All Comments on 'Life as a New Hire Ch. 37'

I read your work too fast. Need 15 pages not 5 lol. Good work again FS!

Then later read it again at leisure, where I usually discover something I missed the first time.

Outstanding as per your usual, FinalStand! Bravo!

As always, eagerly awaiting the next chapter in this epic adventure. Many Thanks!

That paragraph, at the end. It was absolutely beautiful.

You wonderful, wonderful man.

Well done, bunches of New people with great background. Keeping the story fresh!

Thank you for sharing.

I have read this series from the the first day it came to this site and have throughly enjoyed it.

But I have to say it is getting far to complicated and political, while Cael needs to avenge the death of his father does he really need to become entrenched in political machinations that have ramifications worldwide.

FS can we please get back to something that does not involve, Chinese, Russian, North Korean or any military involvement from any country.

The premise of all the secret societies was enough to build an elaborate story without all this crap about countries armies strategic posturing and involvement.

I am sorry to write this because I like your writing style, premise and the main characters.

It has just become hard work to follow the story whilst wading through un-needed embellishment.

I wanted to establish the scope of the conflict so that when Cael does things, or things happen to Cael, it will make sense plot-wise. For example, now you know why the Seven Pillars want Cael dead in particular. Not just as an Amazon, but a real pain in their posteriors. If you think about it, Cael is the victim of the Augurs. They have totally screwed with his life. He can't turn away from a burden he doesn't want and feels horribly unprepared for. I hope I showed that in the very first chapter when he wouldn't let Rhada hit him twice...because it was plain wrong. He didn't want to love Aya, but he does. He wanted to be Captain Condom, but that's a lost dream too. Did Cael want to marry anyone, even Hana? No. He was placed in a position where he could save lives, so he took it. I'll give you a hint of 38 - it starts out with a sex scene with Lady Yum-Yum. :D

Contrarywise to the other commentators, I enjoyed the scope of this chapter. I thought your description of global maladroitpolity is imaginative and punctilious.

Though I still disagree on some specific details. Though these are my opinions not immediately verifiable facts.

Such as, that the Dali Lama would be wasted as Head of State for an Independent Tibet. He'd be much more useful as an Ambassador-At-Large Plenipotentiary.

Also, an Independent Tibet is a misnomer. An Autonomous Neutral Tibet (i.e. Switzerland or Sweden) would be much more viable. With guarantees of stipulated access from all neighboring nations corporate interests, to contracts for the vast material resources of the Tibetan Plateau.

In the long term the Senior Lamas would be more influential if they accept recognition and limitations similar to Catholic Cardinals.

The Condotierri and the 7 P it's better if they learn to swim fast, they are in a bloody water in close vicinity with Megalodons . And poor Alal , he thought Cael is an easy target . Wrong, not by Cael's choice , but he has more luck than brains ( he is smart enough but Lady Luck is in love with him ) .Lady Yum-Yum is a pleasant surprise and she can be an Amazon easyly and good friend with Saku.

With all problems around him , the big hunt will be just a walk in the park . If Cael will became the hunter and the hunters his prey , that fact will not be a big surprise .

By the time the Hunt comes around Cael's reaction will probably be - "Thank Dot! I finally getting a vacation!" Felix: "Dude, thirty Amazons are going to hunt us down." Cael: "Trust me. Compared what my life has been like for the past 84 days, this is Paradise." Felix: "That disheartening. Let's go kick some Amazon ass. You'll feel better."

I am loving this story, it just gets better and better, even with no sex (lol). Keep up the really good work m8

so happy to see another chapter and now so bummed it's over because waiting to read it is not an option. I'm like a junkie over here waiting on my next fix. Thanks FS!

Wow this chapter was wild. I was really glad to see some interaction with the council. These were woman that had recently voted to make Cael a stud horse in some pasture and a few weeks later he is giveing a war report. Remember they are still trying to wrap their minds around a male Amazon so just allowing him a 2 hour breifing is unreal. This story is awesome. You need to read it all through in 1 go to realize the time element. Cael has worked at Havenstone for like 58 days.

Thank you FS

this was an exceptional piece of writing, keep it up.

I feel Sean's pain at the complication of the storyline. You do an awesome job of putting some seriously tricky pieces together to form the fabric, but I can't help but wonder if there isn't a simpler way to do it.

Fuck I wished I could write this good. I can't bring this many pieces together in one story have it make sense. It has always come apart for me. My hat is off to you good sir in keeping this story believable and enjoyable.

I love your series, literotica has two categories for me, stroke stories, and stories I get into the plot. You started with the first and pulled me to the second, but your chapters are still lacking to me, you have so many followers so it probably doesnt matter to you, but here is my advice to you. People that have read 30ish odd chapters of this are in it for the story and love the characters. Don't drown us in background bullshit, keep to the main storyline. 3 of the 4 pages (the 5th was one sentence) I skimmed through, because while it has information to the story and world, it is too clinical and sterile to catch my interest, I would much rather read about the main plotline than random details about politcs. I also think when a story is this involved, and isn't just a stroke story, that it should be longer per chapter..... you should think about consolidating (because reading 30ish odd chapters of 3-4 pages is way more of a pain in the ass of than reading a few 20-30 page chapters). On that note, your work is good enough to be published, and it is already novel length, so keep it to more than just teaser bites please, even if it takes you longer, and keep up the good work

i enjoy the world building that you've done, but I feel you've moved away quite a bit from the personal interactions of Cael and more towards the global geopolitical descriptions. I want more of Cael doing awesome things, like sex and fighting, and less of how a floating oil structure was attacked.

Keep up the great writing FS

Thanks again for another imteresting installment. I've rather enjoyed the pokes you've been making at the geopolitical stage, just as I've enjoyed your humor with Cael's many relationships. Keep up the good wark. The sex is interesting as it is either detailed or glossed over, but the background and thought put into it is amazing.

My only quibble on a quick first run through for this chapter is about the attempted assassination of Hana. It was noted, but only a a quick note with Cael's hinted displeasure (Grr!), I'm curious what happened, but have no details. Cael might not have been there, but a summary as he found out would be nice. As a further incentive to go after whichever group tried it, I imagine he would be focused a bit more in considering it.

It was 'decided' that they would tell Cael that someone made an attempt on Hana's life, but to withhold the extent of the danger she was in. From the opinions of Hana, the E&S person on the scene and the Ghost Tigers, they had everything in hand. Distracting Cael would have been counter-productive. He's got to prep himself for the trials coming up over the next month. He's got to ensure the issue with the two Dragon houses is settled and confirm the status of the JIKIT(ies) ~ that the 9 Clans, Earth & Sky and Amazons feel comfortable. The previous three Chapters have formed the basis for the trust they have for Cael ... and to a lesser extent each other. The Great Khan has made the decision to focus Khanate interest through Cael. Hana was a nice bonus. The 9 Clans know that Cael has fought heroically in five major shoot outs, proving his worth as a 'young' leader, thoughtful and brave. Considering at one point the Amazons voted for Cael to spend the rest of his life in a cage. Since then, he has resurrected a Dead Fist House, saved hundreds of Amazon young at great risk to himself. Then he pushed Hayden until she perish and destroyed the 'Cult of Purity. Then Cael became Chief Diplomat, killed tons of Europeans, including Ajax. After only a few days on the job, he had Amazons teaming up with the 9 Clans in Japan. The effort in Tibet was a much bigger and more coordinated plan that played to the strengths of all involved. Now, by building up the background, I can now show a heavily burdened Cael leaning in his best friends - Timothy, Odette and Aya to helping him out. And, a whole new cast of women to pursue and to pursue him. Seeing how I've been up for the past 42 hours without sleep, I should try to crash.

Maybe, i am one... But i have to read all the comments along with the chapter to get a better understanding...

Being an Indian i am just curious, will India get any direct plot in the story.. Like Russia, japan & UK ??

By the way .. Fantabulous going.. Keep up the good work..!!

First, wonderful FS. I like how you have wove the background information in this chapter. You may have some detractors because of it, but thank you. It makes more sense of some aspects going on in Cáel's immediate life. Please keep up the wonderful work. Thank You! 5 *s once again.

I miss the style of the earlier chapters. You have added way too much background information, in this chapter I only really read a fraction of what was written. This story is one of my favourites, but the last few chapters with heaps of geopolitical and strategic explanations detract a lot of the stories appeal.

If you could compress that information and keep it simple it would make the read less of a "skip this and this and this" and change it to "oh now I get it, how interesting", plus it would decrease your research time immensely.

Started reading but ended skipping more and more backgrounds.

Too many acronyms, too many characters.

The story is loosing focus. 😬

I am amazed at how fast you continue this story! I became hooked on this story in Nov. and while waiting for new chapters, I read some of your other stories. "New Hire" is certainly your most thrilling - perhaps even more thrilling than Tom Clancy's - and I encourage you to continue it; But some year I hope you will revisit Cheyenne and Kidnap, and your One in Ten. Please keep up your very creative writing!!!

LesbianLumberjack

Hope you are sleeping as I write this.

Excellent chapter.

I continue to ask: Who gave the 7P the location of the Amazon's Summer Camp?

House Illuyankamunus???

I guess not after what happened at the Council meeting.

I agree with this comment. When you first started the story it was a favorite of mine and each chapter was anxiously looked forward to. I've put this chapter aside for possible future reading.

As something of a military and history buff I love the way than that you seem to have a reasonable explanation for everything that happens in the story regardless of how absurd the situation really is.

You do seem to be focusing more on the background to the story now but that's fine.

I've never posted a comment on any of the ten sites I read from but something in the comments that I've read here has prompted me to do so now.

I've enjoyed your writings, this one particularly, and I think they are very good and well thought out.

Your style of delivery is new, in some ways, and I think some people who read it forget how hard it is to bring relevance to a story without background information to go with it. Some people use flashbacks, transitional chapters or even several character plot lines that converge to achieve this back ground information. I like the way you slip it in where it's needed. If some people don't like this that's ok. You should slip even more nuggets of things to come in these chapters to keep the doubters interested in the stats.

The stories on this site are delivered mainly in serial format not in novel format and that's what I like about your writing. you leave the reader hanging for the next issue. Waiting for the next train or steamer to come in for their next fix.

As the Author you need to be happy with your work and I think you are. So keep it up and I'll meet you at the dock for my next fix.

Great job

Quick question: I thought Cael's baby count was just 3, 1 Ninja 2 Amazons. Did Ester also become Pregnant?

By the way, I love the detail and background for the story. It makes the interaction between the characters all the more richer.

Thank you FS

As far as my memory goes, Sabrina's appearance on this chapter is the first right? So before he left to Europe House Illuyankamunus isn't a dead house and Sabrina is the head, and what he's searching in Europe where other members of House Illuyankamunus and not the possible living member of House Illuyankamunus?Coz I thought Aliz family where the only existing member of House Illuyankamunus. Please kindly enlighten me...thnx =)

Yes, I know it is confusing, so I'll go back to the beginning of Amazon history: By the time the Amazon's formed their first houses, the God Illuyankamunus was already dead. Before dying, he had a daughter, SzélAnya, who was half-Hittite deity and half Cosmic Dragon. He gets killed the then Lord of Hittite pantheon in prehistoric times. Step forward to the Amazon exodus form their initial homeland on the southern shore of the Black Sea. A few Amazons, with the aid of the Goddess SzélAnya, form a new House, which the Goddess wants named after her fallen father - Illuyankamunus. To be of the bloodline of SzélAnya, you must have the blood of her sons in you. That means only the daughters of her sons (her granddaughters) can be Amazons of her house. Her great-granddaughters were adopted into other houses. That WAS House Illuyankamunus' dirty little secret. Step forward to the Second Betrayal and the slaughter of all the males ~ Illuyankamunus fought the decision, but gave in when the Host overwhelmingly voted for the Death Sentence. They accepted their own extinction. Except - one male of the house survived accidentally. He had sons and daughter who kept up the TRUE line House Illuyankamunus. The Amazon House of the same name found a means of survival without their matron Goddess which hasn't been revealed yet. The High Priestesses and Keepers of the Records have to have known this ... so ... 2500 years ago House Illuyankamunus accepted the judgment which guaranteed their own extinction. Now, fate has given them a second chance and, in a way, they are voting in a manner that could result in their destruction yet again.

To clarify, to be an Amazon of House SzélAnya (and the ancient House of Illuyankamunus (3000 years ago), you had to be a daughter of a man of the SzélAnya bloodline. The Goddess has been constantly replenishing (aka mating with her human males about ever 5 generation. Later she gives those men their 'newborn' sons to raise. Sons who are part dragon, divine and mortal human. If that man's child is a daughter, she becomes an Amazon. If the child is a son, he carries on the bloodline. That 'grandson's daughter will become the next generation of Amazons and the grandson's sons will carry on the bloodline. The granddaughters' offspring are NOT RELATED to the House at all.

That means the Professor Loma and his two sons are the future of House SzélAnya, not the Lovasz sisters. The Lovasz sister's father died in a train accident ... think about that. The sisters qualify as being Amazons of the house though ~ so they can protect their males until the next generation grows to maturity. The Professor's daughter, Djiana, would also qualify. Djiana could also qualify as a member of House Hylonome, because her mother had been (even though a renegade), just like Desiree qualified for House Epona.

I've been following this story since you first put it out and I have to say I've been looking less and less forward to each chapter. It started off somewhat complex, but at least it was followable.

I'm sorry but for the casual reader this story is all but impossible unless you're keeping notes upon notes. I'm looking forward to when we can focus on the actual story about cael instead of political nonsense that I will end up skimming simply because I don't care. You're adding a lot of detail in places that don't really impact your story much and leaving things that actually matter up to the readers to figure out.

The cast is freaking huge, I can't remember 100 names especially names in a foreign language, sorry. And then the connections you've created between the cast is outrageously complex.

If we don't start getting back into some actual plot related stuff I'm going to have to give up because quite frankly I'm not enjoying wading through 3 pages of political explanation to get to the real story.

Because between you and Etaski, I'd bet that consumption of NSAIDs has gone up a good 200-300%.

Getting too complex with explanations about stuff not all that interesting anymore....

UHAUL. Heh. Heheh.

I do enjoy the political backdrop segments, but I don't need to know the thought process of the commanders of individual battalions.

My favorite chapters remain those in which Cael deals with and deflects the rainbow of personalities that assault him within the context of Havenstone.

Hi Final Stand, I would like to thank you for my new-found habit of checking daily for a new chapter. Each morning I wake up full of hope that today will be the day a new chapter is released and when it is I am truly delighted, even when it is raining out. While, the story started out light with my main enjoyment coming from the witty remarks and banter the story has progressed to be so much more. Still full of the wittiness, but also it now has a intriguing and complex plot the makes me crave knowing what is going to come next. To me it is the extra details that some have referred to as background that carry this plot and without them the story would lose the detail that makes it great, which you have remarked on as well. So thank you FS and I will be anxiously awaiting the next one.

BD

I have been struggling with Chapter 38 do to my mental health issues. I have been writing a darker story called Ebb Tide, but I have resolved to not publish that monster until I post 38 first. I'm trying not to fall into old habits. The good news is that I added another 1500 words last night after a difficult spell ~ all dialogue. I will inform you right now that the first 1600 words are more "background" stuff ... except it is there to explain why he is finally bedding Lady (Yum Yum) Worthington-Burke. To some women, personal victory is its own aphrodisiac.

Well i have spent the last week reading all of the chapters in this series so far and i love it, i cant wait to read what happens next this story is just so in depth, and expansive, serious but also funny. I will admit this last chapter was a little tough to get threw but it was worth it i love all the information you put in the chapters about how one decision effects so many different nations. You are an amazing writer FinalStand i cant wait to see what your doing next for this series....... Thank you for a great story.

You need a map. Who knew that their was a country name Georgia

The Republic of Georgia is a very old country. It is named after Saint George. They became Christian in about 400AD. Russia captured them centuries ago. It is where Stalin was born. They fought along side of us in Iraq. Very good no nonsense fighters.

Checking every morning to see if there is any relief in sight!

Hey I am really enjoying your story, though I will say some of the background stuff is getting hard to follow. My favorite part is how the characters interact with each other. I am looking forward to your next chapter xx.

Okay ... I've been up 43 of the past 48 hours working on this beast. I've opted to send the first 11,000 words to my editors so they can start work on this. I'm praying to Fuzzy Bunnies and the Dark Elders of Innsmouth to get this thing done by 6 pm this evening. I'm at 23,000 words now and expect the Grand Total to be over 25,000. It is this side because - stupidly - I fixed on the ending cliffhanger and wouldn't let go of the idea of keeping this all in one chapter. I apologize for this huge wait. On the ... plus side ... I have about 100,000 words in other stories, {none of my current unfinished ones :( } but I'm trying my best.

I am looking forward to reading more in this story but please make sure you get some sleep! I don't want to see you burning yourself out for our benefit, no matter how much we enjoy reading your works :D

Well, at 4 am EST, I finished part 2 of Chapter 38 and it is off to he editors. An additional 16,200 words with a really tough scene to work through and I even had one neer do well ask me to remove it ... but I felt it helped make the entire chapter come together. Anyone, just ten hours past my self-imposed deadline ... I hope to have back from the editors and on Literotica by Saturday at the latest. Thirty-eight is finally done.

Cáel cries, Aya proves her metal.

FinalStand's last comment >

"Thirty-eight is finally done."

"one neer do well ask me to remove it"

sounds like something im going to find good

my reply to some commenters' replies >

"characters interact with each other"

"not involve, Chinese, Russian, North Korean or any military"

1 hana helped connect cael to E&S - fast enough to save temujin from 7P?

2 cael makes deal with E&S for hana, 'public' notices result of deal

3 russians went to hana - fast enough for cael to give them funhouse

4 at exact same time, cael got romanians because of russian support

5 getting romanians resulted in victory over greeks, not just ajax

6 greeks were sent by alal to either test or kill cael (and kill amazons)

(cael knowing about anthrax and illuminatus gets access to US assets)

"less of how a floating oil structure was attacked"

from a FinalStand comment >

"explain why he is finally bedding Lady (Yum Yum) Worthington-Burke. To some women, personal victory is its own aphrodisiac."

context would be her involvement in that operation and develops personal/UK relationship with Cael, with immediate emphasis on personal - sex

"context of Havenstone" - global entity involving assassination and war

cast - a name does not make someone part of main cast. there is supporting cast, main cast, and then much smaller cast that are currently active in scenes

background - if you skipped (didnt read) you cant comment on its contents

just because one chapter contains something, does not mean that all subsequent chapters will contain that something and nothing else. these kinds of 'conclusions' are the most bizarre.

For those that like the background of the story, 38 explains the Weave of Fate. This has been a major part of the story although FS has not always explained it as well as here. Bad things can happen to any hero.

You have a bunch of us hooked! Well done.

Chapter 38 ~ all eight pages of it ~ has been submitted. I've also submitted another tale, Ebb Tide Chapter One, which is already slated to come out tomorrow. Fear not, I've already written Chapters 2 & 3 of Ebb Tide. It is a seven chapter experiment to see if I can actually write a story with a preplanned beginning, middle and end. Hopefully this will educate me on being a better author. ET Chapter 2 should be submitted tonight, or tomorrow. LNH Chapter 39 should be a breeze to write as the end of LNH 38 reveals. I hope readers will enjoy 38 and I hope it was worth the wait.

Awesome awesone awesome awesome

Great job as usual on 37. I read it on the 21st when It came out.. and am waiting on 38 with baited breath (I need to brush more often). You are a great writer and I love the background information, it keep the story line fresh and interesting. Write what you want, you have the fan base that may complain. If they don't like what you do, encourage them to write their own stories.

All life has vagaries in it, some have more than others. Sleep my friend, and learn to record your thoughts so that you can rest.

Looking forward to 38.... BTW.. EBB TIDE Rocked!!!

Gemman

Several days ago I started at the very beginning and was extremely engrossed with this story. That is until around 22 chapter.

The interesting part was Cael and these Amazon women, who wanted to hunt him down and do to him some... interesting things. Then Iliuminati appeared. Ok, that was a total cliche but still acceptable.

Now? Now I'm reading global history instead of Cael's story and it sucks. It sucks about 7 or 8 chapters and I'm starting to wonder if I ever see that HUNT with Cael being chased to some ancient forest by a bunch of fervent women. I saw too many long stories, which went straight to bullshit. And I really want to know if author still remember, what he promised us at the beginning.

So, I'm still holding here. Keep writing.

Hi fs i have been reading this story for sometime. Its a great night time read for me, but since past few chapters its been losing my intrest due to its lenghty global history nd behind the scenes part. I would enjoy more of caels story. If possible make other things short. Rest its really awesome. Thanks for this wonderful read. :)

I started reading this b/c of the banter and interpersonal relationships. Imagine my surprise when it turns into a Fantasy military-political thriller. Congratulations sir, you are pushing all my buttons. This reads like John Ringo fan fic. Well done!

Thank you. Ringo is one of my favorite authors and I have to admit he has influenced what I see an author as. I 'teethed' on Tom Clancy, Harry Turtledove, David Drake and Eric Flint as well.

The writing style is very John Ringo, although you have different political views and more respect of other country's militaries, and if you have read paladin of shadows you'll know what I mean by a more sane character.

the protagonist has become very

reminiscent of Tyler Vernon

in the last few chapters

This story is far beyond the fantasy and sci-fi section that it should'nt be here. Also it's extremely racist. Really?? The Khanate invades China because it "belonged" to them? Absurd claim since the Chinese was in China first. Also that claim can be easily picked apart since if they made that claim why didn't the Khanate invade other nations they had previously conquered like India?

... I'll try to give a more in depth explanation to what is going on.

"This story is far beyond the fantasy and sci-fi section that it shouldn't be here."

***Where do you suggest I place it? I mean, I have divinities, secret societies and destinies working themselves out over a thousand years.***

"Also it's extremely racist. Really??"

***I did not invent the Mongolian-Turkish(nomad) vs. Han (agrarian) feud. I am unaware of a single century passing since the first Chinese Empire in which the Han have not have had to look to the northeast, north, or northwest to their troublesome neighbors. On multiple occasions, the Han took preemptive measures by invading the historical nomad lands and temporarily bringing them under their control. Still, the last "Chinese" Imperial dynasty wasn't even Han Chinese - it was nomad - the Manchu.

The Han have 'Just Cause' for fearing a resurgent Mongol-Turkish State. Such a thing has NEVER been good news for them.

In turn, over the past 300 years and accelerating over the past 60, the Han have been settling historical Mongol-Turkish areas in the northern and western People's Republic. They too have a 'grievance' against the Han.

I have no idea if this helps, but I gave serious thought to the outcome of this first phase of the war to the average ethnic Han family living in the 'Occupied Territories'. It is pretty horrid. There was no joy in my heart in thinking about the GENOCIDE being enacted on individuals who had little stake in this ancient struggle. Millions of Han are going to be FORCED MARCHED out of those territories to the east. The Human misery is not something I take lightly when writing this and I'm certainly not inflicting it on them because they are Asians.

Story wise, these fictional victims have the misfortune in living in the most powerful economy with the most powerful land army on Earth. Their Air Force, if not the Best, is nearly the Best. The PLA, PLAAF and PLAN are tough, professional bodies. The People's Republic of China and the Seven Pillars of Heaven are the Bad Guys in this story BECAUSE they are such Bad Asses. They make good, tough villains.

Please note, no government is this Good Guy in this story. Certainly no race is.

The BIG BAD GUY is Sumerian masquerading as an Irishman. As a race, the Sumerians are extinct. Arabs are a different and distinct people who migrated into the Mesopotamian region from the south and, along with the Iranian peoples coming in from the north, absorbed the Sumerians around 3000 years ago.

The Primary villains of the story from the start are a secret society of women made up of women of all Races (okay, I haven't had one who is Australian Aboriginal). They aren't even feminists as they don't give a crap about women outside their society.***

"The Khanate invades China because it "belonged" to them? Absurd claim since the Chinese was in China first. Also that claim can be easily picked apart since if they made that claim why didn't the Khanate invade other nations they had previously conquered like India?"

***That is Khanate propaganda borrowed from Real Life Russian propaganda. I stole a page of Vladimir Putin's Crimea Play Book. It doesn't make it right by any means.

According to the government in Beijing, not all Chinese are Chinese. The dominant ethnic group in China are the Han. There are dozens of other recognized groups who have a varied history in and outside of the borders of the Chinese state which has fluctuated over time.

Tibet and Manchuria being considered parts of China are relatively modern phenomena while for a time, Mongolia, parts of Siberia and northern Vietnam were part of China (if you ask the Chinese).

It helps if you take into account the relatively rapid collapse of the nomad powers of Central Asia. In 1650, they ruled from the Pacific to the Mediterranean in various Turkish and Mongolian dynasties. By 1900, the last two, the Ottomans and Manchus, were collapsing parodies of states, already long 'civilized' and soon to collapse. Russia's eastward expansion into Asia gobbled most of them up.

Most of the nomad peoples were left relatively intact so they never became 'Russians' and, in turn, the ones just over the Russia/China border never became 'Chinese'. When the leadership in Beijing began developing these 'backward' regions, they simply moved Han in from the east to do the work for them. To the Han, they were simply moving from one region of China to another. To the Turkish and Mongolian peoples native to those regions, these newcomers were Han and 'invaders' and that is a very real problem which exists today.

As for who they invade ... part of that is worked out in the story. Temujin and the Earth and Sky thought they would have more time, but they didn't so some Khanate diplomacy was actually decided by JIKIT (inadvertently).

#1 Problem: linking up Mongolia with Central Asian territories necessitated a war with the PRC. The E&S plan to use the Anthrax attack was a CONTINGENCY PLAN because everyone knew that launching a Biological strike was a bad thing from an international stand-point. The Seven Pillars forced their hand and Temujin attacked.

Geographically, the Khanate needed to seize the Xinjiang Uyghur and Nei Mongol Autonomous Regions, and Qinghai and Gansu provinces to secure Mongolia. Of that territory, only the eastern regions of Qinghai and Gansu were 'historically' Han though. Until the early 20th century, they were heavily Turkish and/or Mongolian. Ethnically, all the regions had huge Han Chinese populations by the 21st century.

The economic value of the land was also critical as they were resources the PRC desperately needed for their war-fighting and industry and the Khanate needed to sell, or control the price of.

The invasion of Tibet had political reasons though denying it to the PLA was paramount.

When you get to Shaanxi, Sichuan and Yunnan it was pure, naked aggression - driving as deeply into Chinese territory as they could for the purpose of disrupting economic life.

#2 Problem: liking the Western territories (Turkey, Azerbaijan, Armenia and Georgia to Central Asia is STILL a problem and had two solutions:

A) go north, through Russia or ...

B) go south, through Iran. If they go through Iran, they have to worry about the Pakistan-India dynamic on their flank. Actually, in my initial idea, the hope was Pakistan would feel like joining in a co-dominion with the Khanate. That left me with a hostile India ... so ... I began thinking from India's point of view.

I did more research and learned that the largest obstacle to India's growing economic influence is ... the PRC. The emergence of the Khanate is virtually manna from Heaven for the World's Largest Democracy. Mind you, the Khanate becomes a huge, aggressive ISLAMIC Super-state and India has a history of Islamic forces invading.

The difference this time is - Pakistan. I looked at the politics of Pakistan and couldn't figure a single way to finagle a Khanate coup and Pakistan had NO reason to cozy up to them.

But India would because becoming friends with the Khanate neuters Pakistan militarily. Pakistan won't fight a two-front war yet won't join the Khanate either. The GINORMOUS pain in India's ass since independence suddenly becomes the PERFECT Buffer State.

With the prospects of a free, independent and demilitarized Tibet - that is a second border area freed up of tension for India. WIN-WIN!

As the story progresses, India and the Khanate will grow closer politically. A further uniting force will be a matter of divergent forces. The Indians have a navy and the Khanate doesn't (not in the Indian Ocean, or South China Sea) and the PLAN is about to get pummeled.

A theme in the story is about personal commitment and by Chapter 45, the leaders in New Delhi understand that is how Temujin sees things and have decided to be friends of the Khanate and in doing so, challenge the position held by the PRC in Southeast Asia, the Middle East and East Africa. In the story, US and European influence is waning and India is the power on the rise.***

Anyway, I hope this mini-essay helps you understand the story better. Ugh.

James aka FinalStand

Just wanted to say thanks! I have been looking for a great story and this is awesome! It is rare anymore that I will have to go back and reread but i will with this one and I love it. Thanks again for sharing. To anamous below who was having a bad day and tried to call the author out...all books need a protagonist, this author picked a, to the western world, little known feud. That's not racist, that's good writing.

Chapters 36 and 37 are totally not understandable and very confusing

While you started strong, the last few chapters have devolved into socio-political and economic lectures and the plot has effectively stalled. This is where you differ from Ringo. He (or his editors) would have cut back most of the boring crap so that the pace and rhythm of the story continued. I do find your story very reminiscent of "The Last Centurian". But, I'm sure you lost readers with last few chapters as I myself found it difficult to continue without skimming and I like this style. I do hope you return to the previous pacing and minimize the lectures, as fascinating as they are.

Yeah ... I know. I'm not John Ringo, or Harry Turtledove, Eric Flint, Jerry Pournelle, Tom Clancy, or David Drake for that matter - all authors I deeply admire. I keep trying to hone my own personal style and sometimes I screw up the pacing (among other things). I consider this a learning process and the feedback helps. Thanks.

James aka FinalStand

Don't know whay that last person is talking about. This is my 3rd re-read and the back stories and trips into Cael's mind and hits take on the goings on in the world around him are a big part of why I like it so much. The details and motivations even if they're Cael's miss intpretations of those motivations really flesh out the characters and build the world.

I own a majority of the works of all the authors you listed. When I like something, I buy, and I re-read multiple times (I'd go broke too fast otherwise, and it really helps fill medical downtime ;)

That being said, I find as many things to enjoy while reading this story as any of those other authors' works. It's not that I enjoy your tale like I would enjoy a Ringo tale, it's that I find your tale to be a good use of my reading time, even when I could be reading a Ringo tale. As a worldbuilder and a story creator, you easily hold your own, even among that crowd.

Something that some of your commenters are overlooking is that professional editing is a major contributor to the cost of "real" published works. It's a lot more than mere grammar and spelling. It's knowing when to suggest that a section should be reordered for the reader's benefit, or that a (well-written) section needs to be cut because it is impeding the flow of the story, or that some truncated event or background should be built up and threaded into the existing narrative.

That kind of "whole story" editing is also much less amenable to volunteer labor for the same reason the professionals get paid so much: it takes a major commitment of time for an editor to wrap their head around a story (and author) enough for their suggestions and feedback to be more help than harm.

Your material is no worse than most pre-edit drafts, and is better than the equivalent draft material of some of the authors mentioned. I won't name names; anyone who really cares probably already knows who I mean, and their final product is wonderful however it is achieved.

Further, some of the negative commenters are rudely ignoring that you're giving us this story for free. Constructive criticism (or at least *intended-constructive* criticism) is one thing, but bitching that the free story we just read is crap and that the author is full of himself?

That's not just rude, it's stupid. Such a commenter is either too dumb to realize the result of demotivating an author, or malicious enough to want to make the author give up, thus robbing all the rest of us of the opportunity to keep reading an excellent story.

I'll finish up with two final things.

I find your story, characters, and worldcraft to be engrossing and well worth my time. Anybody who disses the quality of your work does not have honest feedback as a goal. Ignore them; it costs you nothing, annoys them, and ensures that the rest of us don't have to suffer from story withrawal ;)

More importantly: Thank you for sharing the product of your imagination and effort. You have at least one reader whose life would have been poorer for the lack of your story.

James,

In your defense I am one of the readers that truly enjoys the geopolitics of this fantasy epic. This chapter in particular "resonates" (wink) with me because I served as a US military advisor to the ANA 201st Corp (2nd BDE) in Kunar Province from 2012-13. I love the way you present the massive geopolitical shift that would be necessary to effect true and lasting change in the Middle/Near-East.

Not every written work will be appreciated by every reader, but know that you have at least one fan who enjoys this level of effort.

P.S. Major General Mangal was gone by the time I was there (2012-13), and Major General Waziri was in command of the 201st by then. Also, they pronounced the name of their dialect as "Dari", not "Dali". Just FYI.

That said your not John ringo lol.ive read hispaladin of shadows series and I gotta say this is almost as good.just because a chapter doesn't have sex doesn't mean this story isn't epic so thanx for the story.wich we don't even have to pay for lol.

-Steve

"dealt with other covet taskforce activities," should be "dealt with other covert taskforce activities,"

I'm sad that someone misunderstood my point. The TL;DR version: Ringo's stuff isn't any better than this, until late in the writing/editing process, and he has tons of professional editorial support!

Admittedly, it *was* the Great Wall of Text... It's a hobby I've taken up while waiting for more good chapters :)

To put it a different way: FinalStand's LANH manages to be pretty comparable to the works of a New York Times bestseller author, without any of the support and help that such a successful author receives almost automatically.

I think that, with similar editorial help, LANH would definitely not do worse than, say, the Paladin of Shadows series. Saying this is not a diss on John Ringo's skills, nor on FinalStand's skills. Rather, I'm imagining a world in which LANH was available in hardcover after being polished by a bestseller-grade editorial team, hopefully with dozens of sequels... it's a world in which I'd be *flat* broke, instead of just broke!

I know this story is done, but I had to comment. I've loved the humor and I disagree with the commenters referencing John Ringo. I'd compare these last few chapters to later David Weber: 80% Briefing, 10% New Character Intro, 10% Main Plot Progression.

That being said, I still love where the story is going and it is extremely well written. I have to admit that I am speed-reading/ skimming through a lot of the "Briefing" parts and miss the earlier style, but I'm still hooked. I want to see where this goes to the end!

Thank you for a great story and 5 stars all the way through.

Just a correction. Arunachal Pradesh has always been under India's control. It makes no sense India would give up claims to Aksai Chin for Arunachal which it already controls. Moreover India has the third largest Armed forces behind US and China and it would play a larger role in reality than portrayed in the story. India is the only country that can stand upto China in that region. I feel you ought to research more in the geopolitics and power dynamics of the region.

And just because I'm a bit of a 'grammar Nazi', the phrase is... "Lest we forget..." not "Less we forget..." .

Just sayen'... :)

My god that was a tough read felt like was in a history class I’d prefer more Cael less blah blah but your story and can’t deny it’s definitely well written just maybe shorter world history would make it better after all it is cael and the intern survive story isn’t it lol