A Diamond and a Club

"Have you ever been to Charles Diamond's house?"

"Yes, twice."

"Could you tell us when and why?"

"No."

They looked at each other.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't know why you're asking. I'm stressed out. My wife is unconscious, and her family are on their way. I believe the expression is 'a lot on my plate'. And you're burbling away about some bloke I barely know. What happened to her?"

"You must understand..."

"No, I don't understand. Here's the deal. You tell me everything you know, and I'll tell you everything I know. And if that means I have to be putin a cell for the night, do it. My day can't get much worse."

They looked at each other, and he nodded.

"A 999 call was received by the ambulance service this evening. Medical assistance was requested at the residence of Charles Diamond. We attended, and had to break down the front door to gain access. He was found in his bedroom. The medics kept us out at first, so I do not have details of his injuries, though I understand he was unconscious. Tabitha Poulter was in the same bedroom; n near the bedside table, still holding the phone."

"What were they wearing?"

"I..."

"Come on, you know damn well what this looks like. What were they wearing?"

He glanced at the DC and she replied.

"They were both naked Mr Poulter."

I looked suitably serious.

"Did they have anything to say for themselves?"

"Mr Diamond has remained unconscious throughout. The nurses reported your wife spoke briefly about seeing a black man in the room. But there was no sign of forced entry.

"Thank you. I appreciate you're not trained give me an opinion on their injuries. Tell me what you think, and I'll reveal all."

"Your wife has injuries to her head. All I know of Mr Diamond's condition is it's worse than your wife's. The motive may well have been robbery."

I waited a moment to digest this 'new' information.

"My wife works at Wade's, with Diamond. She and I went to a barbecue at his house last Saturday; I noticed some subtle flirting. Later, I realised I'd left my reading glasses there, and went back to retrieve them last night. Diamond and I had a beer and I stayed about thirty minutes."

"Those were the only occasions?"

"Yes."

They made notes. I thought it was clever, not using his first name. I was the wronged party after all.

"Obviously this looks like she was having an affair with him." I continued. "I had no idea, apart from seeing some harmless flirting. My wife knew I was off work today, and said she'd be home a little late. She was working on some project with Diamond. Now I know what it was!"

We went round the houses a few more times, and wound down. They stood.

"I must ask you not to leave the area, until our investigations are complete."

"You have colleagues in Bristol, no doubt. I'm moving there this weekend. I start a new job on Monday. I can give you the new address."

"That will be fine. Please contact our Market Road station before you leave. A message will do if we're not around."

Chapter 7

There was not a lot to do at work. Just bringing my tasks to a close, and clearing out my personal stuff. By Friday, I was all packed up at home, except my washing stuff and a towel. My boss had given me the afternoon off. In Bristol, Carl had organised a junior, with the key, to wait for the removal men at my new address. I knew there would be some lunchtime drinking on my last day, so some of Charles' cash got me a cheap hotel nearby.

The removal men had loaded my belongings, including the bed, and driven off before I took a taxi to work. The house felt cold. Empty ones usually do. Tabby's parents arrived to take away all her clothes and personal stuff.

"Is this really necessary?" asked her mum. "Can't you two work this out?"

I ignored her and looked at Tabby's father.

"If your wife sneaked off to another man's house to have sex with him, would you try and work things out Dave?"

"Well really! There's no call for vulgarity!" said her mum.

"Exactly what I'll be telling Tabby. Just get her crap out of here, and don't visit the hospital till after I've been."

The phone rang. Tabby was coming round.

When I arrived, the same two officers were there.

"Would you like an update, before your visit, Mr Poulter?"

"Good idea. I'm in no big rush to see her."

"Mrs Poulter's fingerprints were found on the golf club which injured Mr Diamond. He's still unconscious by the way. She remains confused about things, but insists she does not remember touching it. And she still thinks someone else was in the room, despite our evidence to the contrary. Our first explanation was that he attacked her and she hit him in self defence, and then passed out. But it doesn't fit. In fact nothing does. To be honest, a third person would explain the scene we found. But, the only way that works, is if someone was already in Mr Diamond's house, when they got there."

"And that would make me a good candidate if I was able to get in. But I didn't know they were having an affair till you more or less told me. Also, I don't have much of an alibi."

DC Burton was about to say something, but she stopped herself. I think I know what it was. 'Most innocent people don't have good alibis.'

"Look, I'm moving to Bristol today. Can you confirm that's ok? I don't want to hamper your investigation but this new job is important."

"Yes, go ahead. We have your new address. But we may want to speak to you again."

Chapter 8

Eventually, I got in to see Tabby. She was pretty groggy.

"So, what have you been getting up to?"

She hung her head.

"How much do you know?"

"Oh no; we're not playing that game. It gives you too much scope to tell more lies."

"I've been telling lies?"

"'I would never cheat on you' is right up there. I know you have. That counts as a lie in my book. Assume I know everything, and tell me the truth. All of it."

She sighed in defeat.

"I've been having an affair with Charles. Do you know how he is? They won't tell me."

"Later. Why did you have the affair?"

"I don't know; he fascinated me."

"And what happened before you called an ambulance?"

"I'm not sure exactly. We were just about to have sex, and suddenly I heard him fall, maybe pushed, off me. I fell, or was thrown, down next to him."

"Why are you so unsure?"

"I hit my head on a handle on the chest of drawers. When I came round I crawled to the bedside phone and called for help; then passed out again. But I'm sure there was a black man in the room; he hit Charles, then me. Though the police tell me there was no-one. Do you know any more?"

"Yes. I know a great deal."

"Please tell me. I'm so confused."

"First you tell me something. And you either tell the truth, or I'll leave."

"I will."

"Did you buy a mobile phone?"

"Yes and no. Charles bought one for me."

"To communicate during your affair?"

"Yes."

"All right, I'll tell you what I know. But you're still groggy, so pay attention."

"OK."

"I knew you were having an affair because I'd phoned Ed, and he'd transferred calls from his office to his mobile. I noticed that when it started to ring; there was a pause and then the tone changed. When I called you from my Bristol trip, I heard it again. So I suspected you'd got a mobile and done the same thing. The only reason I could think, why you would transfer from the house phone, was if you were not at home like you said. Then I noticed the cushions around our pillows. And, lo and behold, Diamond has the same thing on his bed. Conclusion? That's where you got the idea. How am I doing so far?"

She nodded sadly.

"When he burnt his hand, and that woman took him inside, you took over chef duties. We don't have a barbecue, but you took to it like a duck to water. You were flipping burgers like a pro. And when you first stepped into the breach, you reached for the spatula without looking. You've had barbecues in his garden before, haven't you?"

A few tears started.

"And you took Pinot Grigio to that cook-out. First time we've ever bought that. Not the first time you'd drunk it though, was it?"

"No."

"Diamond has got a cupboard full of it. I checked."

"You're very clever."

"I'm cleverer than you obviously. But the best part was the joke tarantula your side of the bed."

"What did that prove?"

"Everything. You thought I put in the bed while you were brushing your teeth. But actually I put it in there, the previous morning before I left for Coventry."

"What?"

"I called you, heard the ringtone change, and said 'I hope you're tucked up in bed alone' and you laughed. But you couldn't have been; there was a spider in it. So you had to be in someone else's bed. Diamond's for instance."

She just sat there, tears running down her cheeks. Finally, the moment I was off to York, you were round there again. Soon after arriving, you were on your hands and knees for doggy style sex; appropriate for a bitch. What a pity he injured himself just before he got to fuck you."

"Wait a moment!"

She struggled to sit upright.

"You can't possibly know details like that. You were in his bedroom weren't you? You were the man in black! I'm going to tell the police!"

"Go ahead. The police report says the position of the fancy cushions suggested you were kneeling; hence doggy style. Your hospital treatment revealed sexual activity, ie foreplay, had started. They also confirm he didn't penetrate you; not that day anyway."

She slumped.

"No evidence of anyone else in that house. I agree, the police are having difficulty putting together a scenario that makes sense. But you were about to get fucked, and ended up falling against the bedroom furniture. And lover boy was injured in the head and balls, apparently with his own golf club. Assault - who struck first? Was it you? It certainly couldn't have been me; I'd have killed you both."

She glared at me; confused but suspicious.

"Diamond is still in a critical condition, and your fingerprints are on the weapon. So, go ahead and tell the cops you think it was me. They already think you're crazy."

Tabby started crying louder.

"Last part of what I know then. Our house is empty. Your stuff is round your mother's. When you see her next, do not be vulgar, she doesn't like it!"

Tabby looked even more confused.

"I've handed the key back to the landlord, so don't go back there. If you do, you'll be adding trespass to your other sins. And I've got a new job and new address; you don't need to know where."

"What?"

"You heard. Life moved on while you were offering yourself to handsome Mr Diamond. Be warned though, I called your office yesterday; they'd only heard you were both injured. I told them what you'd been up to, and I think they cancelled the whip-round for flowers. I'll be surprised if you've still got a job when you get out of here. And I'll be surprised if Diamond ever gets out of there, to be honest, he's more or less a vegetable. Suits him."

"You bastard!"

"That's rich, coming from you. If you struggle to find a job when you're discharged, you could always buy some more stockings and hang around the train station after nine o'clock. The neck brace might put off a few punters, but your cunt should still be working ok."

I walked out feeling smug. The drive to Bristol was pleasant. Tabby would find out where I was eventually, but hopefully wouldn't bother to try and contact me. I just hoped she wouldn't contact Frank. How did I get back from York so quickly? And we don't even have a branch there.