All Comments on 'A Family Twist'

Fun idea. I like it but there should be rather more description.

Just so you know, I couldn't make it half-way through the first page. Better luck next time.

Started out pretty good. But then you went to the cam show trope and ruined it. It could have been a really good brother and sister in love with each other story.

I liked it in general. It did skim a lot of story and a bit simplistic but it also doesn't need to be war and peace. Hoping for another chapter with some more story, how did the sister and step mom start up? Obviously it had been going on a while. How long did step mom know about the twins? Etc etc.

Good story line, and plot.

HOWEVER, before posting a story, let it rest for a couple of days. Then read it and correct the errors.

Quit changing tense. If you want past tense, the entire scene must remain in past tense. If in the present, STAY in the present.

Learn the difference between your and you're, of and off, et cetera.

Each of these mistakes breaks the reading continuity, combined, it approaches unreadability.

This was shit.

nice

Stupid brother and trailer park trash story