A Hard Lesson

This is a work of almost pure fiction. Names, dates, characters, events and incidents are the products of the author's imagination such as it is. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead or actual events is purely coincidental.

Now you're all anticipating poor characterisation and a dubious plot. Arguably it does include an inappropriate teacher-pupil relationship I'll grant you that. In fact that's pretty much the entire plot. And to be frank it might be said that the sub-plot climaxes with an inappropriate teacher-pupil dynamic too.

In my defence I can state with confidence that all of the characters were well over the legal age of sexual consent in the UK at the time. In fact, they were all 18+. The setting is somewhere in the UK which does still exist. To be precise a classroom in Hallucinogenic High School which doesn't.

Try finding Hallucinogenic High School anywhere in the UK. Use any search engine you like. You can't find it can you? As I said 'This is a work of almost pure fiction'. Now do you believe me?

Hallucinogenic High School? You may feel apprehensive. Will this work include the misuse of non-prescription drugs? Final warning then. The misuse of non-prescription drugs will be implied.

It's Tuesday April 1st 1980 and the Upper 6th are waiting patiently for their teacher. Hallucinogenic High is situated in an inner city area and her pupils are a product of their environment. 6UA are a disparate group about 40% English with the rest made up of children who originated from the former empire; some first, some second generation and May whose parents came from Ireland's West coast.

Most of them took their studies seriously and all of them had managed to accumulate the qualifications necessary to push on for a free university place.

Their teacher had a passion for education too. Indeed she was an extremely passionate woman generally. She entered the classroom wearing need I say a shortish skirt, high heels and a low cut blouse. Of course she's gorgeous, lissom of limb and bountiful in the Bristol City area.

(That is not to say that Hallucinogenic High School is situated in Bristol. It's mythical, remember? Bristol and West was a commercial bank in the UK and it remains the Cockney rhyming term for chest. The classic rhyming slang is actually Bristol Cities meaning titties. If a Cockney (i.e. a person born within the sound of Bow Bells) were to exclaim. "Get a load of 'er Bristols!" he or she would be expressing admiration for a lady's chest.)

The owner of the bountiful Bristols one Miss Burstyn was a popular teacher and as such had been bestowed with several affectionate nicknames. During the spring of 1980 as the weather improved and her attire became skimpier Bra' Burstyn, Busty Burstyn and Burstyn at the seams increased in popularity.

In the future her ex-pupils would come to realise that these secretive sobriquets were far from complimentary and several would undertake gender awareness training. But those are different stories. For now we have to accept that Miss Burstyn was objectified. She addressed the class.

"Good morning 6UA. Apologies for the change of venue. I'm glad you all managed to find your way to the music room. Rest assured we'll be back in our regular classroom as soon as it's fully fumigated and passed fit for human habitation."

One of the girls asked.

May: (Her name was May Glove.) Is it safe in this room Miss?"

Miss Burstyn: (Henceforth just Miss because generally female teachers in the UK are referred to as Miss.) "Yes."

May: "But how can you be sure?"

Miss: "Because this is the music room and tunes help you breathe more easily."

May: "That's very re-assuring Miss."

Miss: "Good. Now has everybody brought back their consent form to confirm that you're allowed to attend this Sex Education lesson?"

Class: "Yes Miss!"

May: "And you've all brought in the original version of your birth certificates, not a copy to prove that you're over 18?"

Class: "Yes Miss!"

Miss: "Very good. So now I'm going to come to each desk to check."

Miss Burstyn scrutinised each document and when she was fully satisfied that each and every one of them was over 18 she returned to her own desk.

May: "That's excellent. All of your paperwork is in order. We can't be too careful you know. Now open your text books at page 1!"

But the class chorused back.

Class: "We haven't been given a text book Miss."

Miss: That's very strange I left one on every desk before I went to the staffroom for a spliff. I mean low tar cigarette."

Class: "The books weren't there when we got in Miss."

Miss: "Well, that's unfortunate. They contain some highly sensitive material."

May asked.

May:"Really Miss. What kind of highly sensitive material?"

Miss: "Pictures of a man and woman with no clothes on. After all this is supposed to be your Sex Education lesson. Plus extensive instructions on how to do it."

May: "We can't leave school without extensive instructions on how to do it Miss."

Miss: "Yes it's an essential component of the curriculum."

May: "And so is viewing pictures of men and women with no clothes on."

Miss: "That's true. Unusual, but in this context true. So first I'll need a girl to volunteer to act as a guinea pig."

May: "Girls aren't allowed to volunteer to act as guinea pigs or indeed any other type of rodent Miss."

A boy, George (That's a boy called George, not Boy George) added.

George: "Not unless it's a drama class."

Miss: "That's very awkward. I really need a naked female so I can give instructions on anatomy. Plus how to do it."

George: "Why don't you performed a striptease and demonstrate how to do it using your own body Miss?"

Miss: "Do you really think I'd be able to strip and perform the demonstration at the same time Michaels?"

(Teachers at the time referred to their male pupils by their surname. George who was not Boy George was George Michaels. That's Michaels with an 'S'.)

George: "You're a very versatile teacher Miss and we're in the music room. But maybe if you just took your clothes off normally it would be easier."

Miss: "Alright then. I'll try to do it myself. You'll have to bear with me while I unbutton my blouse."

The class muttered excitedly as Miss Burstyn turned to face the blackboard and took her top off.

Miss: Now I'm going to remove my brassiere."

She unclasped it and placed it with her blouse on the desk before cupping her breasts and facing her pupils.

Miss: "Alright. This is one for the boys. What are these for?"

There was a collective moan from the class as she let go of her breasts. Michaels was the first to compose himself. After all he was in the music room and though he didn't know it yet he had a music related name.

George: "That's easy Miss. They're funbags for your boyfriends to play with."

Miss: "Actually that's not entirely correct. I'm married so they're only there for my husband to play with..."

(Look, what I said about female teachers in the UK being referred to as Miss is true. Miss Burstyn will still be referred to as Miss by her pupils even though they now know she's a Mrs. What can I say? Male teachers in the UK are called Sir even though hardly any are knights of the realm.) Anyway she continued...

Miss (Not Mrs.): "Anything else? What do you think girls?"

May: "Some women also use them to feed their babies."

Miss: "Yes. Their primary function is in fact to produce milk for nutrition of the baby and infant."

One of the girls, a pretty blonde called June looked astonished. Miss Burstyn who was an observant as well as very versatile teacher noticed.

Miss: "Miss Buggy you look astonished."

(Alright, that is a cock up by me. I'll give you this one. Miss Burstyn would probably refer to her by her Christian name but I thought of a really funny play on words so I had her call June by the surname I made up. I assure you it won't happen again.)

June: "Yes Miss. What if you have triplets?"

Miss: "I wouldn't worry about that at the moment. We're talking sex now and the breast's capacity to act as a visual and tactile stimulus for the male organ. More of which we'll come to later."

One of the pupils put his hand up.

Miss: "Yes Farquhar."

Mortimer: (Ha! I bet you thought I couldn't resist making up a stupid name like Iwanna for Farquhar.) "I was just wondering if they're all like yours."

Miss: "They're all like mine but tend to vary in size. Most are much smaller. The average breast size is 34C. In case you're wondering mine are 32FF so excellent for display purposes. FF stands for?"

Gerry: "Fan Fuckingtastic Miss."

Miss: "Exactly Jones. Two house points."

She then tweaked both her engorged teat.

Miss: "And for another two house points, one for each. What are these called?"

Gerry: "Nipples Miss."

Miss: "Correct again Jones."

Gerry: "Yours are very prominent Miss. You could hang things on them."

Miss: "Yes, you're right there too. Sometimes they've been described as heavy hangers though I believe that was the package as a whole. But my nipples are very prominent. They could have been made for this type of demonstration."

Mortimer: "Or feeding."

Miss: "Yes. I should mention that the nipple is a raised region of tissue on the surface of the breast from which lactating ladies produce milk which can leave the breast through ducts to feed an infant. Does anyone know the term for the area surrounding the nipple?"

Gerry: "Areola Miss."

Miss: "Correct yet again Jones. The areola is often a darker colour than the surrounding skin. And in my case much more so and pleasantly plump. Therefore like my double Fs and nipples they're also ideal for display purposes."

A student sitting in the back corner raised his hand.

Miss: "Yes Jerome."

Julian: "You said earlier that your breasts provided a visual stimulus for the male organ."

Miss: "Yes. Has anyone noticed this happening yet?"

Julian: "Indeed Miss. I have!"

Miss: "I thought it might not be just your hand that was raised. Put it down and approach the front."

Julian Jerome slowly stood and then made his way awkwardly to Miss Burstyn's desk.

Miss: "Now unzip yourself and show us."

Julian did as he was told and faced his classmates.

Miss: "Thank you Jerome. Yours is a good example of the engorged penis. Definitely a really firm erection. In this state it should be possible for you to penetrate my vagina. As such your organ would be capable of conveying seminal fluid and the sperm in it into my womb. It's about six inches long and so thick that I can only just get my fingers around it so you would have no trouble reproducing with me."

There was a collective gasp.

Miss: "Now if you'll wait just a moment while I pull down my skirt."

May interjected.

May: "Your panties are wet Miss."

Miss: "Yes my panties are a little damp. This is because I'm becoming aroused at the mere sight of Jerome's phallus. As in sexually excited or turned on. So I'd better take them off too."

Miss Burstyn was now stood at the front in her heels, stockings and suspender belt displaying her hairy cunt to the entire class. She pointed to it.

Miss: "This is my womanhood. Let's call it my vagina. My external sex organs are contained in this area. The vulva. Anyone studying Latin?"

A bespectacled slightly built scholarly lad called John Smith answered.

John: "Me Miss. It means wrapper or covering."

Miss: "Correct. My sex organs are covered so you'll all need to gather around my desk to get a close look."

John: "Do I get any house points Miss?"

Miss: "No Smith I'm not made of house points."

The students formed a circle and Miss Burstyn lay back on her desk and spread her legs.

Miss: "You'll be able to see my labia majora which are here and labia minora here. Smith?"

John: "Labia majora is the Latin plural for major or big lips."

Miss: "And?"

John: "Labia minora is Latin for minor or small lips."

Miss: "Which run alongside my big lips. Sometimes referred to as 'beef curtains' and which I'll open for you now."

She prised her labia open and flicked the switch of her desk lamp on so it acted as a spotlight.

Miss: This is my urethra from the Greek ourethra 'the passage for urine'.

John: "And it's also called a urethra in Latin."

Miss: "That's right. And above it and most important of all is my little clitoris. I like to refer to it as my clitty but to others like my husband it's my clit. You won't be able to see this but it has loads of nerve endings so it's my most sensitive erogenous zone."

John: "It's like a tiny acorn Miss."

Miss: "Yes it is. Would you like to try rubbing it gently with your finger?"

John: "Yes Miss."

Miss: "As you know I'm already aroused. Now Smith is going to insert a finger and stimulate my clitty manually."

John found her clit easily. After all it was a spot lit clit. He began to massage it.

Miss: "Oh God Smith that feels so lovely."

John: "Am I doing it right Miss?"

Miss: "Yes, but just a little more pressure."

John: "Yes Miss."

He continued and she began to moan deeply.

Miss: "Stop now please."

Smith removed his finger.

Miss: "Usually if I was doing this myself I'd rub myself a little longer to the point where I climax. You girls can try this later in the privacy of your home."

June: "How will we know when we've climaxed Miss?"

Miss: "Believe me you'll know."

May: "Yes it's like an explosion...I imagine."

Miss: "An even better way of doing this in my opinion is what's known as cunnilingus. Smith?"

John Smith bent over with his tongue out.

Miss: "No Smith. Tell them what it means."

John: "The term cunnilingus is derived from the Latin words 'cunnus' and 'lingo' as in 'to lick the vulva'. So if you have a good working knowledge of the lingo it's obvious."

Miss: "Very clever Smith. So we're talking 'muff-diving', 'carpet munching' and 'drinking from the furry cup'. That sort of thing."

NB. In 1980 like Miss Burstyn most women were hirsute of twat.

Miss: "Does anyone know another method to stimulate my clitoris?"

Julian Jerome's whose cock was still out and standing proud was quick to answer.

Julian: "Yes Miss. Penile-vaginal penetration Miss."

Miss: "That's right. Penile-vaginal penetration. I'm aroused; Jerome is erect so he could penetrate me."

June was delighted.

"Oh my goodness Miss is going to let Julian fuck her!"

Miss: "Don't be ridiculous. That might constitute a breach of the teacher student Code of Professional Conduct. Fortunately I have my Orgasm 9 dildo in the top drawer of my desk. I shall simply demonstrate the penile penetration component of clitoral stimulation for you all by plunging it into my moist cunt. Now pass it over."

June opened the drawer.

"It's not in there Miss."

Miss: "That's very strange I distinctly remember putting it in my desk before I went to the staffroom for a spliff. I mean low tar cigarette. I'm really beginning to regret going to the staffroom for a spliff. I mean low tar cigarette now."

June: "No dildo. You're definitely going to have to let Julian fuck you!"

Miss: "Remember what I said?"

June: "Yes Miss. You said that if Julian fucked you it might constitute a breach of the teacher student Code of Professional Conduct."

Miss: "Correct. Has anyone brought a phallic shaped fruit or vegetable in their packed lunch?"

May: "Isn't getting fucked by foodstuff a breach too?"

Miss: "No. Has anyone got a banana or a carrot?"

Class: "No Miss!"

Miss: "Alright would anyone like to see if Miss can fit a cucumber inside her crack?"

June: "There are no cucumbers Miss."

Miss: "Zucchinis?"

May: "Zucchinis? What are Zucchinis?"

Miss: "Smith?"

John: "Italian for courgette."

Miss: "I'm disgusted. You don't have a single piece of dick like fruit and veg'. Have none of you any regard for your well being?"

Gerry: "We're not very health conscious Miss."

Miss: "Alright. Any salami, chorizo, German sausage? I'm not prejudiced. Or vegetarian."

Gerry: "We get free school dinners Miss."

Miss: "I give up! Could you come over Jerome?"

The class began to murmur. They were extremely excited. Julian was as excited as it was humanly possible to be. Miss Burstyn took hold of his erection and guided it towards slowly towards her gaping cunt. Too slowly. It was tragic. The slight pressure tipped him over the edge and he began to pump his load over her ample chest.

The class stood open mouthed. Miss Burstyn lay back open legged. Somehow Julian had missed an open goal. But the young teacher was quick to recover.

Miss: "Jerome has just given me a pearl necklace in an unconventional manner. Usually it's the culmination of a Bombay Roll. That's not something you pick up from an Indian takeaway. It's when a gentleman fucks a ladies tits. Sadly he's now out of the state of sexual arousal. His penis is flaccid so I'll need another volunteer."

Winston Spencer a tall powerfully built lad who had recently arrival at the school by way of Kingston was the quickest to step forward. Miss Burstyn's gaze was drawn to a huge bulge in his pants.

Miss: "I thought nobody had a cucumber."

Winston: "I don't Miss. It's the outline of my trouser snake."

Miss: "Don't worry class; the trouser snake is just slang for penis. It won't bite me."

She sat back up in order to undo his belt and his pants dropped around his ankles. His dick sprang out, long, thick, hard, circumcised and dark. Winston who it should be said had come from Kingston Jamaica and not Kingston-Upon-Thames let Miss Burstyn explain.

Miss: "Girls. The average penis is more like Jerome's. Fortunately the visual of him turned me on and Smith got me damp with his finger so I think I'm going to be capable of accommodating Spencer. The thought of what he's about to do to me has helped my blood vessels including those to my cunt to dilate even more and if you look inside me you'll see I'm now soaking wet. This will to help lubricate him so he can impale me fully."

Winston: "Shall I try to put it inside your pussy now Miss?"

Miss: "Just rub your glans on my clit please so everyone can see while I explain a couple of points."

Winston: "Alright Miss."

Miss: "Oh Spencer. That feels so fucking good! Firstly I need to mention just in case any of the girls don't know that Spencer when he's not satisfying me with it also uses his penis to urinate. Secondly before it disappears inside me for a long time that the glans is the rounded part that forms the end of Spencer's penis."

Winston: "Deeper now Miss?"

Miss: Yes please. Just a little. Right. Spencer's penis is the copulatory organ and he's now started to demonstrate copulation."

Winston: "A bit more now?"

Miss Burstyn yelled.

Miss: "Oh yes! Yes! Give me more. I'm cumming like a bitch on fucking heat you stud!"

Then as her first orgasm subsided she added.

Miss: "Orgasms are muscular convulsions in the lower back and pelvis. I feel fan fucking tastic."

She managed to point at the dick that was practically nailing her to the desk.

Miss: "The second part of Spencer's penis is his shaft. I'm really opening up for him and he's able to get most of it in. So he's now literally shafting me."

Winston's strokes were quickening.

Winston: "Can you take some more?"

And Miss Burstyn squealed.

Miss: "Oh Jesus yes! I'm cumming again you beast!"

The class looked on in amazement as Winston forced yet more cock into their teacher's overstretched gash. As Miss Burstyn orgasmed again May and June instinctively took an ankle each and prised her legs further apart. When the teacher stopped screaming Winston asked.

Winston: "Are you ready for the rest now?"

Miss: "As ready as I'll ever be."

She braced herself and he drove it in to the hilt. Miss Burstyn gasped and said to her class.