SPIDERCOW is indigenous to Parts Unknown. He is nocturnal and omnivorous, and has opposable thumbs. He has the power to fog men's minds. He would give his right arm to be ambidextrous. He is never found in a herd. He was in a movie once. He is bipolar-curious. Side effects may include nausea, shortness of breath, dizziness, double vision, quinsey, the yaws, libertarianism, and/or lycanthropy. Spidercow is not a game or a toy! Keep away from children. Spidercow loves you.