All Comments on 'thie moment (iiii)'

by twelveoone

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  • 14 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago
Thie knot

There are slavish souls who carry their appreciation for favours done them so far that they strangle themselves with the rope of gratitude.

twelveoonetwelveooneabout 13 years agoAuthor
My Dear Anon,

Your comment makes no sense to me. I am assuming you don't mean Polish, so here goes. I assume you are referring to me:

1. Of or characteristic of a slave or slavery; servile: Her slavish devotion to her job ruled her life.

2. Showing no originality; blindly imitative: a slavish copy of the original.

Neither one seems to fit very well. I do appreciate the attempt. I also admire someone that pays attention.So I'm sure you'll be back. Cheerio.

twelveoonetwelveooneabout 13 years agoAuthor
added

typo should read this not thie, roman numeral iii not iiii.. Ah, well.

SeattleRainSeattleRainabout 13 years ago
~5~

You have the ear, a visual poem with the sounds built in.

Snakes in the grass

or

Sisyphus in the grassiphus.

If you are condemned to do it again, how do you know from whence you begin and to whence you return?

greenmountaineergreenmountaineerabout 13 years ago
Not a fan of Superman

Nor of Eternal Return for that matter, but did like the poem for all that it evoked. What can I say? I was brainwashed by Jesuits and Dominican priests who taught me metaphysics.

I also liked how you used rhyme to tie the 2 stanzas together without over doing it as well as the effective use of repetition which emphasizes, of course, Eternal Return.

greenmountaineergreenmountaineerabout 13 years ago
On Second Thought...

When I read it again (actually, I read it 5 or 6 times, which I hope you take as a compliment), given the italics, I wasn't sure if you were mocking Nietsche's Eternal Return or agreeing with it, and "that snakes/trod down in sage grasses" strikes me as mocking also. Either way the poem works for me because of what it evoked as I said in the previous comment.

UnderYourSpellUnderYourSpellabout 13 years ago
~

well I'm glad someone is still writing poetry on here instead of drivel

bogusagainbogusagainabout 13 years ago
loop loop loop

For ever looping back on one self, the universe as Groundhog Day.

Natty little poem, it is one of those that get under the skin and prompts thought loops. Morality in a godless universe disintegrating to be renewed or am I reading too much into it and missing your joke? Though being condemned to do it all again is joke enough.

vrosej10vrosej10about 13 years ago
Nietzsche was a tool...

But it just proves you can get a great poem out of a pile of dog shit. Great sonic patterns in this one. This is my favourite of your stuff I've read. I don't recognise a form but this is probably my stupidity not your writing. I gave it a five and I would recommend it but I know how you hate it when people double up on the recommends.

Maria2394Maria2394about 13 years ago
:)

what Annie said. As I am too ignorant to come up with a comment of my own. Besides, hers was plenty good enough to steal.

~ maria

buttersbuttersabout 13 years ago
the snaking path

the symbol of infinity, or at least that's what i picture. a path that leads back to its own beginning, like the dragon swallowing its tail.

the gateway - this has me wondering... gateway to knowledge? to other existences? why do i see the symbol of pi as the gateway? i don't know enough about the historical/mythological to make clear connections, but i think i have read enough from you to understand all things are connected and not merely random. i just wish i were better informed as to the connections. perhaps you could elaborate, if you have time, over in the TKTRTC thread.

i am sure the epitaph 'He wept for an Ass' has connotations i don't understand, but as of now i read it with a duality: a soft-hearted man who could weep tears for something considered a beast of burden (etgo: something less than himself)/he wept for the mistakes he'd made and was doomed to make again...

your deliberate duality of the snakes/trod down lines reads to me more about a snaking path that the narrator travels, and it is the N who is 'trod down' by 'wisdom' after the event - perhaps the proffered wisdom of others, as plentiful as grasses...

nice use of sound throughout to bind the imagery.

buttersbuttersabout 13 years ago

grrr - ergo, not etgo. *rolleyes*

WilliamButlerYeatsWilliamButlerYeatsabout 13 years ago
Sancho wept

over the loss of his ass. It was a touching moment. Ecce Homo et al. Good writing.

WillowedCabinWillowedCabinalmost 13 years ago
Great men are always misunderstood, and therein lies their greatness.

In the spirit of this,

Bravo.

Anonymous
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