All Comments on 'A Fissure in the Ice'

by Unsung Muse

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  • 21 Comments
rgraham666rgraham666over 18 years ago
An artfully written story

A very fine piece of writing.

In a single page the authour drew a complete picture of someone's life, character and emotions.

A fine piece of work.

Well done!

dreampilot79dreampilot79over 18 years ago
well done !

Well done piece of writing. I hope we see many more from you!

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Wonderful Work!

I can only echo the comments already made by others. A wonderful exploration of the self.

Bravo!

Boxlicker101Boxlicker101over 18 years ago
Interesting

description of a rather strange reaction to what seemed to be a normal invitation. Your description of the lady masturbating, if that was what it was, seemed rather Victorian. Not my cup of tea.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Absolutely perfect!

Lyrical, sensual and sexy - what more can you ask for?

Bravo! This is the kind of story any author would be proud to write.

Extreme BohunkExtreme Bohunkover 18 years ago
Erotic art

Wonderful job of capturing the person, her motives and the heat behind her actions without resorting to graphic description. This is not a 'stroke story', it's beautifully written erotica.

Selena_KittSelena_Kittover 18 years ago
Captivating

This was a beautifully crafted, finely sketched piece. Such haunting, mysterious, ghostly images painted here, the awakening of a tortured soul. Subtly erotic, the words themselves are the sensuous stroking in this story. Thanks for the opportunity to read it, I was enthralled. Good luck in the contest!

Chimney SweepChimney Sweepover 18 years ago
Unique!

Atmoshperic, lyrical and poetic. I can't write that way but you do it well. This was definitely a different breed of erotica (from mine anyway), all about sex and identity but containing little in the way of a "sex act." Very nicely done.

sacksackover 18 years ago
great first story....

very polished, professional, and solidly written. You can be proud of this!

AliyahlovinsexAliyahlovinsexover 18 years ago
:)

It was very erotic and your descriptions were incredible. Great work :)

Black TulipBlack Tulipover 18 years ago
Beautiful

painting. Very poetic use of the language. I enjoyed reading your story.

Good luck.

Black Tulip

dr_mabeusedr_mabeuseover 18 years ago
Beautifully written

But strangely cold, and devoid of emotion. Or was that intentional? In the end, I don't think her ice cracked at all, did it.

I suppose it's not easy writing an erotic story with just one character. The depth and subtlety you gave her character was appreciated, and it went far beyond what we usually see on Lit. I just wish we could have seen her interaction with her quondam lover at the party. *That* would have been fascinating.

Good job, though. Very erotic and inventive. It's good to see someone stretching the bounds. Look forward to seeing more of your stuff.

BlackShanglanBlackShanglanover 18 years ago
She had painted herself white.

What an intriquing first sentence. The story that follows does not disappoint. Intriguing, fascinating in its psychology, and beautifully written, this is a stylish and thoughtful piece.

Honey123Honey123over 18 years ago
Intense story

It was written beautifully ~ very poetic.

~Honey

NatalieRoseNatalieRoseover 18 years ago
a new art form

That was no mere story. That was a work of art. I've never thought of writing as art before, but you made the comparison undeniable. I think your talents may be wasted here. All the same, good luck with the contest.

hisemeraldhisemeraldover 18 years ago
Incredible!

This was unbelievably gorgeous. Such detail, such description... such a talent for painting pictures with words is born, not developed.

As you develop the talent it will create the precise feelings you wish in your readers, it will envelop them in the scene and lust.

Thank you for sharing this story.

I will you well in the future.

H.P. LustcraftH.P. Lustcraftover 18 years ago
Wow, again!

Hello again, After reading "The Seventh Snowfall" I looked for more of your work, I'm hooked. You truly have a gift.

H.P.L.

damppantiesdamppantiesabout 18 years ago
In awe

You're the only writer on Lit on whose stories I really don't know what comment to leave. It seems like whatever I write will not be enough.

asiaprofasiaprofover 17 years ago
You don't just paint word-pictures

but also conjure up

thoughts and feelings

out of thin air...

seducing me away

from this world

into a nothingness;

you are verily a

powerful sorceress!

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Wow!

I got caught up in your visual descriptions and had to stop several times to let my imagination cool down, then go back and reread to see what I'd missed . . .

Loved the understated note at the end. :)

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Wow !

Wow !!!

Anonymous
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