All Comments on 'What Do You Want?'

Giving his weight in pounds?

I thought only those Americans did that! (I'm a Brit)

a lot of wrong words and the intro was to damn long. delete and have a GOOD EDITOR rewrite it for you, you should never post a story with out using a GOOD EDITOR you really need one your writing and word usage sucks. this is a case of a writer that has good ideas but can't write worth a damn.

I put weights in pounds otherwise Americans, who I understand make up the vast percentage of readers, would complain. And yes, I'm a born and bred Brit too. Can't win, can I?

And to the other anonymous person who obviously is something of an expert.....who says I've used wrong words?

Am I not permitted to express myself in words that make perfect sense to most people, if not to you?

As for using an editor - if I were paid to write then yes, an editor would be essential - but I've seen what a damn mess they can make too!

"Can't write worth a damn....." you say. Oh yes - how come that 20 of my stories are rated HOT then?

Quite honestly, I think I'd rather read my versions than yours!

So thank you for nothing...not that you'll ever bother to come here again, will you?

And to the idiot who demanded you get an editor and rewrite/delete/go jump in the river, get knotted you fuckwit, this was well written. I think another, less able writer is feeling a little threatened and butt-hurt round about now, as my American girlfriend so succinctly puts it, so job done, mate! And to the Brit commentator, the vast majority of Americans who make up the readership of this site have no idea what a kilogram or a centimetre is (to be honest, most Brits 'over a certain age' don't either; I still think in inches, yards, stones and tons, not the incomprehensible metric system dreamed up by those cheese-eating surrender-monkeys across the channel and imposed on us by Brussels... ) so if the author wants to make life easier for his readers, let him; I think there are better things about this story to mention than a device for making it more readable. If you need to make a point, put down your British-Bulldog flag, yank your Union Jack underpants out of the crack of your arse, and make a trenchant, relevant, and on-point comment, for goodness sake!

So what if you are a Brit- you have a knack for writing; your description is

great, you write as if you want persons reading to see where, what, who

and how to be answered. You did that along with keeping interest of the

reader. When you write it WILL NOT please every reader; most of the

comments you can take or leave. Not all people who read write a story

to be read but they have opinion-remember what opinions can be! I

personally enjoyed reading your story-thank you!!!

I cannot understand the critics who are trashing this story. Compared to most stories posted on this site this one is clearly a 5, but understand that every time you reply to a troll you will get trolled again. They're just like that.

It is obvious that there are pathetic trolls who only read "New" stories and who then immediately leave rubbish feedback and scores, because I've noticed that whenever I post a story, within hours it will get a low score. Also within a short time some junk comments get posted too.

And then, as the days pass and the story enters the main gathering, the score will rise and rise.....eventually reaching its real value and any comments that are added will also reflect the star rating.

Also, as had been commented, to pick on my stories is weird because there really are some terribly written stories, so badly written that they would never pass the editor of a quality-controlled journal.

Oh well - we're all entitled to our opinions!

i notice the same thing Chris... i assume it's from authors on the site who want to improve their scores by dragging down others... they target some new stories and give them low scores... you'll also notice that some stories instantly get super high scores and i just don't believe those scores reflect real popularity most of the time... of course it sounds like sour grapes and it's hard to prove but you could rig scores quite easily with 20 or 30 friends (or computer accounts) to score your story a 5 and give all the other new content 1 or 0... btw i gave you a 5 on this... good story with realistic characters...

Unfortunately you can't please all your readers BUT that cames with being a writer. I myself loved it, thank you. 5 stars from me.....

and well thought out. Well written and descriptive. I could picture the two of them as I read through the story. Look forward to reading more. I agree with the other comments about some people just making poor comments and posting low scores. I read them for enjoyment and entertainment.

"Pictures of Lily"

- The Who

1967, not 1987. Moon and Entwistle are turning in their graves...

ignore the geocentric snobs who can't recognise anything beyond their own neighbourhood. Lbs. vs Stones? You usual provide both, i.e. 12 stone 3, = 171, about 12 stone or about 170, etc. I have to laugh each time someone becomes critical of any other way of using English than their own. They forget it didn't originate in the U.S., or Canada. or Australia, or South Africa, or . . . Even better, it is a good thing some measurements have been standardised, or we would all have to know the physical dimensions of the current monarch to know how long a foot or a yard was. lol.

This was a good story, I liked the background and subplot. It just seemed to go from distant, to for ever after, faster than your usual measured pace.

Great job friend liked the whole story good ending.Not trying to pick but I think instead of saying how much he weighs would be better to say medium build, your hight and weights describe someone pretty slim.(Great job anyway!)

A very enjoyable story