All Comments on 'A Bit of Fun Equals Shattered Lives'

Seems like a stretch but in these instances that's the fun with stories! I suppose one could argue that even stranger things have happened. I would have liked more detail about what really happened to Annette (and more detail overall). Having her suddenly show up in a park was sure off the wall.

To me this story described a credible set of outcomes from risky behavior. Not particularly erotic or even enjoyable to read, but credible.

Not worth the effort.

would have given you five if there was more detail and character building, the mother and daughters acted like complete sluts, why???the reaction of the husbands was reasonable and not over the top although so many questions could have been asked, again you have good talent and good imagination try longer stories. thanks for sharing

How did Annette die? Did Oscar have her killed, and none of the others suspected? Did she off herself in grief? Maybe you wanted to leave that as a mystery, but it just came out too fast and jumbled at the end and was too confusing. And who was the one that found the DVD in the first place, what was his involvement? The way you describe this going down, it just seemed liked there had to be alot more to the story. Instead of crafting a scene where these facts come out and are revealed, instead you glossed over alot and (at least for me) left me scratching my head.

These posters that pander to the BTB mob are the lowest form of prostitutes themselves. But they are far dumber than the typical whore on a street corner. This one is so stupid he rises to a comical putz. Still the sicko BTB will swarm in here and parise and adore him, which will make the comedy even funnier. A redeeming value, that.

A little dramatic, but I get the point. Stupid, selfish people making bad decisions.

At least two writing misstakes. Adam and Ken had sex after, not prior to the stag night. Next, a body is not partly decomposed after one week. It is a story, and must be judged as just that. But it was too far off for me to enjoy. **

Good cautionary tale... But ... British bachelorette party porn clips are pretty entertaining. As long as it's not your gal.

As others have commented, you rushed the end. Besides, I would have liked to hear what the wives thought about making their horrible choice. Also, if they were paid, where did they think the money came from other that porn dvd?

Sorry, no characters here that I felt anything about. Flat and uninteresting.

Not over the top at all. Husbands did nothing to make wives get std's, they did that on their own. Divorce is a natural consequence of what they did. Annette was just turning into a whore and they get beaten and killed all the time. Perfect story with natural consequences of adultery. 5

Another author with some production in other categories wading into the (dramatic) LW genre. Thanks for wading in. This was an okay read. S-Dez did a series with a similar premise called "After the Fact." It was a very different story. I can suspend disbelief for the right kind of story, but this betrayal by all the females in the family was too over the top, and I didn't believe the actions of the wronged men. Was the oblique reference to the unknown woman's demise a suggestion that the protag had her killed? That she took her own life? I didn't get it.

The writing itself was descent, though it was laborious at times. All the stuff about the complicated waiting game and postponements and testing and the rest diffused what emotional impact the story might have had.

Not realistic enough to be a slice of life tale, not emotional enough to be an effective dramatic piece, not the proper revenge to be a btb story, no fantasy ending for the protag so it isn't a fantasy moving-on story, not clear enough to really be a cautionary fable, not morally complicated enough to be a dilemma story, and no mystery/tension to be a cheating wife whodunit. Obviously, not a stroker story either.

So, I was left with the thought, "what's the point?"

The idea that they did rehearsals for the tape just about blows away any need to do testing on the men and to set up the divorces. The idea of the protagonist accepting Annette in the future is crazy!

they were stupid selfcented egocentri whores with no concern for themselves or the the people they were supposed to have loved. Shame Adam didnt realize he was better off not being surrounded by trash.

the point is - life is a bitch and if you are lucky you dont marry one.

Thanks for the read

Not as bad as the freak with the slaughter-and-rape the innocent festival going on in yesterday's story, but still... really? What kind of pathetic loser offers to take his wife back on the condition that she allows him to violate his marital oaths? Either divorce the slut or don't marry her, but for christ's sake, a man needs to keep his own honor even if his slut of a wife has none. "You can cheat on me if I can cheat on you, as long as you don't get an STD!"

Either have an open marriage or don't. Cut the half-way shit. Only a fool marries a slut even if she comes up clean of STDs.

What a downer.

Incredible betrayal. Fiction though it is, that this occurs in someones mind is preposterous.

ALL CHEATERS SHOULD DIE IN EXCRUTIATING PAIN

Yeah

The author pushes way beyond believability in too many areas and as a result creates an unrealistic tale that misses on all cylinders. Unless you count "see? I was right! Women can't be trusted!" as a theme.

Here's a comment section observation. I noticed that the wife-sharing and cheating wife fans didnt attack this story, the author, his fans, commenters or the theme. Do they just avoid stories they don't like? I mean, if the situation were reversed, and this were a nonsensical, unbelievable cheating wife story where the husband enjoys the wife's activity...

That last anoymous comment has me seriously worried for any women they know. What a disgusting view of women in general and life.

Get help.

It went from believable, passed crazy town and took off into left field heading for retarded. This was your idea? This was the best story you came up with and this is what beat all the other drek in your tiny head? If this was the best, I would hate to see what you passed on because this sucked asshole.

There was so much wrong with this that I don't know where to begin except that you don't need an editor, you need a hobby that doesn't involve writing.

The story needs an editor. The author went from first person to third person, then back to first. The story also lacks credibility. How could this fiancé ever be trusted again? Setting conditions (i.e., getting checked for STD's, being celibate for a year) and suggesting the marriage would still take place if she fulfilled those conditions seems ridiculous as she has already shown she does not behave herself the way a woman in a committed relationship should.

But there was so much wrong with this story that I can't begin to put it into words. I would say that you need an editor but the best editor could only marginally help this mess.

Remarkably bizarre perspective on women and families. Mama is willing to risk her children and future grandchildren for virtually zero benefit to herself or any of her progeny! Also, apparently willing to ignore religious/moral positions in which considerable family effort has been invested.

I am a firm believer that (most) men and (most) women have fundamentally different priorities and principles regarding relationships. Women, I think, focus on maximizing the quality of a future child and the development of current children. Husbands factor into (but do NOT necessarily determine) the former, and are expected to assist in the latter! Most men, I believe, consider their wives to be their principal partner and object of attention! In an emergency, if there is time to either save the spouse or an offspring (but not both!), I think Hubby and Sweetie will default differently.

This story takes the priority on sexual dedication held by men and by women to an apparently outlandish extreme. However, it also seems clear, from the comments, that there are a fair number who hold to that extreme! Scary shit!

I like to imagine a law where applicants for a marriage license MUST read this article and comment on it (at least three paragraphs) in writing and separately. They then read each other's comments and leave. If they BOTH show up the next day, the license will be printed and issued.

Total carnage from one night !

Was it worth it ! ?

Badly written, no real plot, motivation for the women is missing. A waste of time to read, and a waste of electrons to store in Literotica.

Take it down and dump it!!!

This was totally cut off from reality. So a mother and her daughters would have a bachelorette party where they have sex for the cameras and are paid for it, and are so stupid that they don't even think someone they know might see it? Even leaving out the odds that there is a mother who wants to watch her daughters have sex and vice/versa.....as they point out, this wasn't spur of the moment, if the bride to be got carried away and had sex with a male stripper, maybe, but to be part of a porn movie? Not to mention that no porn company would do this, they would never use something like a real bridal party in filming, for a lot of reasons, they would want experienced porn actors. The other reason is obvious, unless the women were tested, they wouldn't risk getting studs, they would just assume married women were clean.

On top of that, commercial porn movies follow a production code, and all their actors are tested for STD's quite regularly.

It started out very interesting and then took a turn toward the surreal. Very odd. Thanks for the offering.

Is also...

So they paid to watch a porn film, no, not animated but real women who got paid to do it. And the money that paid them came from where? Duh?

In these days where a Roman orgy is considered Soft core, why are we so shocked? As for Churchgoing people, they are some of the worst practitioners of this sort of thing. Again, why are we so shocked? As to the author, you anonymous fuckers ever heard of Poetic License? He can write whatever he wants, how ever he wants. If you don't like the style or the subject matter, go read something else. I believe in freedom of speech. to do it in your own way as you see fit. This shit has probably happen once or twice or even more, so why be shocked. You holier than thou fuckers need to get your heads out of your asses. Humans are the worst threat to Mother Earth, with their debauchery of one another, crimes against nature and greed. There will be a reckoning, may The Spirit help us.

I agree with you that anyone posting anonymously in these comments has nothing worthwhile to say.

But the fact is that freedom of speech doesn't mean people can't criticize this story. For example, I find it boring, not at all erotic, and not even remotely in the right category. Typical of the bitter, lonely old men and sad little MRA virgins who have hijacked Loving Wives, as is your comment.

I liked the story, This was one of the strangest Loving wife stories I have read. Odd but good. A story with a different point of view.

Even a pack of wolves has higher standard than this group. This story had no beginning or end, it just reported an incident without emotion or substance. There were no winners just calamity and mayhem. It wasn't pleasant or recreational and lacked humour. Additionally, the complicity of a mother and three sisters is just completely unimaginable. Although written well it had a total lack of plausibility. Thank you for your effort.

Even a pack of wolves has higher standard than this group. This story had no beginning or end, it just reported an incident without emotion or substance. There were no winners just calamity and mayhem. It wasn't pleasant or recreational and lacked humour. Additionally, the complicity of a mother and three sisters is just completely unimaginable. Although written well it had a total lack of plausibility. Thank you for your effort.

"Loving Wives" has always been an idiotic category heading. I think when the category was created the idea of consequences for characters within a "Loving wives" story was meant to be forbidden.

What a bunch of who-ers! Any guy reading stories about bachelorette/hen parties will have to make certain that if he intends to get married,his intended's celebration needs to be monitored closely! CUNTS!

What fucking idiocy. it reads like a fantasy tale. And he is a fucking wimpy idiot to just THINK to forgive her.

Don't waste your time, people.

love every word. Fuck you dear annony! You're the asshole of Lit!

hard to believe he was going to forgive her. whoever the idiot is that is insulting everyone because they post anonymous and they do also go away you fool.

The one character who seemed incongruous was dad. If he had no inkling of the games his wife was willing to play after all of these years then his reaction to the screening at the party would have been more like puking on the floor between his shoes.

Beyond that this is a very good and original plot, for me. The decomp. in the woods was an unexpected twist. Good work was done here.

Hi peoples! I know that it is fiction! But I want to put something on this site. Ask yourself do you know what your intended or wife does or who is fucking her at those so called bridal shower parties? Sobering thought what! !They do get into it? Anyway the story is Fantastic! 10 stars = 100 % Love you all! Bye. Greg.

this site should get rid of commenting anonymously. let the asshole bashers be known to everyone.

thanks to the writer for this story

and its a family affair. TK U MLJ LV NV

Wants to prevent anons commenting!!! Thinks everyone should no names of those choosing to comment! Good for him or is it her.

I HAVE DOUBTS THAT JUST8SREADING IS AUTHENTIC NAME. THAT PROFILE NAME IS EVERY BIT AS ANONYMOUS AS ANONYMOUS.

if ol just8 had used his full real name then he would be entitled to make the demand he did.

To us anons who like to respectfully comment on worth of story without hassle of logging in, his-her comment is laughable and ludicrous.

With preceding comment

Did one better, checked out ju8streading profile

Enlightening-he or she answer all indentifiers with either no answer or none

√&√

As to be ludicrous and cartoonish.

But, the obvious warning is spot on!

Not sure why people saying not believable. Sure it is. People plan crazy bachelor and bachelorrette parties. People think of it as one last time before they be faithful.

It can take over 6 months to a year for HIV testing.

Anyways good story I liked it. Hansbwl is wrong. Author means the 2 guys had sex with their wives before they left to the grooms stag party... hence the "prior". Aren't you a writer yourself? How do you not know that.

BTB going to ridiculous extremes'. The decomposition of the body is from the mind of a sicko . Hope the protagonist has a truly dreadful life . Nuff said !

The "relevance" of the story ended for me when he said he would still marry her if....

From that point on it was just sick!

Cheating WHORE wives being treated like the whores they are. Cucks and cheating WHORE wife Apologist are crying in their bedroom closets.

Live by the sword .... die by the sword!

Thus endeth the lesson!

Were these people supposed to be adults? All those idiots laying down the law to their wives displayed complete ignorance of the legal realities. I hate cheaters but these women would have had a field day in the courts. Just simple-minded and naive.

..stupid! He was still going to marry annette, and adam was going to stay with his wife and he and oscar were going to have sex 25 times for revenge? The only sex those two wimpy losers were going to have is with their hand. 1 star

You had a good initial premise; the way too licentious bridal party, but you went off the rails almost right away.

Here's where you dropped the ball. First bad choice, no mother would have participated in anything like that. Second bad choice, the very thought that Oscar would buy in to a marriage after that discovery was idiotic. He would have attended the confrontation, but he would have cleared out afterward. Third terrible choice, all three of the daughters ended up completely ruined, no way.

Here's something you could have tried. Oscar's chosen was the youngest sister. She'd been corrupted by her older siblings. She begged, pleaded, and entreated Oscar to let her redeem herself. He considers it, but insists on a prolonged trial period to see of she was really worth it.

Why would Oscar even entertain the idea of still marrying Annette. That doesn't.make any sense at all. Bunch of slits in that family.

I don't understand him even considering marrying Annette. That really made no sense. You've got you facts about testing for STD's messed up. And since Annette doesn't seem to have much of a moral compass it was easy to see why she shrugged her shoulders the second time. Go through another course of medications and maybe use a condom or three the next time. Why would she kill herself or why would anyone kill her? She's not married. She caught an STD. Move on. This whole story was doom and gloom. A lot too dark for my tastes.

1 star

????

The poor animals. Eating a diseased corpse. The Bear Is stunned. Hopefully none of my wild cousins partook of the feast.

The BEAR

It became compete shit at this point ""Adam, you know I might be willing to overlook this. After all, many men have a stripper or two at their bachelor parties and most of the time there's sexual contact. But in today's world it's a scary thing to know that Annette had sex with several men and none wore protection! I'd be willing to go on the wedding but only after Annette gets checked for possible STDs and is cleared. I realize this is difficult to say, but you should have Rose tested and tell Joe and Kenneth to have their wives tested as well."

And after that it got better, as in worse, way worse. At no point would anyone have assumed the above paragraph was one of the better parts of this hot mess.

Wierd shit.

Awful. Poorly written, robotic dialogue, stupidly over the top premise of the story. A bachelorette party where the bride gets crazy drunk and is pushed into some sort of sexual conduct (jerking off, the stripper, sucking his cock, etc) is the sort of thing that can at least form the basis for a story that could go in many directions. But this "story" is absurd. Normal women don't get fucked by dozens of men in some giant gang bang at a bachelorette party. And if that ever did happen, no man would consider forgiving the slut and getting married to her. J

tldr: horrible waste of time

1 star - waste of time - don't bother reading this awful story.

Damn, I have a hard time to imagine why 16 grown adult men would sit together in a hotelroom watching porn together for 3 hours. Whats wrong with those guys?

I agree with the others, this went way off the rails toward the end with ex girlfriends committing suicide and others attempting more suicide. Just too much.

I know it was for the story, But there is NO way any of them would even consider staying married, STD or not.

A bit far-fetched. I could see bringing home an STD as a good way to end up with at least one divorce (with or without the video) but killing off the characters is a bit over the top. (And, before you mention HIV/AIDS, do keep in mind that those patients are taking an extremely long time to die with a lifetime dependent on modern prescription medicine. It was an easy way to kill off a character with promiscuity and drug abuse from 1982-1995, but today?)

Odd that no one mentioned birth control. Even more odd is that no one mentioned the manufacturer or producer of the video being sued for operating what is basically an unsafe workplace. A proper standard of care is that a porn shoot test its talent for every STD imaginable. Anything less is actionable negligence - much like a construction site refusing to provide its workers with hardhats and protective gear would be in a heap of legal trouble the moment anyone gets hurt.

If the production exposed this bachelorette party to multiple diseases, they're exposing others too. The lawyers would be having a field day as the damage would extend far beyond the six patients directly mentioned here.

Look up "Lara Roxx" in the encyclopaedia and you'll get an idea of how far one STD can spread quickly in porn.

That the dumbshit even hinted at still wanting to marry the whore made me sick.

It shouldn't be hard at all to track down the others involved in making the films...just claim to be women interested in their next production. Why no consequences for them?

Poorly written, completely stupid premise. Yes, there are sadly too many stories of bachelorette parties where the bride-to-be and/or other attendees get carried away and have sex with a male stripper. But this presentation of a massive orgy is just dumb. If such an unlikely event occurred, why would a prospective husband even consider for an instant marrying his slut fiancee? The story is also very poorly written. 1*

not keen on the fiancee's end. too violent and didn't make sense unless the character was really mentally unstable and distraught, which I didn't get from her "big deal" reaction. unless there was foul play involved, didn't see that either as the fiance was fairly forgiving.

All of the horseshit about getting past it is ridiculous. The result would be immediate divorce and permanent cancelation of the wedding. Just ridiculous.

Good grief this would end in 4 divorces. Quick ones. No getting over it. Women did deserve to die...

This pathetic little story has so many holes in it, it makes Swiss cheese look solid. My biggest problem is that the male strippers will have been tested way before being able to strip at any party, so no diseases could be passed on. Incubation period on some disease are at least 1 week plus the health board will have been notified so ALL infected people will be notified... What caused Annette to die in the main "city park", her partly decomposed body, after only a week??? Watch "Bones" or "CSI" to catch my drift. So many more discrepancies, but it is just a work of fiction. Unlikable storyline with awfully bad characters... Not sorry - 2 stars

To the comment about the strippers being tested… pretty sure the whole point was that it was a very seedy operation that paid the women to put out. So idk why you went so deep about this

I may have missed an important detail somewhere along the way but I can't for the life of me understand why the MC was still considering going ahead with the wedding after the big reveal and what happened to make him do a 180 on that decision so abruptly. The dead body in the park was a loose end that needed tying up. Not very impressed, I'm afraid.

JR

Is this a re-post? I’ve read this before.

My bad just saw the position date, senility it comes to us all. lol

Just an awful story, waste of time to read it

Even if she didn't have the party, there's the possibility of her doing those acts at her sisters' party, so the behavior was likely there, but seems like she didn't care, but I can only assume she fell in with the wrong man that got her killed.

Stupid.

Pretty ordinary.