All Comments on 'a Storm is Coming'

by EelunPhetmoore

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2 Comments

Ashesh9 almost 11 years ago

Storm as

aphrodisac ! excellent !

case28 almost 11 years ago

"I can feel the rain inside her"

Strong poem, nice intensity and a lot of great lines. It feels like there was a raw brewing energy when you wrote it.... must have been the hate. I've read it a few times, the poem is solid and deserves a 4.5. I just think the following lines need a little tweaking to improve the flow at this point...

wind

an itching

rain

an aching

thunder

burning

throbbing

I'm hard...

Maybe consider losing the "an" and playing around with the placement of the words....

wind

rain

thunder