All Comments on 'A Chance for Redemption'

and he's driving a Chevy or Dodge?!!?!?!?? What kind of "angel" is Barry _really?_

{end snark}

A good story.

Reminds me of "It's A Wonderful Life!!

Just brilliant. Thank you.

Thanks very much for this story of second chances. Perhaps it will help some of us readers take our decisions more seriously.

Fine story worth the read. If only... What would we not change! Thank you

Well done

Brilliant!!

great story, well told

What a fantastic story. I am a 64 year old man crying while reading it.

Definitely 5*. Thank you for your work.

What a unique twist to a romance story! I'm happy and sad that it is over. Thank you for writing such a lovely story and sharing it with us.

A great message. Thank you so much! A great lesson. Thank you for the insight! This story came to me just when I needed it.

Too bad we don't get a 're-do' in real life. Usually it's more of a correction after screwing up. Enjoyed the story and was happy that Derek finally made the right decisions. Not sure that I've ever heard a 5 or 6 year old child call their father "Dad". Usually it's Daddy until they reach a certain point in their lives. Still an interesting story, but I did kept thinking of Ebenezer Scrooge and his second chance at setting things right, lol. Worth five stars, thanks.

You ought to up it to 70 or something

Loved it. Makes one think back and hope for a better future. You may not be able to fix past mistakes, but you can learn from them to have a better future. Thank you!

nice sci-fi fantasy story. re one comment; a human body hitting a solid object with a speed of 25 miles (40kms) an hour can be lethal...

Five stars, even with some little grammar errors!

Loved your story but no Ford man is going to be driving a Chevrolet. If he is Barry needs to come back and fix that!! 😆

Wow is all I can say. Great story.

Good story!

5

Superb. Excellent. Loved it.

WOW what a fantastic story! I expect to see this as a Hallmark movie — without the love-making! Thank You for sharing such a wonderful story!

Great story. Thanks for sharing it.

...to say:

Beautiful.

Congratulations for a truly beautiful piece. Hats off.

-P.A.

What I know now. A fine read and worth my while.

Wonderful story, five stars even though he's a Ford man wrecking a Caravan? That would never happen.

This story hit me hard. There are many things I wish I could change, but I have two sons that I wouldn't risk giving up for the world. Great read. Thanks.

Or is someone peeling onions in here? Great read! 5*

And I do love this one. Don’t buy a Caravan being better for frontal impact but maybe it had better airbags. That’s my worst criticism. Also glad the Camaro didn’t get smashed. Great story!

Wonderful Story

I love stories involving changing how someone life is improved by heavenly intervention. Like A Christmas Carol. Superbly written.

Ad Anon says reminds me if "It's A Wonderful Life" although it's really the opposite image and he gets to put right what he did wrong. Great writing and thoroughly enjoyable.

5 stars.

One of the best short stories I've read so far. Not a good erotica but an excellent romantic story. Maybe you should post it to some other place too. It's really great.

Very enjoyable. Wouldn’t it be great to be able to redo your worst decisions. I don’t think 5 would be enough for me! The only flaw I can think of is that he has no memories of his new life. How can he do his new job when his only knowledge is from one midterm in his freshman year? How can he reminisce with his family and friends when he has no memories of their time together? He’d have friends whose names he doesn’t know, he doesn’t know his own address, his works address, etc. Would have worked better if every time he came back from a do over he was flooded with memories of what happened after. But regardless an enjoyable, heartwarming story.

Enjoyed the whole time reading keep Kleenex box close .

Definitely top 5 story ive read on here

I agree with Rallen86, he would need his new memories. But that is only a minor point in a great story, 5 stars. It's a Wonderful Life indeed.

Accepting his son with monogamous relation is no big deal.

In my view, in the re-do, he should have allowed Nicole to go to France by reposting full faith on her, while he completing his credits by staying back.

A French on face book may also remain. Nicole can come back from France. The Frenchie can alsi be seen at local bar with Nicole meeting him socially and telling him.

Then Nicole declaring pregnancy would create doubt in his mind in the 5th moment. And then he should put faith in Nicole that she won't cheat on him.

That would have made not just Berry but even God proud of him.

Great story and wouldve ruined it if Nicole left for France without him. It would show that a semester in France at the risk of their relationship was worth it, just like it was in the original timeline. Barry and God would smile knowing Derek chose the right path, he was selfless enough to basically lose a semester and Nicole loved him enough to not risk their relationship by leaving without him.

5 Stars

Really great story. Not what I expected when I started reading it but the more I read the more I wanted to read.

5 Stars!!

Well done! Excellent ripple effect storyline.

What a heartwarming, lovely story! You really have a talent for making me feel for your characters! 5 stars for sure!

What a great story, I've read all of your romance stories and this one moved me the most. Well done!

Words would do an injustice to your work. I cheered, I cried, I felt joy. A true work of literature art. Thank you

A near death experience can certainly give you new perspective. The drunk driver made sure of that. Unfortunately the woman I loved was with me, and didn't survive. I've wondered what our life would have been like for over 40 years. Too bad Barry hasn't stopped by.

On the other hand, my life has been full and mostly happy. There are certainly things that I'd do differently, given what I know now. But you do the best you can at any given moment. Tomorrow is promised to no one. Keep that in mind.

Thank you and Merry Christmas!

A true fantasy. If only.

Really nice story. It's almost a movie script. Well done!

Great story

A great way to redo the essence of “A Wonderful Life”, kind of in reverse, but the sentiment is there. Astounding how minor decisions can change a life’s course dramatically, I loved it!

What a great story, very reminiscent

of “A Wonderful Life”, as Purplefizz

previously commented; I wonder how

many of us would react if faced with

the same choices...

Well done, CJ, it was a pleasure to read.

I really like what if fiction and this was one of the best. Great story, real characters and happy ending what’s not too like?

A minor thing. People who work at Ford generally drive Ford products.

> Caravan and not the Camaro

Neither of those vehicles are Ford nameplates.

Wow. I wasn’t sure about this story when I first started it, but WOW! This was an amazing read. Thank you for this wonderful story!

Wrong category! This is a fantasy!

FANTASTIC!! One of my top 5. !) stars because they should change their system, but they won't. The Bear definitely approves. This is a true Loving Wives story, but it's in Romance. I'll take it. Keep writing, and I'll have to check up on you ....occasionally. Don't worry about the Camaro- one less Chevy piece of junk in the world. And I think Caravan is a Dodge?? If had been in an old-line Bronco, or an F-250 4x4, he would have walked away with just a couple of scratches. (heh, heh,heh) But then wouldn't have been a neat story. He also could find Frenchie and beat the snot out of him. Oh well, we'll work on that.

The Bear

The BEAR

Amazing story!

What a gem!

What an amazing story, this storyline is really different for something you would normally find on Literotica. It was not only moving but inspirational and the message was loud and clear, doing the right thing, making the right decisions at points in your life can affect your whole future with immense results. Story was well written with great character interaction. Well done 5++STARS.

I had a hard time reading this through the tears after the scene with Derek's dad! Beautiful, well done.

Great story! Fuck you for making me cry like a baby. Still, a great story!

Feels a lot like "It's a wonderful life"... to bad that Derek didn't receive the memories of his altered lifeline....

I like the story idea very much, with being able to "do it over" or to have a "what if." You paint poignant scenes with Derek's dad; a realistic counterpoint to him studying (vs loafing)--not unlike "Pleasantville"; he approaches Nicole earlier and strengthens their relationship; he even takes the plunge to go to France with her, and I can't say him meeting Nathan was unrealistic: in fact, you draw most of this very well, pen plausible dialogue and craft realistic emotions.

The point I diverge is with "Barry," who gives him too much guidance and makes it a little too easy to make the right choice, making the ending a foregone conclusion--it's just too convenient--and it would have been more realistic had Barry simply presented him with the 5 spots but left it totally up to him on how he decided to remedy them (if at all). Additionally, we only see photographic evidence of their times in France, but no verbal evidence of the same.

Very well-written story, excepting the extraordinary convenience Barry provided, and no "French" that really spiced up their life. I mean they could have had all kinds of stories to tell, from just going to the supermarket and speaking in French on purpose to confuse other customers, or something of the sort. 4

second time around think I enjoyed it more now than when I read it the first time solid five

Excellent, beautiful story! Loved it. 5 BIG & FAT BLAZING NOVA STARS!

Absolutely ridiculous...totally unrealistic, never could happen.

And you had me at the first paragraph and kept me enthralled to the final sentence. Nice job!

Great story Ebenezer.

I think we all have our own "5 moments". I know I do.

However, every day is a new chance. Change is hard. But often worth it.

I can't go back and change those moments in my past. But given how my life is now, I don't know that I'd want to.

Great story.

A good well written story, I agree with No1-OfConsequence below, we all can probably think of our own "5 Moments", I was thinking of mine as I read the story.

Great story, although it saddened me to think of my own poor decisions or in some cases indecision. Would that we could all have a do-over like this.

Wow... Just, wow. Thank you.

Great story. I loved it.

What a wonderful story. Very well written, thought-provoking, and emotional. After reading this story, I can think of some decisions I made in the past, I have come to regret and wonder what life would have been like if I had made better choices. Thank you for the time and effort you made writing this story.

I write this comment with tears in my eyes. The ability to evoke such emotions with words is a gift. Thank you for sharing that gift.

Don Romine

Wow. Amazing. Thank you!

wow this made me cry multiple times

Dear Author,

I gave 5*.

The plot, as you well know, is not very original, but your execution…

A strong, emotional story: I hope you are proud of it. If not, you should.

Thank you for the story.

After reading bent, not broken, I came here for similar kind of story. But,

MY GOD, what a story.

Loved it.

The most amazing story I've read in Literotica or otherwise. You are a gem of a writer with the capacity to get your readers emotional with just your words. The part where Derek meets his dying father was beautiful and sad. I read that part maybe 20 times with a lump in my throat. At the end, without realising, I found tears rolling down my cheeks. It reminded me of my father. He was a great Dad and my mum was good too. They loved each other. But, like most married people, sometimes they quarreled; and every time they did so, I took the side of my mother without thinking. My Dad loved me and was sad that I always took my mum's side. One day he told me, "Son, one day, when I am no more, you will understand." A few years later, he was in Houston on business and he died of a sudden heart-attack. I loved him, but I never got to tell him that. Today I understand that there was nothing serious in their quarrels. He loved my mother deeply, it was only lover's tiffs. I should not have taken sides.

Also Derek's meeting with his son in the last part of the story was beautiful. He was in a position to undo all the mistakes that he had done to his father. And finally he did it. There's nothing as beautiful as hearing your child say, "Dad I love you." I would have given you 100 if I could. Please keep writing such masterpieces.

Certainly makes you think back about your life and the decisions you've made. Wonderful story. Thank you. 5* of course!