2024/01/12 - The Confession - 01

"Yes, D-Day. Wow, Tim, you even had a name for it. It makes it sound like it was a precision operation or something."

"Oh, and it was. Marcie, Dad left for work at 7.30 that morning. No suspicious goodbyes... just the usual grunts. It was breakfast time. We had bought some sandwiches the night before and some canned coffee drinks, and hid them in the veggie crisper where Dad never looked. We nibbled as we worked. Couldn't get slowed down with food prep. We got out the packing tape, set up the boxes, got out the list, packed our stuff, loaded the SUV, took a final bathroom break and a pre-escape shower. Then we took the loaded SUV to a rent-a-car in a nice part of town and rented a cheap sedan. We had envisioned the worst, that Dad would get mad and damage the SUV, flatten the tires, throw our packed boxes all over the lawn. We needed a bit of insurance that we might be able to make a clean getaway. So then we drove the small rental back home. It was 11.30."

"Marcie, I can still see it. Mom put her wedding rings in a drawer in the roll top desk, and then called Dad at work and told him he needed to come home for lunch. It was a family emergency. He wanted details and she told him to just get here but that nobody was injured or anything so he didn't have to race here. He got home about 12.15 and came storming in asking about the little piece of shit car in parked next to him the driveway. He saw us sitting together on the couch and wanted to know what was going on. She just said 'Steve, please sit down.' He refused to sit and he took a step toward us and puffed up his chest menacingly. I jumped up and scowled him down into the easy chair across the room. She told him that we could no longer live with the abuse and that we were leaving. He bellowed and she nervously wrapped her arms around mine. He wanted to know who 'we' were that was leaving, and she said 'Tim and I are leaving together.' He was reading our body language and he was reading it accurately. He came right out and, pardon the language, asked if we were fucking each other."

"Holy shit, Tim, pardon MY language. Did he really!?"

"Yes he did. And, Marce, I answered that the sex was just one facet of it... that we were in love with each other, that she was my heart and soul, and that we were leaving to make a life for ourselves together. He sank back into that easy chair. I watched him deflate. He looked sad and beaten. All the bluster was gone. But I was taking no chances that it was gone for good. You know what they say about the stages of grieving a loss, that after the shock and denial comes the anger. I decided to take advantage of his shock and not wait around for the anger. I whispered to Mom and asked if she trusted me completely. She nodded and I grabbed her hand and said Let's Go. We walked to the door without looking back and got out of there. We took the rental back, and hopped in the SUV and she drove us east toward Philly. We didn't say a thing for the first half-hour. Then she pulled into the McDonald's in Irwin and simply said 'bathroom break'. We did our thing, met at the counter and got some burgers and coffee."

"Marcie, she wanted to sit down inside but I told her we needed to talk, it had to be now and it had to be in the privacy of the car. We wolfed down our lunch and then I took her hand. I told her that we hadn't really discussed it but that I wanted to make some things clear and that it could not wait. I told her that I considered her to be my mate... my life's partner... my wife in everything but name only. I told her that if we were to live openly as a couple that I couldn't go around calling her 'Mom.' And then I declared my love to her, declared my faithfulness to her... that I was making a lifetime commitment. And then after a pause, I added 'Elaine.' She said she was making the same commitment to me, she cried a bit, hugged me, we shared a kiss and got back on the road. She drove on for a few more hours. We spent the night in a motel north from Philadelphia. We collapsed on the bed in our clothes and rubbed each others heads and hands and just decompressed."

"We woke up to a new day, walked out of our room into the morning sunshine, looked around and saw that we hadn't been followed. I tell you, Sis, we felt free. I told her right there and then that this was the first day of our new life. We checked out, I kissed her outside the SUV and took the keys from her hand. She saw the symbolism. Her man was going to drive the family car. We went for breakfast. We looked at each other. We had never known such happiness. I held her hand across the table. A simple thing like that. For the first time we didn't have to hide it. We just kept saying 'I love you' to each other over and over across the table. It felt so wonderful just to say it that we couldn't stop. And we couldn't stop smiling. Our poor waitress could barely get our order out of us. We drove another few hours and got a modest motel room in Litchfield, Connecticut. We stayed there for a few weeks. We both got jobs. Then we were able to rent a small house in the countryside outside of Litchfield. The first chance I got, I bought her a diamond engagement-wedding ring set. Got down on one knee while we were having a picnic in a park. Ha ha... She said yes."

"Timmy, I can tell by the sparkle in your eyes as you tell it, just how happy you were. How at peace you were. It sounds so idyllic. But, wait... Mom and Dad were still legally married. Dad didn't like to talk about the divorce. It's almost as if by ignoring it he was wishing it all away. How did Mom get that resolved?"

"Actually, Sis, before we left, another one of the preparations was a visit to a divorce attorney. She just got him on board and said that instructions would follow. Once we got to Litchfield she sent a letter to Dad through her attorney so he couldn't trace our location. She said that if he filed, he could have what was left in the bank, keep the house and its contents, she would ask for nothing and would not contest it. She told him where he could find her wedding rings in the desk drawer if he hadn't done so already. He filed within the week. He used irreconcilable differences. No adultery or anything like that. Mom got the impression that he was just looking to avoid scandal and make the whole thing go away quietly. It was over and done with relatively quickly."

"So you seemed to be nicely settled in Litchfield. Tim, what made you leave there and come to Crompton, Rhode Island?"

"We got arrested."

"What!? Arrested!? Timmy? Both of you?"

"Yep. Both of us, Marce. Arrested for committing incest."

"I... uh... I mean, Timmy, how would anybody know?"

"Well, Marcie, we had a baby!"

"What! You and Mom?"

"Me and Mom! Marcie, you have a nephew. His name is Adam and he is 25. Mom fell pregnant a few months after we got to Litchfield. The divorce was finalized a few weeks before her due date. That took some of the stress off the situation. She gave birth to a healthy baby and she did just fine herself. She was 43. I was 20 and a first-time parent. When Adam was about 18 months old, he had a minor medical issue. The doctors did a blood draw and checked his DNA. The doctor was required by law to report what he had discovered. The mitochondrial part of it that pointed to his maternal lineage showed markers that the baby and his father both had the same mother. Bingo! Incest! They arrested us and the state took Adam. The penalty for consensual incest between two adults is between 1 and 5 years in Connecticut. We had a good lawyer and we were sympathetic defendants. Our guy explained our situation to the prosecutors and the judge. Nobody really wants to pursue these cases unless there are minors or coercion involved, but once the cat was out of the bag, their hand was forced."

"Dear God, Timmy. Did you guys go to jail?"

"We did indeed, Sis. We worked out a deal. We would plead guilty in exchange for the minimum 1-year sentence. Mom would get her tubes tied and there would be no more children. They agreed and gave us two options. I would do my year first and leave Adam with Mom. A baby needs his mom. Then I get out and Mom would do her year. That means Mom and I would not see each other for two years. The second option was more attractive so we went with it. We would do our sentences at the same time and only be apart for 1 year. Since we were estranged from family members, the court agreed to put Adam into the system for that year, or less if we got early release, with the guarantee that we would get him back once we were out. We did get out early, for good behaviour. We were away for only 8 months. Adam barely remembers his time away from us, as he wasn't even 3 years old yet when everything ended. We still had probation hanging over our heads. We could not have any more trouble with the law. We could get arrested for jaywalking and be forced to finish the last 4 months of our sentences. Another condition of probation was domicile and employment. We had lost our rental house once we couldn't pay rent from prison. Plus the landlord was glad to be rid of a couple of degenerates, even if he had liked us before he found out."

"Our lawyer rented a tiny flat for us over a store in Litchfield in his name and we paid him. Mom worked in a library at a liberal prep school. Marcie, they embraced everything 'alternative' so she had little trouble getting her job back. Me, that was another story. I had been doing construction and a lot of those guys were less tolerant of anything alternative, so after two days back, they sacked me because I was supposedly too much of a distraction. The boss said he couldn't, pardon my language, have his work force uttering the word 'motherfucker' all day long. So, to fill my parole requirement, I did odd jobs, you know, build a deck or pour a patio. And I had to be sure that nobody peeked into our window and caught us in bed. A second conviction for incest would make us repeat offenders and we would likely get the 5-year maximum sentence this time, and lose Adam permanently. We did some consulting with our attorney and learnt that the laws governing incest vary wildly from state to state. For example, at one end of the spectrum, you have a few states like Montana where the maximum sentence is life in prison! Yet there are two states where incest is legal as long as both participants have reached that state's age of consent. New Jersey and Rhode Island. So, Marce, you wanted to know why we are in Rhode Island, and there is your answer"

"That's amazing. Tim. How soon after you got out of jail did you come here?"

"Well, Marce, we had to let the court know where we lived as part of our probation, but we only had a few more months to go. We didn't want the hassle, so we waited till our probation ended, and left the very next day. Same scenario as before, only now add a toddler. We stayed in a motel for a few weeks, got jobs, lined up daycare, moved into a decent rental, and the following year we bought the place we still live in. It was a tiny fixer-upper on a big lot, which was all we could afford. But my construction background came in handy. I did most of the rehab myself."

"I remember that Tim, you know, when you were a kid, back when we all lived together, that you were handy that way. Good with your hands. Hard worker."

"Yeah, that was it for me. Now I own my own construction company. I employ 15 to 20 guys at any time. Adam works there, too. Mom and I have had a comfortable life since we moved to Crompton. And we blended right in. I'm Tim Elliott, and she was already Elaine Elliott. All anybody saw was a younger husband, his older wife, and their child."

As if right on cue, a young man appeared at their table. "Speak of the devil.... Marcie, I'd like to introduce my son Adam. Adam, this is my sister, your Aunt Marcie."

"Oh my God! Your son! Adam, it is so nice to meet you. A nephew! I have a nephew!"

"Well Aunt Marcie, the pleasure is mine. I've got an aunt," then added in a confidential tone, "and I also have a half-sister. Ha ha, don't forget, Dad is also my half-brother. Heck of a family tree we've got going on here."

Marcie mockingly held her head as if it might explode, and said "Tell you what, Adam, let's keep it simple. Can I just be Aunt Marcie and you can be my nephew?"

"Aunt Marcie it is. You've got a deal!"

"So Adam, when did you find out about.... everything?"

"They sat me down on my 18th birthday and told me the story."

"Oh wow, that's some birthday surprise!"

"Well Aunt Marcie, I was more surprised that they were finally telling me than I was by the news itself. I had been putting the pieces together for a few years. Mom and Dad seemed to mention incest a lot more than one might expect. They were always very libertarian about love. They planted it in my head that while certain things were less common than others, and while all members of society may not agree in all instances, there is nothing weird about alternative lifestyles in and of themselves, as long as no minors are involved. They instilled me with the values that two consenting adults should be free to love who they love. This naturally came up when I first noticed anything that you might call alternative. And that was when I first became aware of what a gay couple was. What homosexuality was for men and women. And my folks would always say sometimes it's two men, sometimes it's two women, and less frequently it might even be a threesome. And occasionally they would throw in that there are even rare instances of family members. Uncles and nieces, aunts and nephews, brothers and sisters, mothers and sons, fathers and daughters. As I got older, and began to have questions about my family, you know, grandparents, aunts and uncles... who were they and where were they... I began to notice that I was getting unsatisfactory answers. I mean I knew that Mom was older than Dad, and I knew that it was by 23 years. My imagination ran wild as to what the possibilities could be. And I recalled the times they had mentioned being tolerant of incest. So the thought did come to me. When they came clean on my birthday, I was not all that shocked. I think the thing that blew my mind most was when I examined our relationships. Elaine is my mother, but because she is also my father's mother, she is also my grandmother. Tim is my father, but because he is my mother's son, he is also my half-brother."

And at that moment, another figure appeared at their table. "Hello, Marcie."

Marcie leapt to her feet and, predictably, the tears came. "Oh my God.... Mom! Oh Mommy... Mommy it's you.. oh Mommy!"

"Baby."

They clutched each other and wept. Tim almost stood up to join the hug, but this was a mother and child moment. From the day he'd fled Pittsburgh, he had traded in being Marcie's brother for the new position of being Elaine's husband. For the first time in years, he had to decide where he fit into the family dynamic, and he was frozen with indecision. In the end, he just let things play themselves out and set up a place at the table for Elaine between himself and Marcie, and then gave Elaine a peck on the lips, the way a husband and wife typically do.

"Oh baby, just look at you. What a fine woman you've grown up to be! I don't regret my life with Tim, but I regret what I've missed. A family from what we've been able to gather."

"Mom, I'll tell you what I told Timmy. I'm married and divorced. He was Sal Vetro. A guy I dated on and off my last year of college. So I still go by Marcie Vetro. We split 8 years ago. He had a bad temper like Dad and it all just broke down. We had two great kids. Polly is 23 and Sal Jr is almost 21 and we call him Bud. So Adam, you have two cousins."

Elaine couldn't help herself, and she asked the question that Tim hadn't been able to; "So Marcie, tell me, how is your father doing these days?"

Marcie got quiet and looked down in a way that answered the question. "He passed away six months back. I was dreading telling you, but his death was the thing that really motivated me to get off my ass and finally come to see you. I thought you needed to know and I wanted to tell you in person."

Elaine looked sad, "Baby, I am so sorry for your loss. Tim, your loss, too. Better or worse, he was your father after all."

"Elaine, ever since we escaped, I kind of put it out of my mind, you know, having a father. I mostly mourn for a lost childhood... a father that should have been, and never was. But Marcie, you were with him, so I'll offer my condolences to you. What took him, anyway?"

Marcie sighed, "I think you can guess... he was wound pretty tight. He had hypertension. He had high blood pressure. It went untreated for years. It destroyed his kidneys. It damaged his heart. He had strokes. He was just short of his 72nd birthday. Mom... Tim... he... he never got over it. I know he realized that everything was his fault. He knew he had driven you into each others arms and had driven you away. He did not forgive himself. He never had a relationship with another woman. I never saw him even try. And he let himself go. I lived about twenty minutes away but I couldn't force him to go to the doctor, so he just didn't."

"Well, kids, yes Tim, I'm talking to you, too, now... you didn't know the man I fell in love with. I did, I did love your father at one point. He treated me well. He was always full of himself but early on, when he was good-humoured, it was amusing. But as time wore on, I think the pressures of life weighed on him. And being full of himself did not translate well when he became ill-humoured. And I stayed for two reasons. I had kids, and he would occasionally show enough flashes of his old self to give me false hope. By the end, he didn't give me any hope at all. Tim, honey, you gave me hope. Marcie, your brother gave me hope when I thought all was lost. It was not a cheap affair. We were the real deal then, and we still are. Even if incest freaks you out, please consider that this is a sincere and genuine romance."

"Mommy, I can understand a mother and son loving each other, I can even understand lines getting blurred, given the right provocation, like what you two went through. But what are the mechanics of incest? How does it work? How does it even happen?"

"Marcie baby, it's much like any other two people falling in love in some respects. And in other respects it's very different. When I was young and single, I had a picture in my mind of how things would go. We see romance movies. We witness others dating. We never imagine the type of scenario that developed between Tim and myself. We don't fantasize as adolescent girls that we are going to be with the man of our dreams as a result of escaping abuse. So the things that put us together were unusual. The mother-son thing was certainly unusual. But once we get past the question of 'how did we get there,' the rest of it is pretty ordinary. Once we crossed the Rubicon, there was a romance. There was love and devotion. There was a sexual relationship. There was a child and now there is a family. In total, it has been a unique experience. I hope that gives you some idea of how things managed to happen between your brother and me. And I apologize for any discomfort the whole thing brings your way. But Tim and I never apologize for loving each other. We have been each other's everything."

"Mom, thank you. Thanks for giving me some insight. I'm happy that you're happy. You and Tim. I can see the dynamic between you. Just how you are with each other. You guys are clearly the real deal. I mean, after 26 years I can't say that this is just some weird fling now, can I? So, Adam, I know how you found out, but what do you think of the whole thing?"

"Yikes, Aunt Marcie, I have had seven years to process what they told me. And it's a mixed bag in my mind. My parents are still to me what they've always been. But every once in a while I think about it... shit, I'm... sorry Mom.. I'm still a bit amazed. The whole thing should be second nature to me by now, but I can still get self-conscious about it from time to time. And I'm still amused by the whole family-tree thing. But in terms of value judgement, I said it before... Mom and Dad conditioned me to always keep an open mind about love. I certainly don't advertise what's going on. I mean, their relationship isn't illegal in Rhode Island so nobody is going to jail, but I know that society is split on what is cool and what is beyond the pale. No two people agree but larger numbers of people are likely willing to overlook Mom and Dad's age difference than their family tree. More people accept same-sex romance than same-blood romance. In fact when it comes down to it, incest is low man on the totem pole. More people are more likely to accept multi-partner relationships or inter-racial relationships than same-family relationships. It's strange when you think about it... you'd think that people who dislike inter-ethnic or inter-racial relationships would be in favour of incest. I mean, if I'm sleeping with my Mom, for instance, that guarantees that I'm fishing in the same racial pond."