, "Jason. You're s'posed to be with Mr. Raacinee. Whhatt…?"

Tonya suddenly snapped, "Can it, Em," which caused Emily to quickly cower as Tonya asked, "What can we do for you Jason?" Her tone was barely polite.

Jason stopped a few feet from Tonya, who he had never been very chummy with. Their relationship over the years would best be described as mutual toleration. But under the current circumstances, he could give a rat's ass who she is or what she thinks.

Staring at the two girls, Jason's smoldering eyes finally locked on Tonya. "You seem to be missing somebody. Nightlife at the spa must have been pretty dull to spend four hours driving back here just to dance." Jason retorted with a snarl.

Emily's eyes grew larger as she blurted out, "Oh gooshh Tonya… he knoooss…. I'm goinnna beee sick."

Shaking in open disgust, Jason fought to keep under control. As his hands clinched into fist, he spouted through curling lips, "Knowssssss…!!! Why ever would you think I know anything Emily? Oh, you must be referring to my precious Addie and Bart Greenwald?

"Em, get in the car," Tonya ordered before turning to face Jason. Looking him straight in the eye, she said, "I told Addie flat out that I would not, I repeat not, lie for her. As you can see, she isn't here with us. So draw your own conclusions, but don't ask me any more questions, then I won't have to lie." Emily stumbled into the car as Jason backed up so Tonya could do the same.

Still seething Jason turned to go when Tonya unexpectantly rolled down her window and said, "Jason, I'm sorry and Emily is too. But Addie didn't go looking for this, it just happened. She never started out to do this on purpose…, but it just got out of control. I know it doesn't make sense but she really does love you."

He waited for a few moments then his shoulders dropped as he looked back. They knew his original rage had subsided when in a very tired voice, he replied, "I appreciate your candor, but it doesn't change a damn thing."

Just as Tonya revved her engine, Jason caught a brief glimpse of Emily dialing her cell phone before they peeled out headed for the exit. He could guess who she was calling.

Suddenly feeling decades older than his twenty-seven years, Jason walked slowly back to his car. After getting in and starting it up, he pulled out into traffic and headed home.

While pulling up to his house, Tonya's parting words came drifting back. 'Addie didn't go looking for this… it just happened… but got out of control.'

"Was that supposed to make me feel better?" He wondered out loud. "Whether it happened on purpose or not, she let this Bart guy have her and repeatedly went back for more."

Suddenly remembering the transcript, he angrily railed, "On top of that, Addie then tells him they will get together after she's married."

After turning off the ignition, Jason stormed into the house. The first thing he did was double lock all the entrances and flip off the garage door opener. "No way is Addie getting her little ass into this house again without going through me first," he viciously proclaimed. After checking his phones, Jason didn't know why, but felt relieved that there were no messages on either yet.

"Well one thing's for sure, now Addie can not only do whatever she wants, but also whenever. Because as of this moment, she no longer has a fiancé, at least not one named Jason," he tearfully snarled.

Crawling into bed, Jason lay there languishing in his own anguish, "Why Addie? For god's sake… why?" He curled into a ball, just wanting the mind numbing pain to stop. The feeling of aching emptiness was throwing his raw emotions into a caldron of sheer agonizing turmoil as they vacillated wildly between rage, pain, fear and hopelessness.

Jason checked his cell phone one more time, seeing there were still no messages, he snapped it shut in frustration. Certain she was with her lover Jason angrily spat, "Well it is difficult to talk with someone's cock in your mouth."

**********

Addie came speeding down the street. She had been in a panic all the way home. Unintentionally Addie accidentally braked her car into a sideways skid, coming to a stop in front of Jason's house.

Her normally flawless makeup was a disaster from crying, but matched her red swollen eyes. It was one of the rare times that looks didn't matter to Addie, her only concern was getting to Jason. She tried to push her key into the lock several times without success. In growing frustration, Addie sobbed, "Dear God… please let him be here," then pleaded, "Jason… please," as her open palm pounded in panic against a deaf door.

Turning to push the doorbell she noticed her name in big red letters on an envelope tacked to the wood framing. In spite of her sudden desire to be somewhere else, her trembling hand slowly reached out and with steady pressure gingerly pulled it loose. Addie paused for a moment to fight off her growing spasms of nausea and fear. Finally she opened it and began to read.

Addie,

Don't try your key, the locks have been changed. Forget the doorbell I've already left. I will be at your parent's house later this afternoon if you want to talk.

Jason

After reading it several times, she stared at the door of what previously was going to be her future home. Sadly she firmly suspected that it would probably never be part of her life again. Noticing that the curtains were open, Addie looked into a couple of the windows to make sure Jason wasn't home. The warmth from the good memories as she looked inside caused her to fall to her knees, sobbing.

As Addie unsteadily made her way back to her car, she kept looking over her shoulder at the door. Praying and pleading for Jason to open it and make everything alright.

Her body, wracked with convulsive sobs, Addie collapsed over the steering wheel wondering in grief, 'What have I done…? I've lost my heart and soul.' In shock, she sat for a long time just staring at Jason's house before finally starting her car and slowly driving away.

**********

At the very moment Addie was reading Jason's note, he was sitting in a restaurant across town, his face drawn and etched with sorrow. Unable to taste a thing, Jason was forcing himself to eat as he mechanically picked at his food.

Jason's emotional whirlwind of the last few days had left him completely drained and he sat lost in thought, staring out the window. Even though it was a late spring day filled with bright sunshine, it felt bleak and cold to him.

Although Addie's affair had fractured their relationship, its final desecration was her desire to be with her lover after the honeymoon.

Knowing in his heart what had to be done didn't make Jason's pain any less intense. For the first time in his life, he knew what people meant when they said, "I just want to die and get it over with."

The experiences of life told him that 'time' would work miracles, albeit slowly. All Jason could do now was wait patiently in the wake of time's relentless march. Praying that when his new life arrived, the old one, along with its pain, would be completely gone.

Glancing up at the clock, he listlessly grumbled, "Hmmmmpp! one fifteen… damn, only five minutes later than the last time I looked."

**********

Jason received his first surprise after arriving at the Racine manor, when the door opened before he could even ring the bell.

"Tonya…!" Jason said, as he addressed his second surprise.

The young woman standing in front of him nodded slightly as she bowed her head. Tonya's eyes refused to meet his as she informed him, "With her folks in an uproar along with everything else, Addie needs all the support she can get, that's the reason I'm here. Addie's in the garden, she's been waiting for you…. Nobody will bother the two of you there."

While heading for the back door, Jason heard his future ex-father-in-law's angry voice blaring through the hallways. 'Marc has too much energy,' Jason thought as he realized, 'I'm too damn tired to get that worked up.'

Jason found Addie standing on a grassy knoll overlooking the lake behind the manor. Even from a distance he could tell she was crying and for a brief moment felt a tremendous urge to try and comfort her…. Then remembering Addie's actions had all been of her own choosing, Jason paused and thought, 'Having to pay the piper really sucks.'

Taking a hard look, he couldn't help noticing her hair and dress were a disaster. For some reason, the fact she was hurting didn't make Jason feel the least bit better, even though the thought crossed his mind that it should have.

When just a few feet away, he stopped and said, "Addie I'm here…, but I don't know for how long. So if you've got something to say, make it quick."

She visibly stiffened at the tone of his voice, but between her fear and shame she couldn't turn around. "Jason! I'm so sorry, I…," her voice suddenly faltered and her shoulders slumped as Addie's sobbing face fell forward into her open palms.

Seeing her like this was putting him through an emotional wringer. Even though Jason still loved her deeply, Addie's betrayal had destroyed the pillars of that love. In a strained voice heavy with irritation, he asked, "Will you please face me?"

She shook her head and replied, "I can't… I'm pretty sure what I did was beyond anything either of us would have ever dreamed I was capable of doing. Just knowing that my stupid, foolish actions have destroyed what we had together makes it too difficult for me."

Addie sobbed, "It may be more of my selfish behavior, but I love you too much. I would do anything if I could make this up to you…, but through our love, I have come to know you too well. From the pain in your voice, I can tell that your heart, big as it is, has been crushed.