All Comments on 'With Laila'

Your story is so hot, on so many levals. The telling, the stopping, the continuing exposition of Laila's awaking, and Sali's own growing excitement.

Beautifully phrased, I'm looking forward to more of your stories, Salimak.

Rubbish bin it

What an excellent story. A real page turner. The characters are so well drawn, and the descriptions of the actions, bodies and internal dialogue are spot on. Well done! And thank you for sharing.

Absolutely amazing.

Five stars from me. The breathless excitement of youthful sexual exploration, perfectly captured in words.

Technically, there's one issue you need to address Salimak... you flitted between using and not using 'quotes' to denote dialogue. Personally, I like embedded (ie 'quoteless') dialogue, so that works fine for me. It's a strong European writing tradition, but few US writers, the great Cormac McCarthy apart, have embraced it; and I get the odd complaint about it from US commenters who can't cope with something he (it's always a guy) isn't used to.

But that wee inconsistency didn't stop me awarding you five stars.

I've favourited you so I can find more stories, when you post them. As you really must, please. You're a glowing beacon in the sometimes mediocre swamp on Lit nowadays.

Wow. This is incredibly hot. Pushes all the right buttons.

Thanks for this story.

Another beautifully written achingly hot tantalizing story! Thank You, Salima!

Salima,

You have a very sexy mind, and you put it into words so well. Terrific, erotic stuff. xxx

A superb script. This would have taken considerable thought before penning each page. The entire lifestyle needs expanding in another chapter.

Absolutely riveting and erotic story. One of the best I have ever read!