All Comments on '18 With The Wind Chill'

Would love to see this continued!

I liked the story, well written. I prefer a little longer story to one that is rushed. Thank you and keep writing

I get enough negative comments on my stories without having to suggest them to the readers. Most of what you listed is not true of this particular submission anyway.

I had a feeling I was not going to like this story enough to finish it but it grew on me and snuck into my head like a trashy, tawdry TV soap opera and I became interested in Tiffany's plight. I knew I was hooked when I found myself envisioning what the ladies looked like.

The dialogue was good. The descriptions of the sex were above average and believable. As for grammar and spelling, I couldn't tell if the few mistakes were genuine errors or deliberate attempts to mimic a Cajun red-neck way of speaking. In any case, they did not detract from the story.

I started out getting the impression that Leeanne was going to find something sinister and incriminating on one of the computers she worked on but you didn't follow up on that little tease. Still, there is plenty of potential for a continuation of these four women's adventures and I hope you do a follow-up.

You know, you take take all the fun out of it if you hit on yourself like that. I didn't think it was too long, I would like to see the story continued, and yes it does jump around a bit but so what. Think it was a great story and you can still do a lot with it. Keep writing.

The short stories always feel rushed and unbelievable. Too bad you didn't twist Ms Dumas into the trio at the end.

I hope to read more, thanks

Wonderful writing in full-on stream of consciousness flow. Mostly observational ...judging is secondary. Looks so easy to emulate until you try it. I thank the author for sharing.

Full marks * * * * *

Putting all of your character's backgrounds at the beginning felt top-heavy. It might have been better to sprinkle it through the story, and reduce it overall.

Loved this story, but it's unfinished. More please!

But the author doesn't know the meaning of the word "rotunda". Minor complaint.

Good sexy tale with humorous scenes.

This is a great story it needs to continue

Hope Leeanne finds herself someone. Felt sad for her that she lost her soldier. She doesn't strike me as one of the ones Jody could have stolen, so really hope she finds a good man. Or woman.

Side note: who uses .32 anymore?

Well written. Look forward to reading more

The character of Leanne is intriguing...

It, was a warm, heart felt story I thought, I had five sisters, well, five brothers to, but I recognized two of my sisters in this.

But would really love to read more of it? Perhaps a follow on that has Leeanne & Tiffany get closer? Thanks for sharing this with us!

Would like to see a 2nd part, where they use 2 strap-ons on each other

Love the story, the history of the lead character/s as the story continues. Everyone wants to rush to the sex and ruin a good story. This is a story worth reading and enjoying while waiting on the next installment to post. When a story leave u wanting more that's a good story in my book any day of the week. This story did just that and more.

Don't beat ursf up at the end anymore leave that for the hater who want to write but is too afraid to try.

One last thing I live in Lafayette and o bae-bae we love our cajun dialect. Have fun with it. Lagniappe if u know what I mean. Use the Cajun French language. Laissez les bons temps rouler. Pronounced "(Lazay-Lay Bon-Tom Roulay)" Let the good times rolls.

it is not too long,or need an editor it is just perfect the way it is!!

2

What can I say, I am getting addicted to your stories. Always have a good plot and theme to them. Not all this right away sex. Love to see the seduction in your stories.

An after 19 years where all four of them are together and then they bring in the daughter or son.

Leeanne was just left twisting in the wind. All beautiful now and nobody to love.

I kept wondering if she would become Tiffany's girlfriend. She was very protective of Tiffany.

I also wondered what would happen when Tiffany has the baby. You think the twins would like being "aunts" to him or her?

So many loose ends left dangling in a great story!

Did Tiffany ever give birth to her baby because in another story it sounded like she was going to pop.

Fun romp, thank you.

Thanks for sharing your work!

Really liked that, thanks

Did the twins and Tiffany actually start a relationship or did they just have sex once or twice