She who I used to love.

Goodbye,
I used to love you know, I'd feel so good when ever you were near, close enough to talk to.
I used not be able to keep my eyes off of you when you you were here, always feeling my heart beat so fast, my tongue twisted so hard I could hardly talk straight.
Whenever you were near I'd used to feel so grateful to who ever or what ever blessed me with the chance to talk to you, and feel so sad whenever you walked away and me not saying anything.
And all this continued for so long, all these feeling, adoration, and ,if I'm being honest, love.
Then I finally, finally got the courage to ask you out, and what did you say..... no. You said no the first time, even going so far as to say it would be better if we could be friends.
Of course after that I annoyed but I didn't give up, picturing us together hopefully with true love and no problems.
But well after that I realized I may have overestimated my charm and how should I put it...... my appeal.
So I, with all my will power, decided that if I was going to have any chance of being with you that I could simply be friends...for now.
And all of that hope came crashing down when I found you were engaged.
With that I was in shock, not that you had someone but that I never even considered during my time fantasizing that you would find some one else.
But as i fell out of my shock and realization set in, my feeling surprising not as extreme as I initially thought they'd be.
But as I settled down my mind and truly began to think about the situation, that I never really got to know you.
Of course I tried to get to know everything I could about you but any fact or flaw that I didn't find attractive I simply ignored or simply pushed to the back of my mind.
So with that thought truly enlightening me I put my head to the ground and got to work trying to get to know, and really as got see you more clearly I realized with a frightful amount of obsession you were not who I imagined, not who I fantasized, not who I...... thought you were
So with that I decided to go on a vacation to clear my head, and hopefully my heart.
So with my days way, from all the stress and drama, from work, and from my own delusions I decided to simply breath.
Breath in all the nature that surrounds me, the air refreshingly clear with life itself, and breath out all the problems.
Well I would like to tell you that with all that all my problems went away, but in truth it didn't do a damn thing.
Well it did help me find inner stability for a bit but whenever I thought of you, all the conflicting emotions would come flooding in.
And that is where I made( looking back now) one of the best decisions of my life,
I got help.
And through a lot of time I finally went to a psychologist and addressed my issues through the... proper channels.
And through talking through it for months at length we finally were able to talk about my own problems.
It was actually really simple, the problem I mean, it was I had a tough family and well I projected my own solutions onto the dream of the perfect life of you and me. This took months to figure out but in conclusion to simply put, I was in love with the dream not t person.
And now that its been addressed and I've finally gotten this out of my system, I wish to get to the most important part of the letter my thank you.
For you see in full honesty while yes there was some attraction that I felt towards you, I would have probably would have reacted this way towards just about anyone.
So I wish to thank you for being so patient and kind with me when I was being so......creepy.
I know you have long since moved on with you life and love, but back when I was obsessed you were very nice to me when others may have made my problems worse.
So with all this you have taught me a very important lesson, that all relationships
are based on communication, and when you don't stop and consider your own action you can do some very inappropriate things. So I would like to thank the person you truly are. And let go of the "woman" I used to love.
Goodbye