by PacoFear
Wow. Congratulations are in order as you've officially rendered me speechless! Of course now I have to read the rest of your work!
That was easily the greatest erotic... no, I'm not saying this right. Incest isn't generally my thing, but I drop in from time to time, but my god, that was beautiful... that's the word I was after. Beautiful. Thank you.
Hot! Erotic! An actual love story between siblings. It wasn't a "smut" story at all. I didn't get the IMU until the end either. Typical guy. Very good read. Sequel?
I usually avoid long stories. 6 pages is over my limit. I got so interested that I "broke" my rule. About half way into the stories I thought Chip was either non-existent or the wedding would be cancelled. I even thought she might have been a virgin and Scooter was going to be her first.
Like the others I never figured out the "IMU". It was a nice twist.
Well written.
the first time it came up took me a second ut I'm the type that if something doesn't make sense to me I have to figure it out so take that how ever but a great story definitely one of the best stories I've read on here especially considering I have just 2 hr before I have to be at work with no sleep lol
The first time I read imu I didn't get it it wasnt till the third time that I figured it ment that awesome story one of the best I have read keep them coming
Creative, erotic, awesome! Makes me wish I had a sister to be my Lizzie! Thank you very much!
i read manga so i got it almost immediatelly
you could re do this as a serious romance (nothing wrong with it just make it like a full novel) it would work in a manga
have you read please twins?
Great story loved every bit of it. Even with an overactive imagination i never got the imu untill the end. Very well written with a good catch to it.
ha, awesome story!
Thought it was I'm Marrying U, but the heart works out better.
Oh, and it's padawan =P
its was soo funny at the beginning that i totally forgot this was a sex story
I have read this story 3 times now and it never gets old... I read a lot of stories on here and this is the best one on here by far!
i thought it was i miss you. cause it was every morning when she was like 10 i think you said, so might have been a bad dream or something when she was that old and just kept up the game to annoy Scooter.
There's always something about the forbidden. That line that should never be crossed, but you find yourself with your toes right on it. Teetering. Where your heart pounds, and your breath catches. Knowing, that at -any- moment, you could tumble over to the other side.
I loved this story. I love that it was a long one. I think that it needed the slow pace from the moment Lizzie decided to actively chase her brother, to the point in time where she decided to start seducing him.
im-this story.
You had me, I guess I just wasn't girl enough to figure that out....loved your story!
i got imu and that chip wasn't real early in the story and i'm a guy(not gay) so it's not just girls that are smart lol
I'm sorry for anyone who is offended by this comment, but I do know for a fact it doesn't take nearly as long as you think to seduce a sibling. You see, I too have a story similar to this, but less teasing and more free speaking was involved between my sister and I. The entire seduction took nearly a month, and we are still at it to this day.
It did take a lot of patients to read this story but luckily I'm a patient guy. I didn't get "I m u" until she said it. I thought it was "I made u..." or I'm yours" (in this case spelled "urs")
A great read. A little slow at first, but well worth the wait - a very satisfying and envious ending.
Im a woman and i did get the imu thing but only after writing it on my skin
Great read!!!!!!
This is awesome... Perhaps you could top it off with an audiobook production, that would be truly astounding... just. just WOW...
-- MasterDevils --
A joyful piece of fiction - well crafted, well paced, and masterfully done. I could compliment you in detail, but let's just say well done and leave it at that.
Regards,
John Thomas (believe it or not)
I favorited your story "Stolen Kisses" because it's so beautifully written and the characters are so real and likable and the story is so damn erotic, and this is just like it, another truly wonderful story. You've a great gift with painting a believable history and the bond between your characters in just a few short pages. Love it! ^.^
really? your friends couldn't figure it out? i got it the first time i saw it and thought, how is Scooter not getting it, through the whole story. cute concept on that part. loved the story.
I've been reading.g stories on there for almost a year and that is by far the best yet
I knew what IMU was when I first read it only because my girlfriend and I did that exact same thing to each other! This was easily the best story I've read on here. Well done, I m'd it :)
Works I have ever read. You are a gifted writer and should keep it up. You don't seem to be an armature and could definenty write professionally if you don't already.
I was enthralled from part 1. I kinda guessed she had made up Chip from the beginning, but it was fantastically paced, and a amazing story. Really well done. :D
This is a story, sweet and so well written! One of the best on Literotica.
Great story ! Loved the little butt thing.. Have always had a thing for tight butts on slender girls, you created a nice vision in my mind.
Awesome, only word that describes your story. I have written and proofed many stories, and read hundreds on here, this is one of the very best. congrats, and keep writing
Didn't get the imu thing until she started drawing it in the sand. I guessed that Chip was a lie from the start though and confirmed it when Richie thought that Chip wasn't performing enough of his manly duties.
One of the best short stories, of any kind, I've ever read. The line you tread between sweet, endearing, quirky and sexy is artfully negotiated. I loved it.
I got the imu from the start;) loved the story! Please keep writing! I need more. This story was the perfect blend of love and hot taboo sex. Thank you.
Loved it. This is the first comment I ever left. You earned it.
This is an amazing story. I look forward to reading all your other work.
I was thinking something along the lines of "I masterbate you" or something!
I figured it out about half way through. And, I'm a 24 y.o. guy, just for reference.
No siblings that I desire but I have a few cousins I'd like to have at it.
you pissed me off at the begining with that chip bulls*** but I love the ending and the relationship in this story, it was a beautiful conclusion and very creative I hope you continue writing such wonderful stories
The first time I saw IMU written, I knew what she was trying to say...of course I'm a girl and have done similar ways of telling someone I love them. Love the story, have no siblings that I pine after (doesn't mean I don't have siblings, just not attracted to them) however have always dreamed of having a sister/stepsister/half-sister to seduce.
I've been off this site for quite a while. Came back on tonight, and found this absolute gem of a story. It's so well written, and I feel like I KNOW these characters. And, I guessed at imu about halfway through, maybe a bit after, though I figured it was a riddle, where she replaced the "L" for love with the next letter over, not that it was a heart.
Also, this is my first story comment, and only left it because this was so good, and you deserved to know.
perhaps the best incest story I've ever read, you are a master craftsman at writing!
I rarely give a 5 star rating, but this story is definitely one of my favorites. I've been going through the highest rated stories on Lit, and I just saw one that was written like a Goosebumps Choose Your Own Adventure novel, I can't understand how that deserves a 5.00 and this only gets a 4.85. Despite your scores, you certainly deserve better!
Great story! Enjoyed it a lot. Not just the sexy stuff but everything in between,very well written. Keep it up Pacofear and would like to see a sequel some day. Lizzie and Scooter were so likable I want to know what became of them and their relationship and if Mom ever found out about their sexcapades and if she did, did she join in? Oh, being a guy it took me up until the morning after the "deck scene" to figure out "imu" but at least I got it before the end, my bff got it right of the bat, and wouldn't tell me. It turns out she has been "imu"-ing me for the past 23 years and now I have a new girlfriend. What can I say, I'm a little slow! Talk about patience though. Thank you Pacofear. Shawn K
Great story, I absolutely loved it. It didn't take me long to figure out what "imu" actually was, and I am a male reader. The pacing was amazing. I think the length was just spot on. The set up, the deliver, absolutely awesome. Everything about this story was great, except that it ended. Cheers!
The whole concept, the timing, the length, the wording, the feelings... all of it was absolutely brilliantly worked. I will admit, I am female and did not figure out the "imu" until the end. its perfect.
This is honestly the first story I've read that combined incest and an actual story. You have a real talent for writing and I hope that other writers will catch on. Truly amazing.
This is absolutely amazing. You truly have a gift for writing, and i hope there will be many more stories like this to come. I honestly almost cried at the ending, your story filled me with so many emotions i can't express. I can't convey how much i absolutely love this, never stop writing!
This was one of the best stories I have ever read...very well done
As my first story read on this site, this was amazing. I've always had a like for stories such as this, but this was amazing. It was so much more than I expected when I saw the name of this website browsing 4chan. Definitely going to be here for a long time.
I would have to say that this is by far my favorite story I've read so far. I too was hoping for more on these two, but understand why you don't wish to continue it. I did not figure out the "imu".....the best I came up with was, "I'll marry you".
I did figure out there was no chip though.
Thanks so much for a very well done story.
This has to be one of the most amazing stories I have read on here. The craftsmanship and style were phenomonal. Kudos to you, sir!!
Amazing story hard to believe no one figured out imu though I figured it out right off the bat your story is well written with lots of sexyal intrigue I loved it
this story took an extremely long time to get into. other than that keep up the good work
Amazing background, rising action, the entire plot for that matter was clearly well though out and carefully put together. I initially thought imu was something like I miss you, boy was I wrong! The relationship written here between the siblings was sexy yet retained its cute aspects, and the best relationships are the little cute ones like this one. My regards to the author!
This is the 3rd story of yours that I've read and I........ Am so in love with your writing style. It is so clear and precise. You are so unlike the other writers who just scribble off some mediocre drivel so horny readers can just get off. You craft your work so delicately. Reading your writing makes me wish I could meet you in real life and pick your brain. I can only express my feelings as awe. I am in awe of your talent as a storyteller.
Extremely well written. I love that it wasn't a slam bam, thnk you ma'am story.
This was exceptionally well written, kept my interest until the end... Which doesn't happen often.
On a side note, I figured out the 'imu' right away, though I am the type that figures out simple 'puzzles' like that very easily, and the context made it fairly obvious to me.
seriously. nice work
and FYI i totally knew the M was a heart the whole time
I don't think i realized it was supposed to be a mystery for the reader.
but nice work, perfect story
Loved this story the first of yours that I've read and would love to read some more so keep'em coming. Also love the part were Liz sways Rich to lay down with her that was an intimate scene and the part in the restroom was quiet funny. I never really figured out the "imu" until the end so I guess I'm a smart-stupid guy too ^_^.
This was the first stories i've read on here and must say I loved it. I brought alot of emotions. Ide love to know what happened after the beach and if they stayed together. Great story.
This was incredibly well done, and kept me gripped. It showed genuine emotion in my opinion.
Also i did get 'imu' near from the beginning, ironically me and my sister would do the exact same thing (minus the incest).
Keep up the good work
i sat here reading this whit my best friends sister siting not 5 foot from me ive had a crush on her for years but have all ways been scared to say any thing after reading this i finally asked her out she said yes said that shes been wondering for years if ide ever ask said she would have waited forever so paco thank you for a good story and every thing eles
Great story by the way, I don't even remember exactly where in the story but I suddenly realized what the imu was and felt super smart.
paco does it again a story with no end and plot holes big enough to drive a semi through. either finish the story or delete it and stop writing it isn't fair to the readers to leave a story in this condition.
I've never read a story that was so well, that it made me read the whole thing. Usually I leave about half way. But this really kept me going. I applaud you good sir. And thank you for the wonderful read.
I really liked this story. I appreciated that you warned us in the beginning it was long but I found that only added to drawing out the anticipation of the whole story. Good writing also.
All I can say is I really love this story! Thank you for writing.
Simply the best and most well thought out story iv ever read. U r truly a gifted person
Amazingly written! A wonderful tale that relates just how sneaky girls can be! lol
It didn't take me long at all to work out what "Imu" meant. I thought it was very sweet that Scooter couldn't work it out until the final page.
This is a wonderfully written piece and it was a pleasure to read. Keep on writing!
...reading this again.
I'm pretty sure that one of those whooping 800 comments has been writen by me. And now you get another one.
This time I knew in adcance that it would be a good read. But I enjoyed tha ride again even though I remembered a thing or three.
And isn't that a sign of great authors? Being re-readable?
For me it is! ;-D
Thanks! Again! A lot!
You are a great writer. All of your descriptions painted a picture perfectly. I figured out imu right when it was said because my little brother used to say that to me bc he couldn't say i love you. he said it out of brotherly love, he was around the age of 5. Your story made me cum multiple times, thank you.
Great authorship of a very tender yet erotic story. Head and shoulders above the vast majority of work here.
So sweet and so hot at the same time. This is what all other erotica should aspire to be.
Thanks for this wonderful story!
I figured out the "heart" about page 4, but I'm a graphic artist so I "see" things that others don't see (especially in my own work!). It was pretty much a lock when Richie thought that Chip wasn't fucking his sister often enough.
I found it very well written. I really like some of the more novel ides here; that she is actually an athlete as opposed to being athletic & the entire "words on skin" concept.
The only area where I think your writing falls down, and it's something you share with almost every writer here, is certain word choices(does anyone REALLY call a pussy "her sex"?) and the use of "superlative" characters. Why must the sister always be the most beautiful, or the brother have a 10" cock? For your story, would it have changed much if he was just rally smart and her very good athlete? Has anyone you know gone undefeated for 4 years?
Having said this, I think your writing i quiite a few steps above the norm here and I look forward to reading more of your work.
ciao - netgenf
It wasn't difficult to get thru the entire story, very intriguing. My pussy is soaked! Looking forward to more of your writings. Well done!
I loved this. The build up was not only hot, but believable and the imagery was gorgeous. You are an incredible writer and I hope to see more from you soon.
Yes, I figured out the IMU, but it took me until the fifth page.
Amazing story and I knew the m was actually a heart from the beginning. I loved the story!
realy turned my wife on we tried anal first time she begged for more
Loved it! And im a guy! Romantic and exciting!
This is one of my favorite stories, and one of the best ones i've ever read. I absolutely love the patio anal scene, the begging drives me crazy
I came to this story with a boner and a desire for some smut.
I left this story with a noodle and a spiritual experience.
I realized about two paragraphs in that this isn't literary porn, smut lit, or erotic writing.
This is prose poetry and beautiful storytelling hidden under a thin layer of sex that is so artfully written that it is a celebration of human love.
You, my dear sir, have just singlehandedly restored my faith in humanity.
You may take as many internets as you can carry.
Really loved it. Even with the taboo sex, you managed to keep it clean... And I knew it was a heart from the first time I saw "imu".
a well thought out story with a lovely ending,such a pity that people cant live like that, i loved my older sister but never showed her how much,
Lovely story. The concept of incest totally grosses me out in real life but I find it sweet and hot in stories. I think you managed to convey both the "hotness" of two young attractive and sexually driven siblings sharing a home, time and experiences plus the intimacy of two people who already love each other deeply because of their blood ties and having lived and grown close together going that step further into romantic love.
I didn't get the "imu" thing (well, I knew it had to mean that she loved him, which was pretty obvious, but I guessed it was in some kind of code), but the non-existence of Chip was obvious from the beginning, which was a good thing because it increased the anticipation for the reader regarding her scheme and the enjoyment of knowing more than "poor", unsuspecting, frustrated Richard and watching him suffer a bit there. Unlike other readers I find it totally unnecessary to describe how Lizzy tells her mother that she and Chip have broken up, or how they go on to live their lives and their love.
In short, a wonderful story, very complete and well-rounded.
I don't know what it is, but one day sibling love/sexuality suddenly became very enticing to me. There are few stories of the like that really appeal to me, and this is one of those few. I absolutely loved it. (:
sadly I figured out what imu stood for from the get go, to many artistic people around me.
The story was wonderfully written, and I loved the deliberate steps taken to capture her love, and how people don`t see what they don`t want to admit to till the very end and its on top of them. in this case a bit more literally. Keep it up, and loved every second of it.
I wasn't sure what imu meant, with her naughtiness I was trying to think of something naughty! I M Urs was my idea.. wonderful story. I don't find incest as something I would do, don't want to, never have wanted to... but the deep love and connection I enjoy in stories cannot be captured as often in other categories. Thank you for writing!
KNAWTYFLIRT
I draw hearts in two separate strokes, starting from the join in middle, so it never even occurred to me. Nice "puzzle" though. (And beautiful story!)