All Comments on 'In the Attic'

A very solid poem- good structure and flowed nicely. The second to the last stanza was a bit rocky. I was thinking you should've broken it up into two stanzas or prehaps taking out some of the "and" words or adding commas where needed. Over-all, excellent poem. Thanks!

This I REALLY liked!

Picking them up, I

realize they're not the

random bits of this

and that I had thought

they were when we

played our games among

the totes and chests and

Nana's stacked Avon boxes

under the slanted roof of

their old home.

The more I read of yours the more I'm impressed. This has some simply beautiful lines that let us look through a grown child's eyes.

Tess

I truely enjoyed the perspective you tantalized in this write, excellent poetry Remec

I really like this: "So umbrellas are guns" That made me smile.

"Children handle things in

play without a care as

to what they are, only

what they need to be."

amen.

I have to think on this, there is so muchc promise in this paragraph... you could do a whole series on this theme.

Well written, I could see it all, down to the avon boxes, mind you, not the actual glass pipes and dolls or the perfumes inside... the boxes. That says so much, the image of the stacked containers... it is the mark of a generation.

Thanks--

Anna

delighting the eyes of the muse..enjoyed..blue

in one way or the other has identified my thoughts too. i wish i had gotten to this one sooner......it's a nice write......loved the stanza with the children......don