by wild175133
The makings of a great story, although a bit too quick.
Slow down, break into some detail...
Get the wife involved...Build it. Normally it would be "slowly," but in your case SLOWWWWWWLY.
Ya laid some great foundation for a great story, even though it was "a run through the hedges."
Indulge...Think about it..
could have ended with the husband telling the wife what happened in the garage
The series of questions with all those pronouns got me confused... and subsequently uninterested after that.
That's it, there needs to be probably 3 more chapters. Perhaps even 5 more.