All Comments on 'radiation leak'

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I'm going down the new list and I'm amazed at the talent we have here. Liar, you're an excellent poet!

I love brilliant poetry to start my day. The first stanza is magnificent!

...with Eve and Syn. You're good!

...great stuff, as everyone has come to expect from you!

You rawk.

(Yeah, I give sucky feedback, too :D)

Had you ended after the second stanza it may have read much like a Dorothy Parker lament, perhaps not as much humor, but certainly a sharp skewering of love. But the last stanza rewrites the tragedy, instead of flying off and hiding from her tears, he sticks around and from the tears shed of a lost relationship, another grows.

I loved the images as her tears smudged her writing to the dismay of the guy passing too closely. They certainly turned the page and began writing anew.

This one read with a fairly nice flow that at times seemed to carry a meter here, enough so that I scanned it a bit on one of my reads. I had to wonder whether you tried to tighten it up into a meter whether it would add to the poem or diminish the easy flow. I alluded to Dorothy Parker above, she often wrote in a meter alternating between 5 and 6 syllables in a line, which seemed to fit what you had written (that's one reason why your poem made me think of her). It might be something to play with, adding a touch of flair to an already very good poem.

jim : )