All Comments on 'Stimulus Bill Ch. 01'

thank you for this promising start that leaves open many intriguing and hot possibilities.

How hard is it to remember one "o" for lose (we will lose our house) and two "o" for loose (her pussy is loose)? If you had messed it up once it wouldn't be a big deal, but it was the whole story.

No wonder he lost his job. He's illiterate. Couldn't get past the first paragraph.

Yes, you need a proofreader. You should be able to find some editing help from other authors on this site. Repeated spelling errors, or grammar errors, does detract. However, with that said, the story line is strong and has great potential. You build the situation and characters well. I would hope that you would continue the story. There are a lot of avenues to explore and I could see this being a really hot narrative.

There were minor grammatical issues, but if people can't overlook some small errors for content they're morons. Promising start, I would recommend proofreading or getting someone to help edit but the concept and development are there for future chapters.

I shouldnt have to try to decipher the story. hukt onnn foniks dus knot werk inn litterachure.