All Comments on 'Cross Country'

Great build and tension controlled the pace well, a couple of stanzas missed the rhythm but a great story lesse :)

"Shuffles off and stands...with his heart held in his hands" Very glad of that line and the happy ending

A poet's secret, Oldbear, I wrote the whole poem around those couple lines, not the norm for me but it was such a strong mental image I had, I had to write it.

Starts that way a lot for me. Sometimes things flow from a line, sometimes they don't and they get tucked away for a more creative day. Lots of times I junk them.

Did you think of other scenereos to wrap around those lines, or did you go right to the railroad station? For instance, what if he left his lover angry and then came back?

I had the mental image of the lines, the rest just came out, I almost ended it with the second to last stanza but the last one just followed out my fingers... It's just a poem... This particular poem was meant to amuse more than anything, a lighthearted jab at a fantasy...

Young couple ?

maybe now our journey will be complete, TK U MLJ LV NV

It evoked a perfect visual for what he was experiencing. Nice.