by susansnow
Lots of evocative stuff.
Not too sure of the connect between first sentence, second sentence and thereafter. Suspect a full stop is needed after lips in the penultimate line - I read it that way anyway.
Love the 'whoever you are today' at the end.
I really like writing without the ugliness and demands of pesky punctuation. I guess I like enjambments and how they can make a phrase do something unexpected. I prefer to write 'all in one breath' the things that must come out as such; I hope this makes sense. Thanks for the feedback!