by tonyl65
I like the descriptive sec and bi-sex. Get an editor so that you clean up spelling and grammer
Loved the strory and the action. But, yes, get an editor. I'd be willing to help with that. Let me know.
Loving this story and its bisexual theme. Can't wait for next chapter!
You have definitely given us an interesting plot line. Unfortunately the misspellings detract in that they draw attention away from your story. It is very hard to edit what you have just written. Try one of the volunteer editors. But please keep writing. You obviously have a talent.
I can't imagine what that day must have been like for Laura with soooooo many new and wonderful discoveries unfolding all at once - life certainly couldn't remain the same after this - loved it!!
took a sneak peak at the next chapter
Looks hot
I enjoyed this whole story. I liked that David and Tony were really into each other. Personally I would much rather have sex with a man than a woman. Your descriptions of the guys sucking and fucking each other was hot.