All Comments on 'A Long Time Coming'

Sweet story, Hooked. Thanks for posting. I'm looking forward to your St. Patrick's Day story, Randi.

That was an entertaining story, Mr. 1957. It was recommended to me, and I enjoyed it. I'll read anything you write.

The story was okay, but it was basically all narration, which sucked most of the emotion out if it. I think you tried to cover too many events at just a surface level. Each later scene had a memorable line from a character, but that's all... and that's not dialogue.

I don't know why he didn't stay together with Allison after her prom. They were good friends and had great chemistry, so they would've made a really nice couple. Instead, he wasted 14 years dating random women that weren't into him.

Another great, entertained story, but that is my expectation when I see Hooked1957 on the author’s line. Man waited for the right girl and won the game. Just a good old happy ending. Nothing else written today should even share the page with this.

But I would have preferred a little more information about the families, about whether he got his higher degree and taught, etc, etc. Thanks for the effort.

no one is married or cheating on their spouse so why is this in LW?

I really enjoyed it

Just what I need . A short, clever, humane, funny, sexy story. This author never lets me down . Thanks.

This was okay but it seemed like a lot of separate mini stories. The main characters were set up to be him and Traci but that just got lost. No one cheated - good - but I'm not sure what to take from this except that he settled down with a nice girl he knew from school.

Love this xtory! Typical Hoked Traci behavior, but a wonderful long-term developing love story between Allison and Rob, in only two pages. Well done!

Thank God for unanswered prayers. great song but more important what it can mean in life

He was a lucky guy the day his luck seemed to run out with Traci. Nice story and well told. I am looking forward to see what you come up with for the St. Paddy's Day event.

but it probably should have been under romance.

As well as his dad.

Physically.

And financially.

Pretty lame really.

Great job, Mr. Hooked. Another 5* performance.

I have two thoughts about Traci and the Prom, one positive, one negative. On the positive side, we've seen what happens when wives have no experience with other men, so "seeing" other guys IS probably a good thing. On the negative side, as he says, they'll be going off to college in the fall, plenty of time to experience new people.

/

Cutting her off for years seems a little extreme.

/

Anybody who signs a prenup without having a lawyer look at it is a fool. Meanwhile, her ex f-i-l is a real piece of work being so vindictive when HIS son was the cheater. I wouldn't expect to not enforce the prenup, but why blackball her? hat did she do to deserve that?

/

She doesn't want to be treated like a five-year-old, then don't act like one!

Only thing I don't understand is why he and allison stopped communicating for so long. I don't disagree with the story where he wasn't ready for a commitment with her but they had a good history, got along great, and could have been very close friends.

Glad they got together at the end and glad Traci realizes what she is and where she landed.

Not very interesting, in fact it was boring at times. Tell me again, why was this in LW?

Feels a little detached compared to Hooked's usual stories. The protagonist doesn't really let himself get too caught up in emotions after the initial Traci snub, so he avoids a lot of the drama. But without those hooks, we're just reading about him smoothly moving from one event to another without any fuss, before finally settling down into his happily ever after. Don't get me wrong, sounds like a great life, but maybe not a great story.

Nice enjoyable tale! Thanks for the offering.

So, glad he never got back together with Traci again. She pretty must showed her true colors with the shit she pulled with the Prom. In most cases, past behavior is an indication of future behavior.

Getting back together with Allison was a nice touch. They started out as friends and remained as such over the years even though they paths diverged from each other until fate brought them back together years later.

Good, solid and enjoyable story.

Great story, well written, light and entertaining. We need more of this.

This is a wonderful story. His early relationship with Traci was very much like a marriage, at least in his eyes, and I think in her eyes too. Once she stepped outside the "marriage", he couldn't trust her any more. His instincts proved to be correct.

Finding another date for prom may have seemed like a small thing at the time, but it hurt him badly and set them on two different paths. Even at that young age, maybe she was just showing her true character.

Maya Angelou said: "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."

Steve paid attention to what Traci showed him and had no need to ever be taught that lesson again. Actions have consequences. Great story. 5 stars.

However, I noticed a continuity error. You said they just celebrated their 30th anniversary, so presumably they were supposed to have been married not later than 1991. You also stated that sometime prior to their wedding Alison contacted him via text message. The first text was sent December 3, 1992 (google it). So that doesn't add up. But thanks for posting. This story reminded me of some of JPB's stories that I enjoyed.

An “All’s well that ends well” 5* classic from a Master! Thanks.

I appreciate your well-written story. Only a scant few technical errors (rare here on Literotica) kept the distractions to a minimum, which I admire and am grateful for. Thank you.

I always enjoy a hooked1957 story. I guess you could say I'm hooked.

. . . with one exception, no one was lying to anyone else or cheating. They were all very honest. Weird. Is this a new genre? ;-)

A very entertaining story well told! I liked that the path that was mapped out wasn't the right one, but a completely unexpected one! What I found very good is that everyone was in view for a long time. Thanks for it!

It's nice to see he didn't stay with his high school friends and expanded his horizons at least a little bit. Molly was too old so that was doomed from the get go. Allison was a rebound that worked out very well.

And wonder of wonders for the first time I can remember someone knows how to spell BREATHE.

Promise kept. Good job

IF you had bothered to read the story, you would know Traci cheated and went through four husbands.

Oh...the writing was technically good, as per usual for you. But your MC lacked any core to his personality. There was something missing, or “off” about how he basically wandered listless thru relationships.

And like Tadja noted....the story was a collection of mini vignettes with little to commend them to the MC’s tale. What was the point?

In sum....not bad...not great. 3***

Green Eyes Again. Ugh! So unlikely.

Enjoyed the story and like that he didn't relent and return to Tracy.

Felt like I was wandering amidst an English Maze as I read this offering.

Great tale and well worth the 5 stars I granted it.

Maybe a nice romance but didn't have the LW feel. A good story, though.

Nice fairytale ****

First, nice story 5 stars!

His dating the 42 year old divorcee, and feeling awkward about initiating the sex, brought up a memory for me. When I was a freshman in college I worked part time as a teller in a bank. I loved women, and luckily for me women loved me too. It was a large branch, and I had dated all the attractive tellers there, and I literally had attractive female customers that would wait in line to get me, and had dated a lot of the customers as well. This was a well off area so there were plenty of very attractive women that lived and worked in the area.

Now to the memory. Even though I was dating all these women and was a huge flirt and very confident, this one gorgeous woman who would come in and flirt with me would throw me off. She was stunning, sophisticated, very well-off (I had access to her checking and savings account info after all), and very seductively she would flirt after she would wait to get me. She was the only woman I would get nervous around when she flirted with me.

After she came in one day and again hinted if I was free that weekend, which I ignored from nervousness, I went to talk to the 27 year old loan officer who I was banging as well. I told her about the 32 year old, and that I wanted her so badly, but told her what would I do with a rich, sophisticated woman like that. Where would I take her. What did I have to offer to her. She told me, "look John, you're 19 and she's 32. She's not looking to marry you. She wants to fuck you. Just take her out and fuck her." I ended up doing much more than that as I dated that 32 year old for several months, and learned a great deal about life from her.

Another wonderful memory from that time was that I fucked the 27 year old and a twenty year old teller in my bank manager's jacuzzi one day after we had a meeting at her house. We had had a meeting at her house, with someone from the district there, and she admonished us the next day that they all heard us inside. But I was 19, and it was a part time job. I could care less if I lost it. But luckily no one did.

Now almost 50, with a wife and a kid, remembering this put a nice big smile on my face. Wife should be getting some attention later on tonight.

Very good fun read well written and a thank you for writing!

It was cute.

The MC says he dodged a bullet by not marrying Traci since she had four marriages, implying there was something wrong with her. But let's remember that he himself got married at 35. He got dumped by the divorcee, and later the woman he wanted to marry broke up with him to date another man. He essentially got someone's else's reject in Allison. He had gone from one person to another, getting dumped multiple times along the way, till he lucked out in catching Allison while she was down and out.

Traci being curious about dating another boy, having only known the MC is normal. Her doing it for the prom was very immature, short sighted, and obviously hurtful. But then again she was 16 and likely clueless. If these two had stayed had only dated one another from childhood, by the time they were forty one or both of them would have likely cheated out of curiosity on what they missed out on.

If the MC had cared about Traci as much as he should have since they grew up together and were so close and inseparable, then he should not be gleeful that he dodged a bullet by not marrying Traci. He should be sad for her that she hadn't LUCKED out like he had. And who knows if what happened in high school with the MC wasn't a major contributing factor in Traci having unsuccessful relationships.

I wouldn't have minded if after many years apart if he and Traci got back together, married and had a wonderful life together. I took what Traci did more as immaturity, then being a cheater. I don't blame him for breaking up with her, but years later reconnecting after both matured more and grew up would have been a good outcome. Allison marriage working out and not going through a divorce herself, and the MC and Traci all ending up happy. Successful outcome for everyone. But then again that wouldn't have been an LW story. In LW stories the girl/woman that doesn't see the MC (the man the male reader identifies with) as the only possible man for her and not even look at another man, must have long term suffering for daring to possibly be interested in another boy/man. Not a knock on Hooked (gave the story a five), just the genre itself.

Aptly named author as hooked from the first page again! Well plotted and well written as expected. Thank you for your excellent efforts.

Good story really enjoyed it. You rarely have a bad’n this is not one of them,and I like your work anyway.

Scores 5/5 in my book

Another of that rare LW breed...a good story!

Well done.

I usually like your stories but this one drifted all over the place and didn't really feel like it had a direction. And you put so much emphasis on traci in the beginning and then nothing after that, she really seemed like a pointless character.

Better story than most but it kind of meandered around.

I was sure that the feel good ending would be he and Traci getting back together. I was wrong and this was a better tale because of it. Five Stars

I believe every writer rightfully owns the characters and their actions. So it is an observation and not a criticism when I suggest that there is no more evidence that he dodged a bullet with Jody than that a good woman ruined her life in a failed quest for the kind of attachment they once shared. Everyone makes mistakes, and often none worse than in the hormonal teen years. I saw a comment suggesting this story does not fit LW. Well, they weren’t married but it sure can be construed as BTB overkill.

Nice feel good short, though you may have done better putting it in Romance.

The start is reminiscent of a few others where the steady GF accepts and invite from someone else to the senior prom "it's only one night..."

Thank you

5 STARS! Now a favorite. Be reading more of your stories soon.

Always a good read. Thank you. 5

A long hard way to find his mate.

Good Story, Love your writing, sometime PLEASE tell us who Traci is.

@sbrooks103x, so what is your point with your comment? Seems to me you're just pointing out what you don't like, not a critique in my book.

Four stars. This belongs in the Romance category. I really thought Traci would have got him back.

Some people take commitment seriously, Traci didn't. Some people don't take promises seriously, Drew didn't. Both lived to regret not respecting honor!

like a B grade product in a creative writing class. Technically adequate, but otherwise flat and unemotional. The whole Traci aspect was puzzling. It was High School; who gives a fuck? So he closed her out of his life. If he had married her they might have been happy ever after. We'll never know, nor care. Why did he care?

Then the whole Allison thing didn't make sense. He obviously didn't care enough to expend the time and energy to stay in her life. After her divorce, Then they reconnect? That part is so contrived that it sucks any romance and drama out of the plot.

So, the teacher might give you a B, but I know you can do better. Hope you do, next time.

Thanks for the effort.

Good story!

5

Traci was a hmmm, not sure what to call her.

But she didnt love him, not do do what she did.

I liked the story.

Well done.

Nice.

A little peek into teenage relationships

and what comes after.

I found it enjoyable, realistic and well done.

Top ratings from me.

Wow. That was simply great.

...have texts 30yrs. ago?

Good story, by-the-way.

5*****

I liked it a lot. Brought back memories. 5*s

Enjoyed the story. Not to sure of your timeline, but it seamed original, or as original as you can find on a sight that talks about cheating wives or girlfriends. One thing that made me scratch my head was in the story you said Allison text Stevie and asked "you out there?" then in the epilogue you said they celebrated there 30th anniversary. 30 years ago they didn't have cell phones and no way to text.

Still a four star rated story. Thank you. Keep swinging for the fence.

There were cell phones 30 years ago.

Barely. They were the size of a brick though.

It is amazing how much they have revolutionized our world.

One day I expect to read fanfic of a Musketeer and him having a cellphone ;)

That's what I love about your stories. This one was long on narration at the cost of dialogue, but it read so smoothly that it didn't make any difference. Another home run, monsieur!

Thank you. 5*

Good story, thanks.

Yes there were cell phones 30 years ago, but texting wasn’t available until about 1999, so 20 odd years.

4 husband in 25 years, Traci surely get what she wanted....hahaha. Definitely a 5 star.🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

If Shakespeare could use a Clock in “Julius Caesar“ when the Romans did not have clocks, there is nothing wrong with using an anachronism to move the story along.

He dodged at least two bullets. Finally an LW character making good decisions about choosing a wife.

Other bullet being Molly the old slut dating/fucking another man most of the time she was dating and fucking him. That bullet should have been easy to dodge and perhaps it was given how long he dated her without asking for exclusivity much less marriage. So maybe he was just banging the older milf.

Bullet avoided, shows what happens when you stick to your guns and do the right thing. Enjoyable tale.

Ive never understood the motivations of the

"I refuse to forgive my virgin high school girlfriend for going on one date even though we've never talked about being exclusive, but I dont care that literally every woman I will date until I get married has multiple sex partners while dating me" charecter

boy he dodged a bullet, good story

what happened to my little chicken fighting buddy? she looke like shit. lmao.. that has to b 1 of th funiest lines on this site.

Tis was a good read. I wasn't sure where he was going, but glad I stuck with it. It read like life. If you want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans. 5 stars; the Bear approves. Keep plugging; You still have a ways to go to make 50.

The BEAR

What's up with the pedofile?

Great story. It' close to real life where things just don't go according to what one expects or wants. A comment below makes me laugh and also agree, "If you want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans."! Enjoyed the story. 5 stars.

I think it's too sad that he wasted so many of their best years away from Allison.

It kinda ruins the happy ending. They should have come together much earlier, and he should have taken some initiative.

It falls flat and not exactly romantic when he's being so passive about things rather than actually pursuing her.

Also there's a whole lot of telling, not much showing when it comes to the characters. You write several times that he's having fun with Allison, but you don't actually show it at any point that either of them are fun.

Or much else

The MC might love irony, but he doesn't know what it actually is. Marrying someone exactly 17 years after first dating is not irony. What a moron.

As usual, I enjoyed your story. I also wasn't sure where you were taking this but enjoyed the ride! 5 stars.

somewhere east of Omaha

It’s a very good story. I thought some time could have bb

Even taken to tiptoe through his time married to Allison And his first flames 4 marriages.

Drifting left, drifting right, not bad. Perhaps you are better writing non-cheating plotless stuff but this way the stories won't be long.

Feels like a JPB story but without the cheating, the fuck up people or the stupidity.

A 17 or 18 year old had nearly a dozen orgasms? Okay champ. Absolutely hilarious ss77

There is practically nothing to this story to even remotely justify the score. It has no plot and doesn't even have much in the way of character development.

Rider (after reading your note on your contact page Angel DOESN'T fit)- everyone has a right to their opinion but feel you are wrong, not a first for you I imagine. Thank you Hooked, entertaining with familiar elements from my past.

somewhere east of Omaha

When Traci skipped out of the prom to sample some strange I worried that would be the plot. So glad he left her & didn’t knuckle in with the outside pressure.

Great story & deserves a five 🌟 stars.

Bill

It was great you skipped JPB old and repetitive plot. Girlfriend cheats on him once... twice... even three times. MC forgives her every time... and even marries her and... surprise, surprise... she cheats on him.

ok.

Struggled with the timing of events but other than that a good story

Good for a change he wasn't ruined by his original girlfriend even if he was the usual to stupid to see the girl he should have been with.

I don't know if writing these stories is therapy for author over being treated horribly by a "Traci" in his real life or if he just really hates his MC and enjoys them suffering and wasting the bulk of their lives on horrible self centered monsters.

I also don't know why I keep reading different stories hoping to find something where the MC gets a decent turn for a larger portion of their existence. Hooked1957 writes well enough but I think I need a decent palette cleanser of some sort to alleviate the morose mood the last several stories I read by them has evoked.

Better karma, not that Drew didn't deserve a punch in the nose, would be Steve having a college buddy who was a lawyer and knew a PI. When it turned that Drew's daddy and the HR director (who was male) were having an affair, pictures and other other evidence that Drew inherited daddy's inability to keep zipper zipped were introduced in court when Allison sued for wrongful dismissal, etc.

Interesting. This one is a nice read. Nothing exceptional yet it really rings of a real history. I agree that some of these tales are somewhat therapeutic for the author in purging old wounds. While this story doesn’t have any real glaring issues in that respect I wish the author well and say thanks for an enjoyable tale.

You let him keep his balls and his brain,amazing stuff.

It was good he understood her nature when she first “roamed” on him.

We’re we all that perceptive the world would be a better place.

And when a girlfriend steps out, instead of lamenting the loss look at it as what it really is—a blessing for finding out before it gets worse.

Bill S.

He found the right one for a second time. This Traci was pretty benign as a villainess, as she is usually a monster.

I notice people trashing JPB but they miss the point, they may not admit it but just like chocolate - a lot of peoples hidden secret is reading JPB! If wasn't for Bob a lot of people might not have had the chance to know other fine story tellers like Hooked! Thank you for this tale, 3rd time through.

somewhere east of Omaha