by Safe_Bet
It has all the oomph and energy of a Souza march, which works well with the theme. I see places where you can edit it down some, and one line(the third)is not so clear to me--I think you're trying to pack too much info into those few words. But those are nitpicks and easily fixable: the theme and tone are perfect. :D xo, S.
Hi! Your poem has been mentioned in today's New Poem Reviews: http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.p hp?t=254157&page=129
Shouldn't it be Sapphic? I dunno.If you considered dropping a syllable or 3 in the first couple of lines it might read a little better, but good fun