A Hole Between Rooms Ch. 04

I locked the bathroom door, set my clean clothes on the counter then sat down on the toilet seat, my head in my hands. I took a moment breathing in and breathing out.

A bit of background. While it's obvious I'm an introvert, I had a mental awakening back in drama classes and eventually in plays. It was a set of rules I could play a part in where I knew exactly what to say and how to say it. A place where cliche behavior and unreasonable confidence were seen as expected while not changing the views others had of me.

And at the end of it, the curtain would fall, the scene would close, and I could take a breath and release the mask, becoming myself again. This charade affected how I handle difficult situations. My brain quantifies problems as things to be addressed by a certain version of me. Not behavior as a whole, just particular responses and lines of thought.

I also think I'm at least a little bit on the spectrum, though I haven't gotten tested yet. Would explain a lot.

The reason I tell you these things is that while I may seem to have moments of bravery in this sibling situation, on the inside I'm terrified. It's all a mask to distract from my spiking blood and crippling anxiety.

I had hoped to keep the tempo of our charged interactions in my court. Instead, I was caught with the evidence of my own enjoyment/shame for her to gawk at. Great. My mind sees a thousand possibilities for how this all resolves, but at that moment, none of them seemed real.

Now, looking back on it, the situation was hot. Sitting there in that bathroom, I was more concerned with the next steps.

Setting the shower on cold, I got cleaned up again. When getting out, I looked my body over in the mirror. I don't have the just-barely-visible abs of pre-pandemic Jay, but I've kept in good enough shape to be content. Looking south, I must confess the hair downstairs had become overgrown. My ex had been a lover of the natural look, so I hadn't had cause to trim, but I know most women prefer it at least reasonably groomed. I rummaged through the drawer that contained all my things and pulled out the clipper bag.

Getting to work, I carefully edged around all the sensitive bits, working to create a relatively even appearance of upkeep. Once satisfied, I hopped back in the shower to rinse off and double-checked everything.

After dropping off my dirty clothes in the hamper, I walked by the kitchen, popping in to let Nola know I was going to work on her IT issues. With a distracted wave, I headed to her bedroom and booted up her computer. I started all my usual prep to clean the easy things before diving into the actual problem. While waiting for those to run, I put in my earbuds and scrolled through TikTok, only glancing back at the monitor to confirm prompts before the next step.

Some time passed by in that routine before an unexpected tap on my shoulder prompted me to turn and see Nola motioning to her ear, non-verbally asking to be heard. I pulled out the buds.

"What's the prognosis, doc?" Nola asked

"She's dead, Jim," I replied

"No, but seriously, this thing has been pissing me off every damn day. Have you figured out why I'm getting popups?" said Nola

"Not yet, I'm currently doing the basic steps before getting to the problem. Takes time, but this part's almost done. What's for dinner by the way?" I asked.

"By request of dad, we're doing pizza. I'm also making chocolate pudding for dessert."

"Nice, where are we getting the pizza from?"

"Excuse me?" she exclaimed more than asked, "I'm making the pizza," she said, indignance in her voice for me expecting delivery.

"Oh, gotcha, didn't know that was in your repertoire. I'm sure it will be good," I said.

"Damn right it'll be good. Also picked up some premium pepperoni to go with it at the store," she said.

Soon after she says this, the program I was using on her computer flagged and quarantined a suspected file, showing up in bright red. She pointed to the screen.

"Red bad?" she asked

"Red not good," I say and pulled up the details. I did some investigating, but long story short the problem was with a file that was originally downloaded from a rather suspicious sounding site. I saw the title included "sapphic" and "erotic" before a hand reached out for the mouse and dragged the cursor to the corner, closing the browser.

Not wanting to overreact, I at first did nothing. Staring at the screen for a moment as though nothing happened, I then slowly turn to Nola, raising an eyebrow at her. She was silent.

I cleared my throat, leaning back in the chair and steepling my fingers in a mock show of professorship.

"Fun fact, a huge number of viruses enter computers through porn sites," I said.

She said nothing, looking to the side, then examined her nails.

"Another fun fact is when that happens, it's usually by clicking on an ad or an offer of some kind," I said evenly.

Nola looked at me pointedly, "I've never clicked on an ad in my life."

"Sure, sure", I replied, "But might you have clicked on something that said 'download' wanting to get a copy?"

Nola's eyes went just slightly wider, her stance changing almost imperceptibly, unsure of herself.

"So you can fix the popup now?", she asked, less defiant now.

"Well," I began "that depends. You see, it's difficult to fix a problem I'm not allowed to look at. Can I have the mouse?", I reached out my hand to her.

She looked down, gave me back the mouse, and stood over my shoulder while I pulled the browser back up.

I found the page we'd been on, pulling up the website name. It was indeed sapphic erotica and seemed pretty tasteful too. Nothing rang alarm bells in my head, but I saw this wasn't the only page with a similar theme. Going back to the history, I scrolled further, finding other, similar content.

Now, the type of content wasn't surprising at all, Nola is bi but leans towards women. What was so great about this moment was this look of helplessness Nola showed while looking from me to the computer, to the ceiling, blush came to her cheeks and neck.

And I gotta say, she is NEVER the one of us three that gets embarrassed like this. It's always Eve or myself who feels the brunt of her teasing. It was a sweet moment of sibling rivalry, and I couldn't deny the thrill of this considering everything else happening in the household.

Scrolling through the pages, I considered my next words carefully.

"Sister, if you're going to download naughty things, you should be more careful. These sites are a harbor for malware. You should just stream it rather than try and download anything," I said.

She seemed about to say something but thought better of it.

"What was that?" I asked

"Um..." she mumbled "Okay, don't laugh, but I have a stupid question."

"Shoot."

"What are you supposed to do if you bookmark a site or a video and then later it's gone?" she asked, barely getting the words out.

"You know, that's a great question. I prefer new stuff typically, but I suppose if you have particular favorites it would make sense to save them.." I trailed off.

"Well okay then, how does one save without getting popups?" Nola said

"It's..not something that can be easily explained right this moment unless you got time for me to sit down and show you some things you'll need to remember," I said tentatively.

Nola looked over her shoulder toward the hallway, then back at me.

"I gotta go then, we'll talk about this later" and then she added "Not a word of this to anyone, little brother. This is a circle of trust now," she said, eyes making meaningful glares and vague arm movements.

"Oh, I see, when I fuck up it's comedy hour, but when YOU have egg on the face, we're a family and need to trust each other. I see how it is." I responded sarcastically, "I won't tell the family, although I don't know why it bothers you that much, everyone looks at porn."

She seemed about to say something, then instead turned to leave.

"Although I may have to bookmark a few of these myself," I said, turning back to the monitor. Again, she seemed desperate to add something but retreated to the hallway instead.

After finishing in her room, I headed back to mine and log in for work. I have a job that baseline's 40 hours a week but offers overtime often. I grab it when possible to get that extra cash. I hate the job since management changed, but nothing else I can find pays as well while 100% work from home.

After a few hours of that, I got a text that dinner was on and head out. As I reached the stairs, Eve exited her room heading my way. I half expected her to say something, but rather she just smiled at me and bounced up the stairs humming a tune I didn't catch.

Dinner was excellent. Initially, I looked for an opportunity to grab some pizza to take downstairs, but it turned into one of those larger family gatherings one is expected to stay and partake in. During the eatery, I occasionally caught Nola looking at me, then looking away when I turned to her. I could have been imagining it, but who knows?

After dinner I grabbed some beers and headed downstairs to finish up the overtime I signed on for. As I walked across the den floor, Eve called to me.

"Hey, Jay, wait up" I heard, her voice echoing from the stairwell. She came into view, a couple of beers in hand as well. "Up for another movie night?", her eyes drilling into mine, seeming to make promises.

You will all hate me for this, but I had to turn her down.

"Sorry, I'd love nothing more, but I signed up for this overtime last week, gotta see it through." the words fell off my lips with no little hesitation.

"Come on, please?" she begged, taking a step closer.

"...I would love NOTHING more, but my hands are tied," I responded, eyeing the door to my bedroom, never having hated the sight of it more.

"Oh, okay, I understand. Hope it goes well." Eve said, sashaying into her room.

I stared after her, hating past Jay so much for obligating my time like this.

I worked a while until the later evening. I headed to bed shortly after. Laying down in the dark, I spent the time before sleep typing down on my phone everything that happened to keep the memory fresh, then went online browsing, thinking, drifting off to sleep.

As this went on, I get a text message. It's from Nola.

N: hey you upp??

J: Was just about to go to bed, but yeah.

N: oh nvm ttyl

I read this text, then went back online before the horny part of my brain reminded me why Nola may be reaching out.

J: Was this about...your computer?

No immediate response. I worry a moment she already turned everything on silent to sleep, then a buzz from my phone.

N: yea come up

And with those three words, I quickly got off of the bed and was about to put my pajama pants on when I instead remembered I should wear my boxers and a t-shirt. Nothing more. I want to tell you I had a plan, but I never really do.

It's Eve that's been the focus of all this, but how can I say no when my eldest sister is asking for computer help with thoughts of explicit conversation?

I left my room and walked across the den, seeing that Eve's light was off in her room.

Upstairs, I came to Nola's door, the light was on. I knocked twice softly, the door opened almost immediately.

Nola was standing there, now wearing my usual garb, t-shirt, and pj pants. A notable change, though, was she no longer wore a bra. Her nipples were easily visible through the white shirt. She looked behind me before ushering me in with a wave.

She sat on the couch at the end of her bed, then looked at me.

"Do you have any idea what's going on with Eve?" Nola asked, catching me completely off guard. I had been expecting a different line of conversation. I organized my thoughts for a moment, then responded.

"How do you mean?" I said.

"You didn't notice her during dinner?" she asks.

"Uh, well, she was there, but I feel like that's not where you're going with this."

Nola looks at me like I'm the village idiot.

"No, she was obviously distracted by something, she hardly talked at all. I thought maybe Mark had reached out to her?" she said

Mark is an ex of Eve's and a borderline stalker. He's caused trouble and is bad for Eve's self-esteem.

I told her no, I don't think he's reached out, Eve would have said something.

"Alright, well that's good. So nothing's going on with her?"

"Nope, not that I can think of", I lied between my teeth. Nola would have to waterboard me before I'd give her the details.

"Well, fine, maybe it's just some depression," she said.

"Maybe," I said appealingly. I looked over at her computer, "Everything good with that now?"

"Yep, well, yeah it's fine, but you said something about wanting to show me something I need?" she said, not making eye contact. I felt as though she was trying to be very nonchalant.

"Oh your porn viruses, yes, those. Don't click download links on random websites, that's bad bad bad. There are better ways, although to be honest, right now we don't really have the time. I'll need to sit down and explain a few things about computers that you'll need to grasp," I advised.

"I feel like no one else cares about that, why am I getting viruses?" she protested.

"Well, other people just stream their smut rather than download. That means you don't have to deal with those other things."

"Aw, I see. I just..." she trails off

"What?"

"umm..."

"Spit it out"

"That's what he said" she jibed, a small impish smirk on her lips. Nola loves to break awkwardness with bad jokes.

"You don't swallow? Now I see why you don't prefer guys!" I said, my arms outstretched in triumph.

The joke seemed to land, she pushed against my chest, huffing at me.

"Okay, I'll show you tomorrow or sometime soon how to safely download what you want..." It was now my turn to trail off. A thought occurred. When cleaning her computer, I never came across any large amounts of porn, just parts. There were two possibilities, either she deleted the media after some period of time or...

"Nola, where DO you store all the porn you download on this computer?" I asked

She seemed to pale, I was close enough to catch her pupils dilating. I could almost swear I saw her gulp.

I explained that there were almost certainly viruses wherever she saved them and would need to be looked at to prevent reinfection, and she relented. Asking me to close my eyes, she apparently went to her hiding place and then pulled out of the drive, walking back telling me I can open them. I took the flash drive and plugged it in. I won't bore you with the details of sandboxing for IT security, so suffice it to say I knew how to access it without risking reinfection.

As I'm opening it, Nola piped up.

"Don't be weird about this, but I have some kinks and I don't want to be judged here," she said, her voice cracking mid-sentence.

I opened the two folders, labeled "pictures" and "videos". Under pictures were hundreds of still images showing individual and grouped sections, almost entirely hentai. A cascade of cartoon pussies and cocks littered the screen, a range of artistic skills among the variety.

"Damn, I may need to get a copy of this," I said, almost a kneejerk reaction.

"Um, sure, I don't care" came the response behind me. I turned and Nola was sitting on her bed, her knees up to her chin as she faced me. She's always preferred to sit like this.

"I won't be able to tonight, but I'll get it off you later, okay?"

"Yeah, whatever, it's fine," came her reply, cheeks hidden behind her legs.

An almost unreal feeling passed.

After browsing the pictures, I saw nothing amiss but run some scans to be sure. Then, I opened the video folder. No real organization there either, I was sad to realize. Just a sea of thumbnails showing various scenes. Most of them were just randomly labeled, but a few had partial titles.

"'Step-sister gets it'", I read aloud, squinting at the screen.

"Don't READ them, you little cretin!" Nola whisper-screamed, throwing a pillow at me.

"My my my, isn't that interesting", I said, intending to project an air of knowing. As you might expect, I was rock hard at this moment, my boxers straining against the button holding the front closed. It was clear to me this erection wasn't going away any time soon, so I had few options. The only way I would be leaving this room without her seeing it at all was some weird, half shuffle toward the door, losing every ounce of pride in my being.

That established, if she was going to see me tented, I wanted two things. To keep the relationship tempo going forward, and not do anything to damage our existing dynamic.

I quickly ran the needed steps, finding sub-folders of malware in the video downloads that came as zips. Those taken care of, I swiveled around in the chair toward where she was sitting and stood up facing her, erection standing at attention, the tip of my head pressed directly into the back of the button.

"I'm gonna head to bed and try to still get a few hours of sleep before tomorrow. I'll talk to you later and get you everything you need." I turned and walk forward opening her door and with my left hand on the door frame, I turned back showing a profile view of me tenting, no shame at all.

"Oh, and Nola?" I said, looking into her eyes, which were having trouble staying with mine. "Have a great night.", extending a warm smile her way, I left closing the door behind me.

I got back to my room without incident, getting under the covers and falling asleep almost instantly.

The next morning I rolled out of bed and lazily got ready for my role as a cog in the capitalist machine. That accomplished, it was early evening and I was hungry. Too early for dinner, so I grabbed a snack from the kitchenette in the den. Eve texted me asking if I was done with work for the day, then joined me on the couch. Dressed in a t-shirt and pj shorts, she looked amazing as always.

I had lost a little courage since the previous night and opted to stay with a t-shirt and pj pants, but no boxers. The material was very thin, having been worn for years.

I was sitting up on the end of the couch with the arm-rest under my right side. Eve sat down on my left and leaned into me, having me put my arm around her. We talked briefly about things to watch, then settled on the movie IT, which I'd seen but she hadn't.

As the movie progressed, I decided to make a small move. As my hand rested on her side, I moved my thumb back and forth, caressing her through the t-shirt. I kept the movement at a steady rhythm, back and forth. She had no obvious reaction to this.

Very slowly, as carefully as I could, my hand moved down towards where her t-shirt met the shorts. Keeping the steady rhythm going, my thumb rubbed back and forth, eventually getting just under the edge of the t-shirt, meeting skin.

It was the smallest thing, but this got the adrenaline pumping. Controlling my breathing, I continued the work of now bringing my hand, and therefore thumb, upwards, so so slowly. Around this time, I got noticeably hard, tenting upwards against my otherwise flat lap.

In this position, Eve's head was below mine, so I couldn't tell if/when she looked, but I did notice the increase in random body fidgets she had soon after.

My hand worked upwards, now half my palm was making contact with her smooth, warm skin. Around then I was able to feel her heartbeat. It was fast, that I could tell easily. She was there, in the moment with me.

I don't know why, but it was then I decided to lean down and kiss the top of her head. I held it there for a moment, some affection taking control of me. I felt her shudder.

She lightly drops her right hand on my left thigh.

I kissed the top of her head again, my hand moving upwards so slowly. And then, my hand ran into a warm obstacle, not fabric in the least.