All Comments on 'I Go'

Reads well and rings true. Fflowing. Ffrank, and Ffabulous!

Wow! This was excellent! I felt this one.

I'm just wondering if it would've sounded better without so many "your" and "you" words:

This moment expands,

Stretching out beyond my knowing.

Your hands hold my head as

Your tears touch me.

I comfort you in your grief,

Smile gently to ease your loss,

And do not speak of the pain that

Rends us.

Hmm..

This moment expands,

Stretching out beyond my knowing.

Your hands hold my head as

Tears touch me.

I comfort in your grief,

Smile gently to ease your loss,

And do not speak of the pain that

Rends us.

Thanks for the read, sal

very good. Thank you.