by DeepAsleep
At first I thought this mildly cute even if trite. Then upon rereading I began to recognize expressions and slightly altered phrases from the work of others.
It is different enough that I will only call it highly derivative.
...what part of "(Variations on a theme.)" that Anonymous failed to understand. The only derivations are those variations.
Personally, I think this piece might need to marinate a bit longer, but is worth that time. My only objection is a personal distaste for lines such as "__________ of the mind", but that is cast in the cauldron of the sixties, when every third poem (mine and others) had the same refrain.
But then again, we're talking about variations...
Your voice is felt, distinct. I don't know what to say that won't have been said before, but I do know that not everyone quite knows how to say what they must say. You always seem to. It's more than a pleasure to read your work.